Least Read Funny Poems
#funny
Least read funny poems. Find an undiscovered masterpiece in the DU Poetry least read poems.
Poetic_Strength
Poem Published
30th Jan 2020 1:01am
30th Jan 2020 1:01am
Writers Block - Movie Time
Speechless and express-less,
Wished for verses to popup like popcorn,
But seemed as my butter froze.
Desire to gaze at ’ Two can play that game too”
But settled for “ How to lose a man in ten days”
Tell me how to “Space jam”
I want to “Pursuit my happiness”
Meanwhile I think I encountered an “Identity theft”
was “ gone in 60 seconds”
My “National treasure” was put on hold,
If I knew I would have dressed like Hally Berry my beloved “ Catwoman”
Nah wait I think seducing “ Batman” or “ Superman please re turn
For that I better call...
Wished for verses to popup like popcorn,
But seemed as my butter froze.
Desire to gaze at ’ Two can play that game too”
But settled for “ How to lose a man in ten days”
Tell me how to “Space jam”
I want to “Pursuit my happiness”
Meanwhile I think I encountered an “Identity theft”
was “ gone in 60 seconds”
My “National treasure” was put on hold,
If I knew I would have dressed like Hally Berry my beloved “ Catwoman”
Nah wait I think seducing “ Batman” or “ Superman please re turn
For that I better call...
#funny
#WritersBlock
#WritingPoetry #scifi
#WritingPoetry #scifi
20 reads
8 Comments
LilDragonFly
Poem Published
22nd Apr 2024 9:52am
22nd Apr 2024 9:52am
Buy Bibles, Hats and Sneakers
Sung to the tune of "Lawyers, Guns and Money" by Warren Zevon
(which can be found on YouTube)
I went home with a porn star
the way I always do
how was I to know
she was with the Russians too
I was scamming in Trump Tower
I took a little risk
buy bibles, hats and sneakers
MTG get me out of this
I'm a pussy grabbing coup plotter
but...
(which can be found on YouTube)
I went home with a porn star
the way I always do
how was I to know
she was with the Russians too
I was scamming in Trump Tower
I took a little risk
buy bibles, hats and sneakers
MTG get me out of this
I'm a pussy grabbing coup plotter
but...
#anger
#corruption
#funny
#lies
#politics
20 reads
wallyroo92
Poem Published
Yesterday 1:11am
Yesterday 1:11am
Geriatric Rock
#children
#family
#funny #music
#funny #music
20 reads
1 Comment
LilDragonFly
Poem Published
5th Oct 2020 10:04am
5th Oct 2020 10:04am
Laughter
That infamous "they"
always seem to say
that it is so
contagious
Like happiness is just
a virus
something that can
spread
Chasing away all dread
if only for a moment
if only for a while
bringing forth a smile
To carry along each day
lightening the load
always able to goad
us into a better mood
Like ambrosia just a food
sent from up above
in the company of love
to light our weary way
always seem to say
that it is so
contagious
Like happiness is just
a virus
something that can
spread
Chasing away all dread
if only for a moment
if only for a while
bringing forth a smile
To carry along each day
lightening the load
always able to goad
us into a better mood
Like ambrosia just a food
sent from up above
in the company of love
to light our weary way
#happiness
#funny
23 reads
6 Comments
Ljdynamic
Poem Published
4th Jul 2024 1:20am
4th Jul 2024 1:20am
Bedtime Capers
He gallivants into my room.
His face is a sight for sore eyes.
We kiss in an adulterated fashion
and my passion for him burns deep.
He rigamaroles words for foreplay,
but without delay he is in my mouth.
My mother hears all the brouhaha,
and she kicks the door down in fear.
Flummoxed, she beats him with the broom block
meanwhile, his cock is flying about.
She calls him a hoodwink,
but she does not know I have a kink.
Meanwhile, he desperately tries to pull
his britches up and cries for mercy.
He literally jumps out of...
His face is a sight for sore eyes.
We kiss in an adulterated fashion
and my passion for him burns deep.
He rigamaroles words for foreplay,
but without delay he is in my mouth.
My mother hears all the brouhaha,
and she kicks the door down in fear.
Flummoxed, she beats him with the broom block
meanwhile, his cock is flying about.
She calls him a hoodwink,
but she does not know I have a kink.
Meanwhile, he desperately tries to pull
his britches up and cries for mercy.
He literally jumps out of...
#funny
#WritingPoetry
26 reads
9 Comments
LilDragonFly
Poem Published
24th Jul 2021 8:07pm
24th Jul 2021 8:07pm
Poetaphobia
It is a real disease
designed to tease
those skittish lovers of art
of true literature
For those who read
but cannot concede
that they fear
the world of verse
Feeling the curse
of a prosaic life
with all of its strife
but unable to break away
Hear what the words say
nestled in their lines
how each stanza refines
elevates the soul
Pursuing the true goal
of each and every rhyme
to slow down even time
so we do not miss poetic bliss
designed to tease
those skittish lovers of art
of true literature
For those who read
but cannot concede
that they fear
the world of verse
Feeling the curse
of a prosaic life
with all of its strife
but unable to break away
Hear what the words say
nestled in their lines
how each stanza refines
elevates the soul
Pursuing the true goal
of each and every rhyme
to slow down even time
so we do not miss poetic bliss
#confessional
#LifeAsAWriter
#WritingPoetry
#funny
#PowerOfWords
29 reads
11 Comments
Ljdynamic
Poem Published
23rd May 2024 10:56pm
23rd May 2024 10:56pm
My Pest Problems
I ain't got no lucci
to afford Gucci.
So I'll buy Coach.
Little did I know a roach
stowed away in my travel
to unravel
this world as my oyster.
When did the roach hoist their
body into my brand-new bag?
I feel like the old hag
with eight cats, except I have creepy crawlers.
I sure ain't living the life of a baller.
Anyhow, after a long day of shopping
I'm hopping
on the bus to get to my house.
I need to change my blouse
and get ready to give my dog a bath.
Honestly, I'm not ready for the wrath
of...
to afford Gucci.
So I'll buy Coach.
Little did I know a roach
stowed away in my travel
to unravel
this world as my oyster.
When did the roach hoist their
body into my brand-new bag?
I feel like the old hag
with eight cats, except I have creepy crawlers.
I sure ain't living the life of a baller.
Anyhow, after a long day of shopping
I'm hopping
on the bus to get to my house.
I need to change my blouse
and get ready to give my dog a bath.
Honestly, I'm not ready for the wrath
of...
#frustration
#funny
31 reads
26 Comments
LilDragonFly
Poem Published
28th Apr 2021 11:51pm
28th Apr 2021 11:51pm
Isn't It Poetic
I want to meet him
the poem of my dreams
who is all that he seems
line for line
I'll wear a blue bonnet
when I marry my sonnet
having our very own
internal rhyme
While we spend our time
as our lines do entwine
with a feeling divine
feeding each other plump words
As he takes my hand
tumbling down cool sand
living this life of poetic
bliss
Building a five stanza poem
a place we'll call home
entwined in sweet verse ...
the poem of my dreams
who is all that he seems
line for line
I'll wear a blue bonnet
when I marry my sonnet
having our very own
internal rhyme
While we spend our time
as our lines do entwine
with a feeling divine
feeding each other plump words
As he takes my hand
tumbling down cool sand
living this life of poetic
bliss
Building a five stanza poem
a place we'll call home
entwined in sweet verse ...
#love
#funny
#confessional #WritingPoetry
#confessional #WritingPoetry
33 reads
25 Comments
Ljdynamic
Poem Published
16th May 2024 3:06am
16th May 2024 3:06am
When She Met Archer
Here lies Miss Challenge Accepted.
“I’ll put the apple on my head.”
is what she said.
Then she hit the floor,
and could say no more.
Looks like fate intercepted.
“I’ll put the apple on my head.”
is what she said.
Then she hit the floor,
and could say no more.
Looks like fate intercepted.
#death
#funny
#love
34 reads
20 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
2nd May 2025 1:25pm
2nd May 2025 1:25pm
absinthe minded 9 years ago!
my diary entry for the last day of April:
when all the physical stuff is done and dusted, re: moving again and decorating. i can re-enter the surreal, ethereal worlds again. and venture once more unto the breach of parallel worlds, and chill out! my expected chill out date being the 14th May! unless of course the usual unexpected occurs. so who knows? but it gives a target of some sorts. although, if i bear in mind that ive still got to unpack everything and finish decorating, fly to the moon, dance with Titania, explain myself to Oberon, and watch out for Puck, run a mini marathon (no...
when all the physical stuff is done and dusted, re: moving again and decorating. i can re-enter the surreal, ethereal worlds again. and venture once more unto the breach of parallel worlds, and chill out! my expected chill out date being the 14th May! unless of course the usual unexpected occurs. so who knows? but it gives a target of some sorts. although, if i bear in mind that ive still got to unpack everything and finish decorating, fly to the moon, dance with Titania, explain myself to Oberon, and watch out for Puck, run a mini marathon (no...
#alcohol
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#magic
#surreal
35 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
4th May 2025 00:02am
4th May 2025 00:02am
Peaking At The Weather!
Voice
"peaking
Thursday!"
Weather
forecast:
luckily.......
Not
in
Peking
then!
by Jemia
"peaking
Thursday!"
Weather
forecast:
luckily.......
Not
in
Peking
then!
by Jemia
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#misunderstood
38 reads
0 Comments
michaelslove2
Poem Published
3rd May 2025 8:16am
3rd May 2025 8:16am
Restroom Jingle
Restroom Jingle
Please don't talk on your cell phone
when you're takin' a leak.
We're just standin' here a peein'.
None of us wanna hear about your week.
Does the person on the other end,
do they really wanna hear
a buncha pissin', fartin', flushin'.
Is it comin' through now loud and clear?
If you can't keep off your cell phone
to do a little number two
now fella, I know I've got my own problems
but there's somethin' really wrong with you.
This is a place of privacy.
I'm not puttin' on a...
Please don't talk on your cell phone
when you're takin' a leak.
We're just standin' here a peein'.
None of us wanna hear about your week.
Does the person on the other end,
do they really wanna hear
a buncha pissin', fartin', flushin'.
Is it comin' through now loud and clear?
If you can't keep off your cell phone
to do a little number two
now fella, I know I've got my own problems
but there's somethin' really wrong with you.
This is a place of privacy.
I'm not puttin' on a...
#funny
39 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Least Read Funny Poems
