Survivors of touch...

And I'm amazed by yours.
A grateful hug.

Thank you.

I am blown away by everyone's brave writes and incredible strength!

My systems are failing on my phone...keyboard has been freezing..
It is working right now...And so happy to be able to thank everyone...

I have tried to answer mail....And say something about everyone....and it has been very frustrating not to be able to.

So please....encourage and support one another....

Lighting a candle for everyone's continued healing and peace...

❤🌹

lacrimosa ~

cathedrals of prussian
& persian blue sleep
in gate fold & pressed wax
against plastic stars
on the ceiling ~
... she fears the floorboards
the oaken squeak,
the slivers of porcelain
from anushka's leg
still unswept from the scene
that leaves her dead
{again
& again &...}
*
he buries her deeper
{night
after night after...}
beneath tiny flowers
of indeterminate genus;
they smell of
his nameless myrrh
& look like her,
pale & ever fading  
//

Foreign Skin


Skin touches my skin
But it is foreign skin
Touching my skin
Bewilders my senses
A scar born
A mental wound


It festers till infected
My mind open and unprotected
Left rusted and wretched
I grow neglected
Of my own will
I am my enemy
Since our skin met
I am a soul of regret


The sins are mine

this is very expressive and i love the way you write a lot. thankyou so much for sharing, i think your words will stick with me for a quite while.

calamitygin said:Write about your experiences with sexual, verbal or physical abuse growing up...

Not all abuse is sexual, verbal or physical.



Dead Limb Removal

While your current obsession
with genealogy continues to escalate
I took an axe to the family tree long ago
hacking off your limb

For some time now
in case you didn't know
you've been dead to me
Neither considering you
sister or friend

No longer available
for you to manipulate
because in the end
you fucked so many of us over with

lies

about how you were
a victim of sexual assault
by this boy and that man
and then all these other guys

Strange
how the list
was subject to change
after losing custody of your daughter
she conveniently became a child of rape

Accusations always ran wild
stories told to private parties never added up
when notes were compared
in a short sighted bonsai of a Ponzi scheme

emotional blackmail and guerrilla psychology
employed in the cultivation of allies
all exploited for personal gain

Once upon a time in a sick nursery rhyme
a slick snake oil salesman tried to preach
Blood is thicker than water

Although I was able to escape and remain
beyond the scrape of your twisted reach
you've set your sights on others
unsuspecting branches

poor saps
who will eventually learn the hard way
the wood is destined to be abused and used in
building more bridges that will ultimately
burn

The feel of your skin
Touching against mine
When I kiss your neck
I now your mine

You cry out papi
When I pull your hair
the erection of my dick
Makes you gasp for air

Tell!
[/b]
You caught me unawares
As I knelt to say my prayers,
I was just a little kid and what you did,
Stayed with me throughout the years,
Can’t be expunged with a million tears.

Why? What did I do
Was I bad to you?
You put your penis in my mouth,

“Suck you little fuck!”

You shoot your gout,
I want to shout, to spit it out,
You close my nostrils, make me swallow,
I’m dead inside, I feel so hollow.

You tell me not to tell my mother
Or you’ll do it to my little brother,

I hold my peace.

You haunt me nightly in my dreams,
And deep within me my soul screams,
Still I hold my peace, no release, will it ever cease?
Why do you do it? I am your niece!

The years pass by and I cannot ease
The guilt and shame I feel,
Will it ever heal?
I’m filled with rage from this early age
And turn upon myself,
Take the razor from the shelf,
Place its edge upon my arm,
Feeling no alarm,

I cut,

I cut because I’m a dirty slut,
Guilty! I tempted you

I must have done, I must have done,
But if I die you will have won,
So I slash lightly not too deep,
And then I cry myself to sleep.

Now I have a daughter of my own,
Leave her alone! Leave her alone,
To protect her I find the courage to say,
What you did to me on many a day.

I tell,

My husband listens, shocked disbelief,
Lost in grief,
Tears cascading down his face,
He burns with shame at my disgrace,

We tell

My tormentor now is locked away,
Oh joyful day, oh joyful day!
I now have help I talk it through,
And if this has ever happened to you,

Tell!

Tell and send the pain away,
A teacher, parent, trusted friend,
Tell and bring it to an end,
Tell and make this person halt,
Darling child it’s not your fault.

Tell!

my ugly ass
is a product of my ugly past
and I aint talking bout my face
I don’t care how they judge me that
nah, I just speak on how we wear our scars
and I dont really think mine
are more important than yars
emotional or physical
pain is pain
and if you see me then you’ve felt it
game recognise game
so if you find me unfamiliar
or kinda strange
know I’m glad for you
while i still walk in the rain
and thanks but no thanks
but I don’t need a ride
it means alot that you offer
I appreciate you guys
so I wear my scars well
to me my past is my pride
I am far from perfect person
but my ugly
I’ll never hide

Hi all--sending a heads up that this comp is now on the abandoned list, and we're waiting to hear from the host as to whether or not we'll be sending it to vote.  Stay tuned....

Congrats to katja and Jaden_Pandora for coming out with the top nods. I also want to say congrats to everyone else that entered this competition, this subject matter can be hard to write about, and telling your own experiences can be even harder, so thank you to everyone who entered.

19xx

I wish our host Jen could've been here, but even so, we all thank her for the opportunity.  

I personally thank those who voted, making it possible to share the podium with our very talented cup-winner _shadoe_; congratulations dear Katja.

Blessings to everyone who bled their entry through their pens; this was a difficult theme to live up to, that's why my comment is subdued.  I wish all survivors a better way going forward.

love
-Jade ( Orchid )