Makeup City

Dear A,

Found myself nodding in solidarity while reading this truth of life fantastic write. This made me think of how wrapped up in presenting myself in a particular way because that’s what I think I should do. If I did what I actually wanted to do, stay in baggy comfortable muumuus and warm fuzzy slippers I’d be as happy as a pig in a pokey. But I don’t and I won’t.
“ I feel a hurricane
in the rain
Hopefully it
all will get
washed away ” I really liked the idea of baptism in this phrase. Cleansing it away and starting fresh. Lovely metaphor. Great write. H🌷

Thank you!!! I am one of those females who gets all glammed up to have dinner with my girlfriends. Sometimes I gotta reel  myself in and chillax. Being in mom mode for so long I honestly forgot how it felt to let my hair down and have fun with it.  My poor husband.  LOL

Thanks again

Yesss!! Real women rock.  

Real nice rhythms, with an anthemic quality.
Lots of heavy, rhythmic stress patterns, and some good rhymes, make it fun to read.
Enjoyed!

Thank you!! Glad you enjoyed Mark

Your capacity with words is impressive. I enjoy watching you work them. If you used less to no punctuation, no capitalization, and hold back on And and Or it will add power to your words.       
        
Kinda like this       
     
she keeps her        
eyelids sketched    
flaunting both     
shimmer & gold   
highlighting her    
lush & electric    
red lips with    
a perfect glow     
      
Just a suggestion     
I could be wrong     
and I'll delete that      
If you want me to     
 

No no no no!!
I'm here to become a better writer
Honestly you answered a question about punctuation
It always gets in the way
I am the run on sentence queen

I changed that stanza again. What do you think of it? I'm not perfect with make up so I need your counsel lol

Ha! Very funny. You have been doing this a lot longer then me but I hear it choppy in my head when I thing of it musically.

Yeah it's all good. I'm kinda out of it. I shouldn't of been messing with it anyway. My bad. I still like your eork

No worries:)

Coolio 😎

Beautiful piece, Adelphina❣ I love your use of "cold" in your chorus. Makeup is designed to bring color and character to a face but often it does create a cold image that totally hides the wearer true warm, human being.  i love seeing women without makeup because I'm in to authenticity. Welcome to the DUP family. I look forward to reading more of your work. Bravissima!

Thank you Bravissima!  I was raised to put on your face before you go out the door. It's all fun when you are young but when you grow into motherhood it is just an extra chore. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don't. The golden rule of confidence. With or without it.
Thanks for commenting.

grew up with 5 sisters in the late '70's and '80's when makeup was applied with a trowel (joking) but  they did where lots foundation and such. I think in today's society women do wear less. BTW, the "Bravissima" was for your poetry...me screen-name is Gahdess_Worship and most of the poets refer to me as GW.

OMG!! Sorry.

Thanks again GW!!

No worries at all...just thought I'd let you know. Actually "Bravissima!" is not a bad screen-name.

love the glitter and the sparkle...shine on :)

Thank you!!!

You certainly took me to the good neighborhoods and bad ones too in this trip to Makeup City. From the very first line you see the beauty of your writing. The imagery is as unique and clever as your words. Oh, the glitz and glam... the beauty you create. "The face This place Hey, lets head to Makeup City" represents things so well and so many other incredible lines. Your formatting and line breaks really accentuate so well. 'Where everything is pretty and cold' definitely gives me the feel that GW described about possibly hiding the true beauty of the person. That which needs no make-up but yet we convince ourselves that it does. On a more morbid note, I felt the morticians hand working to put a beautiful face on for eternity. (sorry that's on the bad side of town lol). The words like faded and old, drowning and washed away pack such a contrast to the beginning of this and that last line really brings it all home. Just an amazing write all the way around!

Thank you so much for the feedback!! Sometimes it is just such a chore. I am pure female. I love all that stuff but I don't want to be defined by it as well. I am new here and am a little gun shy to give feedback as well as you do. So I want to thank you for all of your comments on my writing. Since I've been here you have been a great pen pal.

It's been so great to get your feedback too. Please don't ever be concerned that it's not enough. :) (This was quite a long comment but there was a lot to cover.) You contribute so much.