Dear Mom and Dad

I was up all night trying to find the words that fit
 
But after a couple hours all I could get
 
Was a line about how I really wished
 
I was a better son to you both and wasn't such a piece of..
 
I know I'm sick and I know I'm depressed
 
And I know you both hate the fact that I smoke copious amounts of sess
 
And I'm sorry I got you both stressed
 
Wondering if I end up taking my own life what would happen next
 
But I've though of that too and I want you to know
 
You're never going to have to bury your son under a willow
 
Or see my body laying in a casket
 
Or have to sell my denim jacket just so you could try and get passed it
 
Walk into my room knowing I'm off to greener pastures
 
I'm perfectly fine being alive no need to hire a pastor
 
To try and settle your mind
 
Dear mom and dad, I want you to know I'm still alive
 
 
 
And if I could go back in time and retrace my steps
 
I would have done things differently I could have never guessed
 
That the rope would have broke and I could have caught my breath
 
I love you mom and dad don't you ever forget  
 
X2
 
 
 
And while I'm on the topic of suicide  
 
I want to tell you the truth that sometimes it still crosses my mind
 
But at the same time I've learned not to step foot over that line
 
Even if it's for a second I will never climb
 
That mountain ever again, I'm blessed for what you have given me
 
Sincerely I hope I can continue to breath
 
And inhale clean air that isn't polluted by grief  
 
Depression seeps and to be honest I'm just trying to keep
 
Myself healthy by exercising and eating my red meat
 
Will never become a deadbeat as long as my heart still beats
 
And if you didn't hear it the first time I'll say it twice
 
Thank you mom and dad for never letting me say goodbye
 
 
 
 
If I could go back in time and retrace my steps
 
I would have done things differently I could have never guessed  

That the rope would have broke and I could have caught my breath
 
I love you mom and dad don't you ever forget
 
X2