scarlet sky

scarlet skies
loom over head
as a head appears from my girls legs
i wonder how
can i be a father
when i was raised by a mother
and no one....
else
i just wish to teach my son how to be a man
and under a scarlet sky
much the same
we talked of getting rid of this beautiful baby boy
but i couldn't destroy innocence
in a conversation that never happened
its not part of my way
under a scarlet sky
i know i will need help
but then i wake up
laying under a scarlet sky and realize it was all a dream
thankfully
 i have time to grow
because i know only enough to know i don't know that much
knock knock knock
echoes through the rotted wood of my door
and how would i care for a kid as young as i am
fatherless i was
no one taught me how to dribble a ball write in rhythm and with intelligence i had not learned to talk to a woman
but even if i was i wouldn't want it to be from that man
who abandoned me and my mother
under a scarlet sky
a large white bird flew in the distance with supersonic sounds
and i...
i imagined what it is to be a man
and i listed what i would teach my son
how i would say it
dictate it
make an example
be what i need to be
i to start off need to be there
and i will teach him what other men needed to teach me
how to dribble a ball
to raise my fists only in defense
to jump fences
not for the  reasons that i had to
from the red and blue
but just to be able to
to write with a pen
in accurate thought
how to play games on the field not in womems hearts and minds
and how to be sound
unlike me
mildly psychotic
insomniactic
white knight syndrome
twisted justice
man
who speaks of soul
had to have a therapist
because of his problems
to teach him
to change the world
for the better
that's a fact
to not act
not pose
to stay focused not doze off in class
not to harass
those different from him
be a renegade to the negative
how to appreciate soul of jazz and real rap
his heritage
a Polynesian
Puerto Rican
Native of America
yes he will be a mixed up kid
but he will live under scarlet sky
and breathe the air that i do
see what he sees
won't be what ever i saw in my youth
but he will know of images from the past
and when he lays with a women
and one day
has a son of his own he will have refined this poem
and recited it as it is
lacking of flashy words
because they make the world turn but it ain't turning right
it will be of raw thought and emotion
like the beauty of scarlet sky