Discovering

 
When I was a little girl,
I always wished that I was a boy.
I wasn’t a boy,
but I wasn’t very girly either.

I was proud to be a tomboy.
And then one day
the word androgyny
was added to my vocabulary.

I still struggled to find my identity
throughout my teens,
intent on indulging
the darkness.

Boys continued to break my heart,
and then...

I fell deeply in love with a girl.
But I was too afraid to tell her,
and our paths
tragically parted.

I thought about her for 10 long years,
while suffering the consequences
of empty promises
from a man.

But then in a burst of damnation
from deep within my soul,
I left him... I was free

And she found me,
and she told me...
she loved me too.

My world turned upside down,
and now I am so eager to live my life!

In my heart I could always see us:
together
walking casually through fields of ferns,
the sunlight reflecting our love...

And now the time has finally come;
it feels like the first day of my life!

For the first time,
I suddenly know
what it feels like

to be alive.