I am in such anguish that I could die
eswaller
Forum Posts: 762
Dangerous Mind
31
Joined 22nd Dec 2015Forum Posts: 762
Happiness Over Anguish
I first thought that there would never be someone like you ever again,
Even when you were the one who ripped my heart out and walked all
Over it. It was when I poured my heart out and all you did was shut
Down with no more words spoken until there was no more rain
Or tears left I realized I was done. This was my last time as the wall
Was closing in and firm. By then it was too late because as my gut
Feeling was twisted and squirmy like a worm it led me the right
Way as I walked the other way and towards the sun. I could anguish
Over the decision I knew was coming or I can be glad that I made it
When I did as you are trying to sneak your way back in with the light.
I could choose to sit and wallow in my sadness. I could languish
Over someone who is gone or I can move the fuck on where I fit
In the correct spot with someone else who realizes my worth from
Day one. You do not have the power to make me feel that numb.
Even when you were the one who ripped my heart out and walked all
Over it. It was when I poured my heart out and all you did was shut
Down with no more words spoken until there was no more rain
Or tears left I realized I was done. This was my last time as the wall
Was closing in and firm. By then it was too late because as my gut
Feeling was twisted and squirmy like a worm it led me the right
Way as I walked the other way and towards the sun. I could anguish
Over the decision I knew was coming or I can be glad that I made it
When I did as you are trying to sneak your way back in with the light.
I could choose to sit and wallow in my sadness. I could languish
Over someone who is gone or I can move the fuck on where I fit
In the correct spot with someone else who realizes my worth from
Day one. You do not have the power to make me feel that numb.
Written by eswaller
Go To Page
ReggiePoet
Reggie
Forum Posts: 363
Reggie
Fire of Insight
28
Joined 13th May 2018Forum Posts: 363
Anonymous
Related submission no longer exists.
LunaLove6963
Forum Posts: 1347
Dangerous Mind
3
Joined 14th Jan 2016Forum Posts: 1347
Silently Screaming
Not that anyone could guess
I'm a fucking mess
On the outside I'm just like the rest
But inside I'm a wreck
I wear my mask quite well
Even though my mind puts me through hell
I'm beaten down and broken
Words often unspoken
Depression
Anxiety
And a longing for so much more
They all say life is an open door
So why can't I open it?
Long ago I feel into this pit
I don't know that I'll ever be able to climb out
Because no one can hear
even at the top of my lungs a silent scream
I shout!
I'm a fucking mess
On the outside I'm just like the rest
But inside I'm a wreck
I wear my mask quite well
Even though my mind puts me through hell
I'm beaten down and broken
Words often unspoken
Depression
Anxiety
And a longing for so much more
They all say life is an open door
So why can't I open it?
Long ago I feel into this pit
I don't know that I'll ever be able to climb out
Because no one can hear
even at the top of my lungs a silent scream
I shout!
Written by LunaLove6963
Go To Page
LunaLove6963
Forum Posts: 1347
Dangerous Mind
3
Joined 14th Jan 2016Forum Posts: 1347
Silently Suffering
Sitting here
Silently suffering
Waiting
Wishing
Over thinking
There is really only one thing keeping me here
Maybe I should just disappear
Even tho I am here
I'm really not
Running away
my only thought
Sitting here in such despair
Silently suffering
Without a sound
I'm screaming
... save me!
Silently suffering
Waiting
Wishing
Over thinking
There is really only one thing keeping me here
Maybe I should just disappear
Even tho I am here
I'm really not
Running away
my only thought
Sitting here in such despair
Silently suffering
Without a sound
I'm screaming
... save me!
Written by LunaLove6963
Go To Page
gazellemon
Bradley J
Forum Posts: 372
Bradley J
Fire of Insight
6
Joined 6th Mar 2014Forum Posts: 372
Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Forum Posts: 5134
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
154
Joined 9th Nov 2015 Forum Posts: 5134
Urn
"And now it seems to me the beautiful uncut hair of graves". -Walt Whitman
As ashes drift by overhead
From chimney stack a mile away,
I slowly walk the parapet
That circles marker, stone & grave.
There are no tears belong to me
With all my grief contained within
When soon the coming rain will be.
For now I hold here in my hands
An urn of cradled numb entombed
As empty as are all my sins,
Of phantom ache of phantom womb.
A mounting pall makes all things plain
And gives complexion to the dead
Who pace among the dates & names
To find a mother for my son.
While stillborn thunder's lightning rod
Of blinding flash that now ordains
The sudden pitch of driving rains.
It is for me while lain among
The faery buds & feathered grass
As natural for an urn to spend
Of time eternal till I pass.
As ashes drift by overhead
From chimney stack a mile away,
I slowly walk the parapet
That circles marker, stone & grave.
There are no tears belong to me
With all my grief contained within
When soon the coming rain will be.
For now I hold here in my hands
An urn of cradled numb entombed
As empty as are all my sins,
Of phantom ache of phantom womb.
A mounting pall makes all things plain
And gives complexion to the dead
Who pace among the dates & names
To find a mother for my son.
While stillborn thunder's lightning rod
Of blinding flash that now ordains
The sudden pitch of driving rains.
It is for me while lain among
The faery buds & feathered grass
As natural for an urn to spend
Of time eternal till I pass.
Written by Jade-Pandora
(jade tiger)
Go To Page
wallyroo92
Forum Posts: 1858
Tyrant of Words
153
Joined 11th July 2012Forum Posts: 1858
The Lord Taketh Away
The earth shook and the oceans rose,
The waters swept everything away,
And like everyone he ran for his life,
Not knowing this would be their grave.
In the aftermath of the disaster,
Countless lives were lost and gone,
And in the efforts to find survivors,
A man sits on the road withdrawn.
And there, as rescue vehicles drive past,
People watch the old man on his knees,
As he cries out to all of heaven and earth,
Sobbing to the Almighty to hear his pleas.
“My wife, my children,
Everyone I loved is gone,
Why have I been left behind?
Lord please take me” he went on.
I’d never seen sorrow or pain on a man,
On the street as he painfully bereaved,
Everything he ever knew was now gone,
On the side of the road he deeply grieved.
“Why am I the only one left?” he repeated,
“Lord please take me” he wept resigned,
“Everyone I ever loved is gone” he bellowed,
From his soul he sobbed “why am I left behind?”
The earth shook and the oceans rose,
The waters swept everything away,
And like everyone he ran for his life,
Not knowing this would be their grave.
In the aftermath of the disaster,
Countless lives were lost and gone,
And in the efforts to find survivors,
A man sits on the road withdrawn.
And there, as rescue vehicles drive past,
People watch the old man on his knees,
As he cries out to all of heaven and earth,
Sobbing to the Almighty to hear his pleas.
“My wife, my children,
Everyone I loved is gone,
Why have I been left behind?
Lord please take me” he went on.
I’d never seen sorrow or pain on a man,
On the street as he painfully bereaved,
Everything he ever knew was now gone,
On the side of the road he deeply grieved.
“Why am I the only one left?” he repeated,
“Lord please take me” he wept resigned,
“Everyone I ever loved is gone” he bellowed,
From his soul he sobbed “why am I left behind?”
Northern1
Joined 15th Apr 2016
Forum Posts: 233
Fire of Insight
Forum Posts: 233
Bleak
i am so sad and i don't know why
something good has passed me by
and every thought within my head
is poisoned by a pitch black dread
i am so tired and i cannot sleep
my anguish is intense and deep
and thinking of it i have observed
something inside say it's deserved
i am so bewildered am feeling ill
i swear it's all against my will
i want to break free into the light
but feel too weak to put up a fight
i am so afraid that i will fail
to escape out of this awful jail
pray to God to give me strength
and help me go to any length
something good has passed me by
and every thought within my head
is poisoned by a pitch black dread
i am so tired and i cannot sleep
my anguish is intense and deep
and thinking of it i have observed
something inside say it's deserved
i am so bewildered am feeling ill
i swear it's all against my will
i want to break free into the light
but feel too weak to put up a fight
i am so afraid that i will fail
to escape out of this awful jail
pray to God to give me strength
and help me go to any length
Written by Northern1
Go To Page
Battle Rages Within
Erotic thoughts fill my head
Stream out through my fingers
Onto the pure white page
Beautiful words? Or, inappropriate lurid stains?
Is it wrong to find another female form alluring?
Are not the sensual curves just as beautiful?
The pleasure of consummated love as powerful?
Have I no concept of propriety and self control?
Is my true self awakened?
As Smeagol cum Gollum
I am racked with the pain of duplicity
Seemingly destined to destroy what is precious
The incessant battle rages on
In another context
She labels me a “sick son of a bitch”
Words that tear at my soul
One part cruel condemnation of a saintly mother
The other truth
Simple surrender is the answer
Fighting for both sides becomes impossible
A sacrifice must be made
The “who am I?” question answered
Stream out through my fingers
Onto the pure white page
Beautiful words? Or, inappropriate lurid stains?
Is it wrong to find another female form alluring?
Are not the sensual curves just as beautiful?
The pleasure of consummated love as powerful?
Have I no concept of propriety and self control?
Is my true self awakened?
As Smeagol cum Gollum
I am racked with the pain of duplicity
Seemingly destined to destroy what is precious
The incessant battle rages on
In another context
She labels me a “sick son of a bitch”
Words that tear at my soul
One part cruel condemnation of a saintly mother
The other truth
Simple surrender is the answer
Fighting for both sides becomes impossible
A sacrifice must be made
The “who am I?” question answered
Written by Gahddess_Worship
(Osomajestuoso)
Go To Page
NO HARM DONE
Follow me
I’ll bring you to my pusher
with a pssssst down an alley way
he doesn’t call to me
I walk brazenly into his store
where I also happen to purchase
a fuel fix for my car
My mouth waters
greeted with panoply of possibilities
to sate my vice
do I crave chips or cheese puffs
perhaps a candy bar or two or three
life wouldn’t be in balance
without a package of cookies
oh and I can’t forget my protein
beef jerky presented in all varieties
mmmmm I’m feeling better already
Now what to wash it down with
in this I am so sensible
I always select soda pop
that is sugar-free or nearly so
these magic beverages
nullify any of the harmful effects
of my other snack choices
I can be so damn smart sometimes
Location, location, location
where to consume my sweet ‘n’ salty hoard
I’ll start small in the car on the way home
that takes 2 minutes
sneak the rest past familiar security
to the safety and acceptance of my bedroom
fire up the laptop
watch my favorite shows online
or perhaps write some poetry
while slipping into a junk-food orgasm
my sumptuous habit won't kill me
at least not tonight
I’ll bring you to my pusher
with a pssssst down an alley way
he doesn’t call to me
I walk brazenly into his store
where I also happen to purchase
a fuel fix for my car
My mouth waters
greeted with panoply of possibilities
to sate my vice
do I crave chips or cheese puffs
perhaps a candy bar or two or three
life wouldn’t be in balance
without a package of cookies
oh and I can’t forget my protein
beef jerky presented in all varieties
mmmmm I’m feeling better already
Now what to wash it down with
in this I am so sensible
I always select soda pop
that is sugar-free or nearly so
these magic beverages
nullify any of the harmful effects
of my other snack choices
I can be so damn smart sometimes
Location, location, location
where to consume my sweet ‘n’ salty hoard
I’ll start small in the car on the way home
that takes 2 minutes
sneak the rest past familiar security
to the safety and acceptance of my bedroom
fire up the laptop
watch my favorite shows online
or perhaps write some poetry
while slipping into a junk-food orgasm
my sumptuous habit won't kill me
at least not tonight
Written by Gahddess_Worship
(Osomajestuoso)
Go To Page
LunasChild8
Forum Posts: 540
Dangerous Mind
21
Joined 27th Dec 2017 Forum Posts: 540
Thank you so much for the winning position! Congratulations to the runner-ups, Missy and Reggie for their terrific work. Kudos to everyone else for participating and sharing their work. c:
Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Forum Posts: 5134
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
154
Joined 9th Nov 2015 Forum Posts: 5134
Omg Luna, lovely light... CONGRATULATIONS!, I had a feeling all week that something was going to happen for you, you’ve been right on the cusp!
I’m so excited - the competition brought out wonderful writes from so many... and my congratulations to Missy & Reggie!
All the best to all who joined in, and my thanks for the opportunity!
Jadey🐾
I’m so excited - the competition brought out wonderful writes from so many... and my congratulations to Missy & Reggie!
All the best to all who joined in, and my thanks for the opportunity!
Jadey🐾
ReggiePoet
Reggie
Forum Posts: 363
Reggie
Fire of Insight
28
Joined 13th May 2018Forum Posts: 363
Congratulations, Luna!
Anonymous
Congratulations dear Luna.