this would be so much easier if you could just read my mind

 
I tell you you're easy to talk to
and you look at me like you just got friend zoned
which was never my intention
cause what I say isn't what I mean

And I wish you could hear the words
between everything I don't say
like I can’t look at you without
imagining how your mouth would taste
after another cup of tea
or how you make me feel safe
and we should get naked some time
when I’m less scared of the way
you make me feel

So instead of saying the words between the silence
I ask you if you’ve ever had a threesome
and tell you how I think polyamory
is a totally viable relationship choice

And I love how you don’t look down at me
when I tell you about how I
used to fuck my drug dealer
or that I still think it’s cool I never
had to pay for drugs
or that I once fucked a guy
on the brink of suicide
and kept him alive
at least for one more night

You make me feel like
a living, breathing adventure
when the rest of the world
makes me feel like a degenerate whore
for being who I was
when I was still wild

And I have to admit
I don’t want this day to end
but when it does I still can’t
turn my face towards you
when you kiss my cheek goodnight
though I close my eyes
and savour this moment
of distant closeness
and I close the car door
without saying the words
I’ve wanted to say all night

I like you

© Indie Adams 2016