Funny Seeking Friendly Advice Poems
#funny
funny seeking friendly advice poems. Friendly advice and comments have been requested for these poems.
missjem56
Poem Published
1st Mar 2025 1:46am
1st Mar 2025 1:46am
Mirrors
I went along to join a new group recently
I may of misread the details though
What i thought was a writing group of sorts
As about a dozen of us turned up
Some looked a bit long in the tooth
And a bit pale, and actually quite goth-like
So i thought okay, i'm here now,
So decided to go along for the ride
They soon started talking about bats
Which sounded quite interesting
Especially about bats in the attic
And how 8uncomfortable they found it
I thought they were concerned at their plight
But it turned out i was seriously wrong...
I may of misread the details though
What i thought was a writing group of sorts
As about a dozen of us turned up
Some looked a bit long in the tooth
And a bit pale, and actually quite goth-like
So i thought okay, i'm here now,
So decided to go along for the ride
They soon started talking about bats
Which sounded quite interesting
Especially about bats in the attic
And how 8uncomfortable they found it
I thought they were concerned at their plight
But it turned out i was seriously wrong...
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#satirical
#surreal
#vampires
65 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
28th Feb 2025 2:15am
28th Feb 2025 2:15am
Timeless
Watched
a
programme
All
about
infinity
Went
on
for
ages!
by Jemia
a
programme
All
about
infinity
Went
on
for
ages!
by Jemia
#funny
#philosophical
#universe
73 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
25th Feb 2025 4:45pm
25th Feb 2025 4:45pm
Purrfectly Quackers!
When i had cats
I used to be able
To purr with them
Just like that!
Whilst a meandering
Down memory lane
I tried purring
But just sounded insane!
Like a bad impersonation
Of Donald Duck
Quack quack quck!
by Jemia
I used to be able
To purr with them
Just like that!
Whilst a meandering
Down memory lane
I tried purring
But just sounded insane!
Like a bad impersonation
Of Donald Duck
Quack quack quck!
by Jemia
#cats
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter #memories
#LifeAsAWriter #memories
82 reads
0 Comments
Pishashee
Poem Published
25th Feb 2025 4:34pm
25th Feb 2025 4:34pm
Intentionally
I walked in,
down
the
stairs.
And without falling, I said,
"I'm going away now,
I'll finish this
conversation
with myself later."
down
the
stairs.
And without falling, I said,
"I'm going away now,
I'll finish this
conversation
with myself later."
#BestFriend
#funny
126 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
24th Feb 2025 2:04pm
24th Feb 2025 2:04pm
Getting Wet?
I'm chewing away
Like a ruminating cow
That hasn't been milked
For quite a while
A ponder in a pond
A fool in a pool
A commotion in the ocean
The luna in the sea!
A quiver in the river
A quake in a lake
What kind of poem is this?
For goodness sake!
by Jemia
Like a ruminating cow
That hasn't been milked
For quite a while
A ponder in a pond
A fool in a pool
A commotion in the ocean
The luna in the sea!
A quiver in the river
A quake in a lake
What kind of poem is this?
For goodness sake!
by Jemia
#funny
#inspirational
#LifeAsAWriter
#satirical
#WritingPoetry
83 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
23rd Feb 2025 4:30pm
23rd Feb 2025 4:30pm
Pigeon Holed
Oh dear
It's near
To that time of year
When the pigeons
Start performing
Life sex shows
On my balcony! (not an euphemism!)
It's like pigeon pie
In the sky
Coo!
by Jemia
It's near
To that time of year
When the pigeons
Start performing
Life sex shows
On my balcony! (not an euphemism!)
It's like pigeon pie
In the sky
Coo!
by Jemia
#birds
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter #sex
#LifeAsAWriter #sex
70 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
21st Feb 2025 4:24pm
21st Feb 2025 4:24pm
Carrots!
I tried
To0 feed
My rabbit
With a carrot
But in the end
I discovered
That electricity
Was
My rabbits'
Best friend!
by Jemia
To0 feed
My rabbit
With a carrot
But in the end
I discovered
That electricity
Was
My rabbits'
Best friend!
by Jemia
#food
#funny
#satirical #sex
#satirical #sex
68 reads
0 Comments
Rew
Poem Published
21st Feb 2025 7:29am
21st Feb 2025 7:29am
Rew & Prew
I shall dig you up, my Mother,
then lay my body on your bones
and we shall meld with one another
Mother, we shall birth a clone.
My brain's indeed enough for two
your memories are intact
we shall twin again be Rew and Prue
to regain that which we lack.
So lie still Mother, lie easy,
please do not torment me so
although I feel a little queasy
I've not much further to go.
then lay my body on your bones
and we shall meld with one another
Mother, we shall birth a clone.
My brain's indeed enough for two
your memories are intact
we shall twin again be Rew and Prue
to regain that which we lack.
So lie still Mother, lie easy,
please do not torment me so
although I feel a little queasy
I've not much further to go.
#dark
#funny
#rhyming
70 reads
2 Comments
Rew
Poem Published
20th Feb 2025 7:34pm
20th Feb 2025 7:34pm
The last of the Oomegoolie Birds
Though the Oomegoolie bird was well endowed
it made its nest among sharp cacti plants
then caws out oomegoolies very loud,
On return to his nest erect and proud,
to bill and coo to find then squeak, " I can't "
tho' the Oomegoolie bird was well endowed...
So he lived, celibate, not on a cloud
no Ma to confide, no sis, Pa, or aunt
tho' he cawed out oomegoolies very loud,
And no mate to mate that he could've wowed
his world lacked even a sniff of talent ...
it made its nest among sharp cacti plants
then caws out oomegoolies very loud,
On return to his nest erect and proud,
to bill and coo to find then squeak, " I can't "
tho' the Oomegoolie bird was well endowed...
So he lived, celibate, not on a cloud
no Ma to confide, no sis, Pa, or aunt
tho' he cawed out oomegoolies very loud,
And no mate to mate that he could've wowed
his world lacked even a sniff of talent ...
#villanelle
#funny
77 reads
2 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
17th Feb 2025 1:18am
17th Feb 2025 1:18am
The Pond Life MafIa
Ive always wondered
How anyone, or thing
Could be
"Pissed as a newt!"
Does this suggest
As i may digress
That newts
Have an alcohol problem?
Presumably reknowned
For getting inebriated!
Although "pissed" in other countries
Refers to being angry
Which is more disconcerting
As i now live in fear
Of gangs of angry intoxicated newts
Wandering the streets
Both pissed off, and pissed
Like pondlife mafia!
by Jemia
How anyone, or thing
Could be
"Pissed as a newt!"
Does this suggest
As i may digress
That newts
Have an alcohol problem?
Presumably reknowned
For getting inebriated!
Although "pissed" in other countries
Refers to being angry
Which is more disconcerting
As i now live in fear
Of gangs of angry intoxicated newts
Wandering the streets
Both pissed off, and pissed
Like pondlife mafia!
by Jemia
#alcohol
#anger
#funny
#nature
#satirical
70 reads
0 Comments
Indie
Miss Indie
Miss Indie
Poem Published
14th Feb 2025 5:37am
14th Feb 2025 5:37am
just another day (Feb 14)
I spent the day making paper lanterns
and chasing my 4 year old around
pretending they were jellyfish
the sound of his laughter
in the list of top 10 things
I've ever heard
We made an overbaked strawberry cake
for Valentine's Day
drew a jam heart in the centre
before we put it in the oven
it came out looking like a murder scene
so I added maserated strawberries
to try and improve upon it
and perhaps I did
because it now looks like
mushy disemboweled organs
are crawling out of the murder heart ...
and chasing my 4 year old around
pretending they were jellyfish
the sound of his laughter
in the list of top 10 things
I've ever heard
We made an overbaked strawberry cake
for Valentine's Day
drew a jam heart in the centre
before we put it in the oven
it came out looking like a murder scene
so I added maserated strawberries
to try and improve upon it
and perhaps I did
because it now looks like
mushy disemboweled organs
are crawling out of the murder heart ...
#childhood
#children
#family
#funny
#love
114 reads
12 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
13th Feb 2025 00:29am
13th Feb 2025 00:29am
It's Funny
It's funny
I have cider, and red wine
Both collecting dust
But whenever i have mead in the house
Drink it i Must!
It's funny
I don't like honey
In drinks, or on toast
I love it in a pewter goblet
Or a glass at most
It's funny
That i love smoking weed
When drinking mead
That they happen to rhyme
Is a little sublime
It's funny
I imagine a dinosaur
Would find me quite a delight
Full basted in herbs, and honey
I'm sure i'd make a delicious bite!
It's funny
You see ...
I have cider, and red wine
Both collecting dust
But whenever i have mead in the house
Drink it i Must!
It's funny
I don't like honey
In drinks, or on toast
I love it in a pewter goblet
Or a glass at most
It's funny
That i love smoking weed
When drinking mead
That they happen to rhyme
Is a little sublime
It's funny
I imagine a dinosaur
Would find me quite a delight
Full basted in herbs, and honey
I'm sure i'd make a delicious bite!
It's funny
You see ...
#alcohol
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#marijuana
#satirical
62 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Funny Seeking Friendly Advice Poems
