Out of breath

I don't understand why people do what they do
When everything is going perfect
We self destruct and come unglued

Pushing away  and hurting the ones most dear
Destroying are self and loved ones with barely a clue

Don't do this
I never wanted this
I want the old times back where I didn't feel like this
Not sure uneasy and paranoid as shit
Mind racing
 thinking what are their tricks

Nothings for free
Everyone wants something from you
Ulterior motives getting in close to you
Then Using your weakness  against you .

Humans are a disease
There just like a flu
Destroy the beautiful
That lives inside of you
  
I wish I didn't feel numb
I wish I could feel your love
I wish i could trust you
But you already fucked that up
Telling me of all the lies betrayal
And Cheating
In just are first meeting
Probably not the best to do
Now I got my eye on you
And I hate it
I don't want to care this much
Take it all back
I don't want to feel love
I'll just self medicate until I feel numb