Funny Poetry
#funny
Funny poems to make you laugh. Here you'll find all persuasions of poetic comedy, jokes and humour. This is the place for poetry which doesn't take itself too seriously!
missjem56
Poem Published
Yesterday 8:03pm
Yesterday 8:03pm
Fairy Socks
Ive just observed
Shiny glitter in my socks
Perhaps it is fairy dust
Maybe?
I could leap from my window
Or balcony
And flap my arms
To see
Then explain my experiment
At accident, and emergency
I think for now
I'll assume
They are not socks
With fairy dust
Although i do possess
A liquid
Made by fairies
I know this
As it says so on the bottle
Should'st i drink some?
Or wash up
Some old crocks
Along with the fairy dust
Within my socks?
I once knew a tooth fairy
Her name...
Shiny glitter in my socks
Perhaps it is fairy dust
Maybe?
I could leap from my window
Or balcony
And flap my arms
To see
Then explain my experiment
At accident, and emergency
I think for now
I'll assume
They are not socks
With fairy dust
Although i do possess
A liquid
Made by fairies
I know this
As it says so on the bottle
Should'st i drink some?
Or wash up
Some old crocks
Along with the fairy dust
Within my socks?
I once knew a tooth fairy
Her name...
#funny
#fairies
3 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
23rd Jul 2021 10:24pm
23rd Jul 2021 10:24pm
Powerless
How did people write?
By candlelight
Got four candles
Or fork handles
On the go
It's so dark
I don't really know
That emit
A very pleasant glow
But not enough
To easily see
Without elec tricity
Got some classical
On Radio Three
On my wind-up radio
With no battery
Arms ache
For goodness sake!
by Jemia
By candlelight
Got four candles
Or fork handles
On the go
It's so dark
I don't really know
That emit
A very pleasant glow
But not enough
To easily see
Without elec tricity
Got some classical
On Radio Three
On my wind-up radio
With no battery
Arms ache
For goodness sake!
by Jemia
#power
#funny
#support
9 reads
0 Comments
I_IS_ME
Poem Published
20th Jul 2021 4:48am
20th Jul 2021 4:48am
Animal House
Animals are spending to much time with people and that's a fact
My dog attacked me from the rear trying to commit a sexual act
My cat usually serious thought that this was something to laugh at
While he's rolling around laughing the rats are moving back
Haha my coy fish aren't coy, they are starting to annoy
They are spending more time watching me than they ever did before
The birds outside are always knocking wanting to borrow or come in
Just how many cups of sunflower seeds should a neighbor have to lend
Some one gave me a python...
My dog attacked me from the rear trying to commit a sexual act
My cat usually serious thought that this was something to laugh at
While he's rolling around laughing the rats are moving back
Haha my coy fish aren't coy, they are starting to annoy
They are spending more time watching me than they ever did before
The birds outside are always knocking wanting to borrow or come in
Just how many cups of sunflower seeds should a neighbor have to lend
Some one gave me a python...
#relationships
#conflict
#animals #funny
#animals #funny
27 reads
5 Comments
Gahddess_Worship
Poem Published
20th Jul 2021 3:28am
20th Jul 2021 3:28am
21st Century Pantomime
Thought filled lips moving
cyber-crowd gesticulates
hey, you are on mute!
cyber-crowd gesticulates
hey, you are on mute!
#LifeStruggles
#silence
#funny #dialogue
#funny #dialogue
23 reads
11 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
18th Jul 2021 2:32pm
18th Jul 2021 2:32pm
The Hungry Hippo
I spent to much time
Of my life
In de Nile
And eventually
Got eaten
By de hippo!
by Jemia
Of my life
In de Nile
And eventually
Got eaten
By de hippo!
by Jemia
#funny
7 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
16th Jul 2021 2:55pm
16th Jul 2021 2:55pm
An Invisible Parrot
I espy
Three people wandering around
through the busy hubbub
Of the Old Town
They have four parrots
Perched, upon their shoulders
I hope they don't poo
Anything that smoulders
"Give me a gottle of geer!"
Said an invisible parrot
In my right ear
I leapt from my seat
Much alarmed
And checked myself
But remained unharmed
Not wanting to be seen
Talking
To an invisible parrot
That was now squawking
That no-one else could hear
This invisible parrot
Squawking in my ear
"It's okay" said the...
Three people wandering around
through the busy hubbub
Of the Old Town
They have four parrots
Perched, upon their shoulders
I hope they don't poo
Anything that smoulders
"Give me a gottle of geer!"
Said an invisible parrot
In my right ear
I leapt from my seat
Much alarmed
And checked myself
But remained unharmed
Not wanting to be seen
Talking
To an invisible parrot
That was now squawking
That no-one else could hear
This invisible parrot
Squawking in my ear
"It's okay" said the...
#birds
#funny
#surreal
7 reads
1 Comment
slipalong
Poem Published
16th Jul 2021 10:00am
16th Jul 2021 10:00am
The flock
The farmer sent me, to count sheep
for I had dozed and fell asleep
for they had passed the bleating flock
and I awoke in a state of shock
for my friend Olivia
for I had dozed and fell asleep
for they had passed the bleating flock
and I awoke in a state of shock
for my friend Olivia
#funny
15 reads
2 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
15th Jul 2021 1:28pm
15th Jul 2021 1:28pm
Thoughtless Silence
I had been lost in thought
And had just been thinking
That today was a very noisy day
So switched off my brain
And stopped thinking for a few moments
And was met with
Silence
It was then
That i realised
How busy
My brain had been
I could almost hear it
Clank!
by Jemia
And had just been thinking
That today was a very noisy day
So switched off my brain
And stopped thinking for a few moments
And was met with
Silence
It was then
That i realised
How busy
My brain had been
I could almost hear it
Clank!
by Jemia
#funny
#SelfReflection
#SelfDiscovery
15 reads
1 Comment
missjem56
Poem Published
15th Jul 2021 12:34pm
15th Jul 2021 12:34pm
Ails Of A Troll
Currently coughing
Something in my throat
Could be a hairy Hare
Or maybe ive swallowed a goat!
by Jemia
Something in my throat
Could be a hairy Hare
Or maybe ive swallowed a goat!
by Jemia
#funny
#surreal
11 reads
0 Comments
wallyroo92
Poem Published
14th Jul 2021 00:01am
14th Jul 2021 00:01am
Analinguistics: The Art of Fart Box Tongue Punching
#lust
#sex
#erotic
#funny
#dirty
102 reads
2 Comments
RoscoeForthright
Poem Published
12th Jul 2021 7:39pm
12th Jul 2021 7:39pm
Three Cumshots
#inspirational
#spiritual
#satirical #funny
#satirical #funny
119 reads
missjem56
Poem Published
12th Jul 2021 5:26pm
12th Jul 2021 5:26pm
What A Hoot!
The owl, and the pussycat
Went to sea
Why?
It's a mystery to me
Hoot went the owl
And meow went the cat
As they sat on an ocean
Ever so flat
Off they drifted
In the deep blue sea
They had a wonderful time
But nowhere to pee
So they pulled out the cork
Of their pea-green boat
To their horror
Were no longer afloat!
But that's another story
So i won't take it to far
As they abandon the boat
And opt for a car
The owl, and the pussycat
Instead, went for a drive ...
Went to sea
Why?
It's a mystery to me
Hoot went the owl
And meow went the cat
As they sat on an ocean
Ever so flat
Off they drifted
In the deep blue sea
They had a wonderful time
But nowhere to pee
So they pulled out the cork
Of their pea-green boat
To their horror
Were no longer afloat!
But that's another story
So i won't take it to far
As they abandon the boat
And opt for a car
The owl, and the pussycat
Instead, went for a drive ...
#inspirational
#funny
#surreal
21 reads
1 Comment
DU Poetry : Funny Poetry
