Popular Funny Poems
#funny
Popular funny poems. Poems are listed in order of their popularity this month.
Grace
IDryad
IDryad
Poem Published
27th Mar 2024 11:50am
27th Mar 2024 11:50am
Deep Underground Community
(without fear or favour)
written in shared ink-stained dreams
shared where words dance in creative
woven tapestry of ethereal canvas
the unions of souls can be found
the whispered promises of love
entanglement in earthy passions
shared transcend the physical
as they are puffs of smoke
creative and heartfelt it may sound
they are born of mere words
for in deep underground
nothing is what they seem
surrender to the realm where poems reign
let us weave our tale verses entwine
creating...
written in shared ink-stained dreams
shared where words dance in creative
woven tapestry of ethereal canvas
the unions of souls can be found
the whispered promises of love
entanglement in earthy passions
shared transcend the physical
as they are puffs of smoke
creative and heartfelt it may sound
they are born of mere words
for in deep underground
nothing is what they seem
surrender to the realm where poems reign
let us weave our tale verses entwine
creating...
#funny
#WritingPoetry
#SelfReflection
112 reads
14 Comments
faithmairee
Poem Published
7th Apr 2024 7:01pm
7th Apr 2024 7:01pm
Honestly, A Bean?
I'm not an empress
Nor a queen
Perhaps, I'm
somewhere
In-between
I'm glad I wasn't
Born a lima bean
In a pot ready
To be steamed
Or maybe, look
Like someone's spleen
There's many things
I'm glad I'm not
Like someone's
Dirty, smelly sock
A cavity or
A lonesome rock
Or a luscious apple
Left to simply rot
It really seems
I'm grateful
For a lot of things
But in the end I'm
Glad I'm me
Living quietly
And so serene
Reveling in...
Nor a queen
Perhaps, I'm
somewhere
In-between
I'm glad I wasn't
Born a lima bean
In a pot ready
To be steamed
Or maybe, look
Like someone's spleen
There's many things
I'm glad I'm not
Like someone's
Dirty, smelly sock
A cavity or
A lonesome rock
Or a luscious apple
Left to simply rot
It really seems
I'm grateful
For a lot of things
But in the end I'm
Glad I'm me
Living quietly
And so serene
Reveling in...
#inspirational
#funny
#uplifting
71 reads
9 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
12th Apr 2024 12:42pm
12th Apr 2024 12:42pm
Pervert in my cellar
#sex
#rhyming
#funny
#SelfDiscovery
#orgasm
94 reads
15 Comments
wallyroo92
Poem Published
18th Mar 2024 5:14am
18th Mar 2024 5:14am
Come at Me Bro!
The Great Decapod Crustacean War
General Clawdius Herman Shellby Pincer VIII stood on the rock
He had come from a long line of warriors since the Jurassic era
His family were more defined by their extra thick exoskeletons
Their species are one the longest living creatures on planet Terra
An army of a million crabs had gathered there in the ocean floor
Ready to go to war as General Pincer VIII encouraged the troops
He spoke to platoons, sergeants, chieftains, captains and crabtains
Advising that the enemy is fast and catches them in groups ...
General Clawdius Herman Shellby Pincer VIII stood on the rock
He had come from a long line of warriors since the Jurassic era
His family were more defined by their extra thick exoskeletons
Their species are one the longest living creatures on planet Terra
An army of a million crabs had gathered there in the ocean floor
Ready to go to war as General Pincer VIII encouraged the troops
He spoke to platoons, sergeants, chieftains, captains and crabtains
Advising that the enemy is fast and catches them in groups ...
#animals
#nature
#narrative #funny
#narrative #funny
101 reads
9 Comments
wallyroo92
Poem Published
23rd Mar 2024 7:52pm
23rd Mar 2024 7:52pm
Dutch Oven
I hear, the gases that you keep…
When you’re fartin’ in your sleep”
(So Romantic)
She told me that this morning
(Yeah, she got jokes too)
Then she let me have it
The whole truth and nothing butt
Now I don’t feel ass charming
Here I thought
If I kept it quiet and not toot around her
I was keeping some kind of mystery
Turns out in my sleep my Annie has been a suffering
(Is she OK?)
Talk about Misery
“You’ve Dutch Oven’d me countless times”
She said with...
When you’re fartin’ in your sleep”
(So Romantic)
She told me that this morning
(Yeah, she got jokes too)
Then she let me have it
The whole truth and nothing butt
Now I don’t feel ass charming
Here I thought
If I kept it quiet and not toot around her
I was keeping some kind of mystery
Turns out in my sleep my Annie has been a suffering
(Is she OK?)
Talk about Misery
“You’ve Dutch Oven’d me countless times”
She said with...
#love
#wife
#funny
110 reads
9 Comments
Pinkdreams
Poem Published
24th Mar 2024 2:48am
24th Mar 2024 2:48am
Wiener Walk
I bend down to pet the dachshund
because dog
The owner nods her approval
Aww, what a sweetie
my standard sincere statement
about any canine
who doesn't bare its' fangs
and sever tendons in my wrist
He just went for a wiener walk!
the 40-ish blonde woman tells me
Oh...
so, a walk with other dachshunds?
Did I really need to ask that?
Yes,
blonde 40 confirms
He had fun
but it doesn't take long for him to get tired
Yeah, like the men in the age group I'm...
because dog
The owner nods her approval
Aww, what a sweetie
my standard sincere statement
about any canine
who doesn't bare its' fangs
and sever tendons in my wrist
He just went for a wiener walk!
the 40-ish blonde woman tells me
Oh...
so, a walk with other dachshunds?
Did I really need to ask that?
Yes,
blonde 40 confirms
He had fun
but it doesn't take long for him to get tired
Yeah, like the men in the age group I'm...
#dogs
#funny
100 reads
5 Comments
wallyroo92
Poem Published
16th Mar 2024 10:20pm
16th Mar 2024 10:20pm
Facebook Memories
2016 – August
While watching Being Human (a show about a Vampire, a Werewolf and a Ghost)
Me: Babe, if a vampire offered you eternal life…
Wife: YES!
Me: Just like that huh? You’d watch me get old and die?
Wife: BYE FELICIA!
2015 – September
Showing the boys Naked Gun 2 ½. Lt. Frank Drebin helps me explain the birds and the bees
Xavier (11): What? I don’t get it
Xander (10): I don’t get it either
(A hot dog lands on a bun on screen)
Both: Ooh! I GET IT
Me: It’s the artistic portion of the...
While watching Being Human (a show about a Vampire, a Werewolf and a Ghost)
Me: Babe, if a vampire offered you eternal life…
Wife: YES!
Me: Just like that huh? You’d watch me get old and die?
Wife: BYE FELICIA!
2015 – September
Showing the boys Naked Gun 2 ½. Lt. Frank Drebin helps me explain the birds and the bees
Xavier (11): What? I don’t get it
Xander (10): I don’t get it either
(A hot dog lands on a bun on screen)
Both: Ooh! I GET IT
Me: It’s the artistic portion of the...
#children
#family
#funny #memories
#funny #memories
84 reads
7 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
11th Apr 2024 11:26am
11th Apr 2024 11:26am
Andy Kaufman...Genius
Insisted he wasn't a comedian, jokes he hated
A song & dance man, he has often stated
Early comedy clubs thought he was a hack
Foreign man revealed, they wanted him back
First season of Saturday Night Live
Mighty Mouse performed, in 1975
Elvis impersonation was well respected
Flawless in delivery, absolute perfection
Latka Gravas introduced on taxi, a TV show
Tony Clifton was Andy, in case you didn't know
Jerry Lawler brought him to Memphis
Andy's character was smug & pretentious
Wrestling...
A song & dance man, he has often stated
Early comedy clubs thought he was a hack
Foreign man revealed, they wanted him back
First season of Saturday Night Live
Mighty Mouse performed, in 1975
Elvis impersonation was well respected
Flawless in delivery, absolute perfection
Latka Gravas introduced on taxi, a TV show
Tony Clifton was Andy, in case you didn't know
Jerry Lawler brought him to Memphis
Andy's character was smug & pretentious
Wrestling...
#rhyming
#funny
#admiration
#respect
#nonfiction
43 reads
10 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
20th Mar 2024 8:06pm
20th Mar 2024 8:06pm
Perverted PA
#erotic
#America
#funny
#dirty
#passion
141 reads
11 Comments
WillowsWhimsies
Poem Published
29th Mar 2024 2:10pm
29th Mar 2024 2:10pm
rearview rumination
baby, that ass of yours is a thing to behold
yeah...so I've been told
your pardon...please
I have so few vanities
& it's so rare that I actually indulge them
but this one thing...
allow me to own it
my absolute best asset
since my youth...it's been the truth
stopping men in their tracks
& pivoting on their toes
just to get a second glance
daring to butt in on my thoughts
as I walked...
they made noise behind me
bet your bottom dollar
it was the one honest response I ever got from them ...
yeah...so I've been told
your pardon...please
I have so few vanities
& it's so rare that I actually indulge them
but this one thing...
allow me to own it
my absolute best asset
since my youth...it's been the truth
stopping men in their tracks
& pivoting on their toes
just to get a second glance
daring to butt in on my thoughts
as I walked...
they made noise behind me
bet your bottom dollar
it was the one honest response I ever got from them ...
#funny
#confessional
96 reads
8 Comments
Samnash
Sam Nash
Sam Nash
Poem Published
9th Apr 2024 11:48pm
9th Apr 2024 11:48pm
Zapped
#sex
#erotic
#BDSM #funny
#BDSM #funny
130 reads
8 Comments
Kinkwizard_95
Poem Published
22nd Mar 2024 11:23pm
22nd Mar 2024 11:23pm
Dr Feral
#sex
#funny
#myself
#dirty
#surreal
126 reads
3 Comments
DU Poetry : Popular Funny Poems
