A Clear Winner

When I got divorced these many years ago I took a temporary job on a psychic line. This story is an elaboration of a guy who rang me asking for winning lottery numbers. (Like I'd be sitting there telling him if I knew?) I never met his like before or since.


‘It that thar the Euro’peen psychic line?’

‘Yes sir, this is Sibyl speaking how I can help’

‘Ah whunt the West Texas loddery numbers fer this week y’all an’ I wants ‘em now.’ he paused and drew a wheezy breath ‘this hire call’s costin’ me $5 a minute so make it quick OK?’

Sibyl shuddered this was exactly the kind of call she hated as it brought down her call averages and reduced her bonus.‘Very well sir’ she said politely ‘and is there anything else I can help you with today?’

‘No thar ain’t’ came the sharp reply ‘now git on with it an’ stop yer cheatin’ on mah money.’

Sibyl sighed ‘Very well sir but be careful of what you wish for, you might get more than you bargained for.’

‘Listen woman if’n y’all don’ stop gabbin' n' git on with it ah’m a gonna ring yer supervisor an’ report yo ass. Git on wid it fer chrissakes.’

Bubba Jones was known as Moansy-Jonesy on the trailer park where he lived in squalor with his partner of 30 years Elle Perks. When the sun shone it was too hot when it didn’t it was goddamn awful weather that ‘gits mah rhumatiz a-goin’ he would moan. Elle used to say that if you gave him a solid gold brick he’d complain that it was too heavy and the wrong damn colour. She only stayed with him because she’d nowhere else to go. She did the cooking and cleaning and worked part time as a waitress to bring in a few extra dollars whilst he sat in his chair complaining
.
Sibyl looked deep into her Chrystal breathing lightly and letting go of her thoughts. A minute ticked by and she wrote some numbers on a sheet

‘You still thar woman?’ Bubba snapped ‘Mah patience is wearin’ awful thin.’

‘Do you have a pen and paper sir?’

There was a sharp intake of wheezy breath at the other end of the line ‘Elle, Elle fer chrissakes, bring me some paper an’ a goddamn pen will ya?’ he bawled ‘hurry up now y’hire.’ He mumbled into the phone ‘bitch is always movin’ pens an’ such from the phone t’ make out shoppin’ list’s n’ shit.’

Sibyl loved working the American line as most of the folks she helped were very friendly and listened to her readings attentively, thanking her politely when she’d done. Just occasionally she’d get a ‘Bubba’ like this one. Ah well, she thought philosophically, such is life we’ve plenty like him over here, too.

There was a rustling sound and a woman’s voice mumbled an apology. ‘OK, fire away lady.’
Sibyl read the numbers out.  Bubba asked ‘an’ these hire numbers is guran’tide t’ win this week?’

‘You may have to play them for up to six weeks sir’ said Sibyl smiling down the phone but they are very lucky that’s for sure, they match your personality.’ She got Bubba to read them back. He grumbled once more about the cost of the call then did as she asked. After correcting the last number which he’d written down incorrectly  he hung up without so much as goodbye. Sibyl quickly forgot all about him.

Although she was highly talented Sibyl had never used her powers for her own personal gain. Her mother, who had been a respected medium, had warned her against doing so. She told her that when the time came she would be rewarded. Sibyl was well past the age of retirement now but still found she had to work in order to pay the bills and look after Jason her disabled husband. Life was hard but she never complained.

It was a bleak North West England morning with the wind whistling through the cracked windows of the old office block where she worked, Sibyl felt depressed. She had just replaced the receiver after a reading when it rang again immediately. It wasn't her turn for another call and the other readers looked at her quizzically. Puzzled she picked up the phone ‘Sibyl speaking.’

‘Hi it’s John from the office’ her manager said ‘we have a lady on the line called Elle and she insists on talking to you personally’ with that John put her through.

‘Hi, you Sibyl?’ came a pleasant Texas drawl.

‘Speaking, how can I help you Elle?’

Y’all cain’t baby but I’m gonna help you, yessiree. You gave mah ole man some numbers seven weeks back. He put ‘em on fer five weeks straight then, when he won nothing, he gave up, cussin’ you fer a cheatin’ ho so I took ‘em over. I won first time’ her voice was rising with excitement. ‘Now sweet lady let me tell you what happened’ she paused and drew a deep breath relishing the moment ‘I never told the old fart I’d won, just packed a small bag when he was asleep and caught the Greyhound outta there. I rung him from Huston the very next day an’ gave the mean bastard the good news. He wuz a-screaming I’d stole his winnings, using his numbers he’d paid fer.’ She pause again the deep pleasure in her voice obvious. ‘I waited until he was in full flow shoutin’ an’ a-cussin’ an’ then I hung up on the sonofabitch; I knew that would get his goat real good. Now I’m gonna give you a million dollars sweetie y’all deserve it an’ I’ve booked me a first class ticket t’ come on over an’ give it to ya personally.’

Sherri ff John “Stonewall” Jackson looked at the doctor as he emerged from the trailer ‘Well doc’ he said casually spitting out tobacco juice  in a foul stream onto a passing hound dog ‘she kill him an’ split or whut?’

The doctor looked at the officer’s expectant face ‘Sorry Stonewall not this time I’m afraid in layman’s terms it was apoplexy that took him. I dunno who was on the other end of that phone in his hand but they must have sure riled him up plenty.’