Misloved

I can't stop
This seductress is a part of me
A companion who's always there
Never failing to lift my spirits
And when she leaves...
 
The sadness returns
 
Constant longing
Forever craving
The company of my old friend
Who understands me like no other
 
My soul mate
My nemesis
Slowly dissolving me
Into her destructive fantasy

you'll do what you've always done
stay too long
pretending you're a suitor
or a knight in shining armor
and i'm a damsel in this dress

what a mess we've made of things
you've been content to play the part
of an ill-suited lover
in a prime-time t.v. sitcom
and i've been swiftly blown about
wearing my heart on my sleeve

I’m not satisfied with the feigned love that you’re showing.
It doesn’t seem to bother you that our marriage is failing.
Judging from your frigidity and the way you’ve been acting,
You don’t love me, and your respect for me is decreasing.
 
I found out that you’re having an affair, so please stop lying.
He’s gratifying your mind and body, and I’m here worrying.
The mere thought of you being with him is so perturbing.
I really trusted you, yet I’m the one whom you’re deceiving.
 
You know that I’m doing my best to keep us from separating,
But I can’t handle the stress that your pretence is causing.
Should I just act as if everything is all right and say nothing?
I must do something about it cos your conduct is degrading.
 
You’re faking affection for me, and it really hurts my feelings,
But I love you despite the constant heartache I’m having.
Although you’ve become dull and our love life is less titillating,
It saddens me very much to see our relationship ending.
 
Baby, I deserve someone who’s comforting and encouraging.
You’re not doing anything to prevent my heart from breaking.
Sometimes I just can’t hold back the tears when I’m hurting.
You should consider my anguish and be more understanding.
 
Having a wife who feigns love is exactly what I was avoiding.
All this pretence and unfaithfulness shouldn’t be happening.
It’s difficult to find a woman with a love that’s heart-warming,
But I’ll take an optimistic view of life and keep on searching.
 
It’s time to say goodbye cos our love is obviously not working.
Perhaps you’ll have success with the man whom you’re dating.
Baby, I’ll neither plead with you nor coax you into staying.
You can leave any time you want, my pride is worth protecting.

She broke my heart
With her mind games
Telling the truth
Didn't set me free
But if felt right
to clear my chest
For Love Is A Bitch
And she will break your HEART!

 
In my veracity there
 was love.
Stupid naive girl still
believing in the fairy
 tale of the betrothed

With pride you added
me to your gathering
of pretty little things
While you avidly
imposed yourself 
on me like the burden
of a decaying ulcer
 in need of a purge 

A crust, you call love develops so deep it
 cracks and bleeds
my soul
Your blanket of sick
 comfort wraps me
as I sit and listen for
silence to exhale 

I am duped a cretin,
 left here to harden 
 in this hovel lined
with damask and 
plush fringe  

Your loving words an
 instrument of 
purposeful intent to
hold me in your loving
 arms  ever deepening
 my debility

What is left of this  pensive mute devoid
of slumber
You've pierced my
thoughts my dreams
bleed.
You kick aside the
clots that spill out onto
the  floor 

Into a silver vial you
 own pieces of me 
Our love has become tiresome
 I believe the cogs  are
worn on this cyclic
 machine 

Scourge of sorrow, words that lash,
thorns that cut and rip my soul.
Your smile’s a mask you wear
to hide the face of the executioner.

You hide the sun and fill the sky
with darkness and eternal tempest.
Flowers, once bloomed, hide their
petals and beg to return to seed.

You surround yourself with the air
of sweetness and compassion,
all the while hiding those hungry
claws just waiting to tear and rip.

You lay hidden, waiting for that
passing unsuspecting soul to quench
your thirst for pain and misery, without
regard for the impact of your actions.

You are a predator of the worst kind.
You hunt for pleasure not for survival.
Sadness fuels your actions and terror
brings that motivation to hunt again.

I scream, I shout, I beg for release.
I’m bound by this curse that is you.
What have I done to deserve this fate
of horror in the guise of love.

In this that once was
quietus sighs lay amid intimate suffering
as festering bodies take life’s place
where numb grows the bed beneath them
as gelid frames consummate with
broken souls to harden a once sacred
chaise of devotion into an
unforgiving glacial mass of regret

And exhalations of vows upon a time
when lips needed not part to convey affection
now exhausts veils of reciprocated
disdain for the deadened worse of a non-existent better
that no man put asunder but those to which divide
self from selves so whole shall no longer be

And there they lay
frigid hushed wails lamenting beneath backs
and spines immobilized by inclinations of
discontentment compelled by commitment
as walls expunge resolution between two
carrions too weak to die

And they lay
forgetting yester’s promise of
better morns to come and
acquiesce this existence
for neither yester nor morrow shall return
and as they assent to this immortal day,
they place their heads in misery’s bosom
where she comforts them til now yields
this day once more
and they comply to torment
requited between them
as they bid
one to the other
goodnight...

A broken person in rage:  lord let me talk to you as I'm working out there are several things on my mind and it's been hurting for a quite while. I'm jealous, because of the love that I'm not getting that the female I love is giving out to the ones that don't deserve it, I'm always in my feelings due to that I'm going to remain broken until I get over it. Yea she really did some damage to me I'm still hurting until I don't leave it alone I am still going to be in the same position like I was before. Now she got a man and say that he better than me lord tell me how having sex with someone is moving on. The pain is there from the whole year when she was cheating and misusing me.  The school that I love is doing now damn I thought they love me, I guess I was wrong my mother told me she said son just hold on. I don't want to walk across that stage, because I don't have nothing to uplift my name. Everything that I'm trying to get in is a fail, because my grade point average is 2.2 need three points or above in order to get money to pay for school or be eligible to get a group so he can look good on your resume, but WHAT I got now an impressive reason for someone big to look at me, now a days the people that I love is passing me over like I'm dead animal in the street or piece of paper just look and toss it in the trash I just remembered its all about looks this is a screwed up world. Lord just be with me