Mother Ocean

I used to love the ocean
but now she makes me sad

She reminds me that I am not vast
that my life is small
and that the only shores
I may ever see
are the ones I stand upon
have always stood upon
and will stand upon again
with longing

My life is small
and I have made myself
in its image
I can't see beyond this moment
and I fear to look into the depths
and dream for more than this

I'm not entirely unhappy
but I'm discontent
with the walls
that hem me in
walls made of bones and promises
and things to come that never come
walls made of words and hooks
that find a way inside
and bind me in fear
telling me I am not worthy of the sea
and all her greatness
because what am I
compared to her

I try and find the small smiles
in cyclic days that pass both too fast
and too slow
I try to remind myself to be grateful
and find beauty in the things
I forget to notice

Though perhaps I was the greatest thing
I forgot to notice
always comparing myself to the sea

I used to love her without end
and I still do
but she makes me sad
reminds me that I am small
when I want to be just as glorious as she

© Indie Adams 2022