Parts Of me Are Missing

.        
       
i close my eyes so that i might find You        
seek the place You hide        
maybe i can break through this divide        
i find nothing but darkness inside        
empty.        
hollow.        
nothing of my Own.        
       
how much longer must i go on        
without You i'm nothing but all alone        
there is no meaning in my life now that You are gone        
and there is nothing i can find to replace You        
       
Although i've tried a million times to obstruct this hole You left behind        
it's just become a bottomless pit that runs all the way through        
no matter how many chemicals i digest        
or what lover i choose next        
i just self destruct        
left with less -        
to reconstruct        
       
Missing You becomes unbearable        
my loneliness becoming insufferable        
this disorder is intolerable!        
they say it is not treatable.        
       
       
       
       
(depersonalization disorder-the loss of self)        
       
       
          
       
       
Without ▼ Emotions        
By CombiChrist

"Without emotions        
Without feelings        
Without love        
Without hate        
       
Breath is just a clock ticking        
       
Ticking ...        
Ticking ...        
Ticking ...  "      
       
       
       
*                
Album: Everybody Hates You        
▶ Sound clip from the film: Equilibrium      
     
 .    
     
Image: Natalie Hertz, Fantastical Tarot, 1999.