Submissions by nightbirdblue (enbyblue)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
I am fluid polygender, identifying as both “she/her” & ”they/them” • Panromantic and married to the love of my life! 🏳️🌈 Poetry on mental illness, spirituality, LGBTQIA2+ experiences, and surviving DV.
Clear My Plate
Still wilting
Over obsession
It’s my confession
I long for bones
To protrude, to show
That you’re so fkn rude
What you make me do
Starving for self worth
For what I deserve
I would eat for you
But rib cage and sinew
Are all that you prove
With lilting desires
Tongue is on fire
What I ache for now
I crave for you now
To clear my plate
To placate my
Unending lust
For anorexia
I would abandon
All logic and reason
But that’s for
Another season
I’ve another reason
Now to...
Over obsession
It’s my confession
I long for bones
To protrude, to show
That you’re so fkn rude
What you make me do
Starving for self worth
For what I deserve
I would eat for you
But rib cage and sinew
Are all that you prove
With lilting desires
Tongue is on fire
What I ache for now
I crave for you now
To clear my plate
To placate my
Unending lust
For anorexia
I would abandon
All logic and reason
But that’s for
Another season
I’ve another reason
Now to...
#lust
#confessional
#addiction
#EatingDisorder
#obsession
123 reads
0 Comments
Affirmations
My actions match my values
My values match my morals
I am ready to put the past behind me
I can be a new me, the next level
I can live authentic to my heart
I am ready to grow up
I believe in me
I trust my instincts
I can be self confident
I have valuable skills
I can overcome self sabotage
I deserve better
I am worth more
I am not my mistakes
I have meaningful relationships
I am deeply loved
I love myself as I am
I admire and nourish my body
I am proud of me
I can do...
My values match my morals
I am ready to put the past behind me
I can be a new me, the next level
I can live authentic to my heart
I am ready to grow up
I believe in me
I trust my instincts
I can be self confident
I have valuable skills
I can overcome self sabotage
I deserve better
I am worth more
I am not my mistakes
I have meaningful relationships
I am deeply loved
I love myself as I am
I admire and nourish my body
I am proud of me
I can do...
#hope
#courage
#motivational
#uplifting
#determination
122 reads
8 Comments
Black Tar Lung
Still coughing up
A black tar lung
Ink stains blot
My choking tongue
Quill races by
My mind’s undone
No fear of death
I’ve been expunged
Like alchemy
We’re having fun
But not quite like
When I was young
Matured respite
A refined hunt
Each letter penned
With dripping lust
Aging beauty
Hair like rust
I crave response
I crave your touch
A black tar lung
Ink stains blot
My choking tongue
Quill races by
My mind’s undone
No fear of death
I’ve been expunged
Like alchemy
We’re having fun
But not quite like
When I was young
Matured respite
A refined hunt
Each letter penned
With dripping lust
Aging beauty
Hair like rust
I crave response
I crave your touch
#jealousy
#lust
#rhyming
#LifeAsAWriter
#determination
94 reads
0 Comments
Dark Days
I’m so bored most days.
Most days I can’t find the will
to care about much of anything.
How did this happen?
I just don’t care about anything anymore.
I lie, cheat, and steal. I feel terrible about it
but then I do it anyway bc I just don’t care.
I don’t care about my job,
chores, sex, art, poetry, my health.
I just don’t care anymore.
I’m so disconnected and I hate every minute of it.
Every day just waiting for the time to pass by
so that the day can be over again.
Just to repeat it...
Most days I can’t find the will
to care about much of anything.
How did this happen?
I just don’t care about anything anymore.
I lie, cheat, and steal. I feel terrible about it
but then I do it anyway bc I just don’t care.
I don’t care about my job,
chores, sex, art, poetry, my health.
I just don’t care anymore.
I’m so disconnected and I hate every minute of it.
Every day just waiting for the time to pass by
so that the day can be over again.
Just to repeat it...
#sadness
#depression
#MentalHealth
#emptiness
#boredom
106 reads
2 Comments
Mother’s Day
You laid a path for me to follow
Though sometimes life can be hard to swallow
But you were there to hold my hand
And encourage me to step off the beaten path
You painted a world alive and green
And helped open my blue eyes to see
On this day now I recognize
Your caring influence in my life
Now I walk fast while you walk slow
But by this you still teach me how to grow
And with your age you will see
There’s still a child holding your hand…
…that’s me 🥰
Though sometimes life can be hard to swallow
But you were there to hold my hand
And encourage me to step off the beaten path
You painted a world alive and green
And helped open my blue eyes to see
On this day now I recognize
Your caring influence in my life
Now I walk fast while you walk slow
But by this you still teach me how to grow
And with your age you will see
There’s still a child holding your hand…
…that’s me 🥰
#mother
#gratitude
#support
#admiration
#respect
130 reads
3 Comments
Thee Madd Poetist
not unlike thee madd scientist
can be found painting raw amethyst
scattering verb like skilled ventriloquists
seeing the world in rays of ultraviolet
pushing the limits, the antagonist
is ever questioning if we exist
seeking purity as a naturalist
and blending words as an alchemist
that form thoughts of a nonconformist
wondering if we can really coexist
in a world ran by violent anarchists
afterall, we’re all just boring tourists
seeking the monuments of the quest
so don’t think of me as a terrorist
for I am not a published...
can be found painting raw amethyst
scattering verb like skilled ventriloquists
seeing the world in rays of ultraviolet
pushing the limits, the antagonist
is ever questioning if we exist
seeking purity as a naturalist
and blending words as an alchemist
that form thoughts of a nonconformist
wondering if we can really coexist
in a world ran by violent anarchists
afterall, we’re all just boring tourists
seeking the monuments of the quest
so don’t think of me as a terrorist
for I am not a published...
#rhyming
#LifeAsAWriter
#WritingPoetry
#PowerOfWords
#philosophical
139 reads
2 Comments
Winter’s Thaw
frigid
night air
pierces
new holes
through
my heart
it’s the start
of spring
birds sing
last year’s
crisp leaves
graze the
frozen ground
with a sound
like dry brush
strokes
that evoke
all the senses
wind is reckless
a painted canvas
of neon sunset
hangs overhead
chitter chatter
can be heard
from chipmunks’
holes
stretch my toes
bugs buzz
around
our home
but it’s still
a bit too cold
for flowers’
arrival
their survival ...
night air
pierces
new holes
through
my heart
it’s the start
of spring
birds sing
last year’s
crisp leaves
graze the
frozen ground
with a sound
like dry brush
strokes
that evoke
all the senses
wind is reckless
a painted canvas
of neon sunset
hangs overhead
chitter chatter
can be heard
from chipmunks’
holes
stretch my toes
bugs buzz
around
our home
but it’s still
a bit too cold
for flowers’
arrival
their survival ...
#home
#winter
#spring
#rebirth
#pagan
194 reads
3 Comments
Seeking Grace
With a Peer by your side
You have a trusted guide
Someone who’s taken
A similar path and survived
To tell inspiring stories
Of struggle and strife
To shed a hopeful light
Upon the stigmas of life
Chronic mental illness
Does not define us
And substance use is
More than meets the eye
So bring us your weary
Your timid, your bleak
We will rise up together
No longer defeated
The opposite of addiction
Is connection, so they say
And as a Peer, I am here ...
You have a trusted guide
Someone who’s taken
A similar path and survived
To tell inspiring stories
Of struggle and strife
To shed a hopeful light
Upon the stigmas of life
Chronic mental illness
Does not define us
And substance use is
More than meets the eye
So bring us your weary
Your timid, your bleak
We will rise up together
No longer defeated
The opposite of addiction
Is connection, so they say
And as a Peer, I am here ...
#kindness
#hope
#uplifting
#gratitude
#support
210 reads
5 Comments
An Addict’s Sermon

#addiction
#MentalHealth
#support
#suffering
#temptation
185 reads
0 Comments
No Deity Dare Break Us
We’ll haunt this home
With memories of love
No deity dare break us
Or rattle our bones
Our breath still lingers
Where we traced our fingers
Over shuttered windows
With a cryptic message
You can’t smudge us away
Our passion burns every day
Stoking up weary flames
In the crumbling fireplace
Lo’ this home we’ve claimed
With an infinite embrace
So when you leave, remember
Leave the light on, forever
With Love,
Dearly Departed
With memories of love
No deity dare break us
Or rattle our bones
Our breath still lingers
Where we traced our fingers
Over shuttered windows
With a cryptic message
You can’t smudge us away
Our passion burns every day
Stoking up weary flames
In the crumbling fireplace
Lo’ this home we’ve claimed
With an infinite embrace
So when you leave, remember
Leave the light on, forever
With Love,
Dearly Departed
#ghosts
#pagan
#magic
#witches
#curse
164 reads
0 Comments
EMDR Sets
I used to be numb to this memory
Although I knew that watching
Mum run outside to call 911
Held the most intense emotion
Other than actually seeing Brother
Push Dad down the flight of stairs
Still, in memory it was all rather sterile
Yet now in EMDR, I’m becoming feral
——————————————————
Little A’ was scared
Confused and helpless and
Even though Big Sis was there
I had no one to hold my hand
I felt desperately alone
I was staring off, staring down
Silenced by the weight ...
Although I knew that watching
Mum run outside to call 911
Held the most intense emotion
Other than actually seeing Brother
Push Dad down the flight of stairs
Still, in memory it was all rather sterile
Yet now in EMDR, I’m becoming feral
——————————————————
Little A’ was scared
Confused and helpless and
Even though Big Sis was there
I had no one to hold my hand
I felt desperately alone
I was staring off, staring down
Silenced by the weight ...
#loneliness
#silence
#memories
#PTSD
#DomesticViolence
212 reads
2 Comments
The Monsters In My Head
once
upon a time
I was
reminiscing
of a dark
red wine
brimming with
exhilaration
and hysterics
our warmed cheeks
and blushing skin
pressed together
but the recreation
asks explicitly
of my repressions
and sudden bursts
of emotion, of insecurity
overwhelm into
repetitious processes
of both speech and thought that
becomes into picking
hard off, eyes are looking
to one direction
head twisted, swiveled
while feeling the...
upon a time
I was
reminiscing
of a dark
red wine
brimming with
exhilaration
and hysterics
our warmed cheeks
and blushing skin
pressed together
but the recreation
asks explicitly
of my repressions
and sudden bursts
of emotion, of insecurity
overwhelm into
repetitious processes
of both speech and thought that
becomes into picking
hard off, eyes are looking
to one direction
head twisted, swiveled
while feeling the...
#courage
#sex
#alcohol
#MentalHealth
#PTSD
261 reads
7 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by nightbirdblue (enbyblue)