deepundergroundpoetry.com
TO NEW HORIZONS
Come, sail away with me
we don't need a boat
we will get there easily
in the magic of dreams.
Beyond the dark horizons
on unexplored shores
just waiting for our feet
to come and explore.
New territory awaits us
let's join hearts and go
we can't wait another minute.
love must never move slow.
The Kissing Place is waiting
with new magic and desires
as our bodies melt together
as we share kisses of fire.
we don't need a boat
we will get there easily
in the magic of dreams.
Beyond the dark horizons
on unexplored shores
just waiting for our feet
to come and explore.
New territory awaits us
let's join hearts and go
we can't wait another minute.
love must never move slow.
The Kissing Place is waiting
with new magic and desires
as our bodies melt together
as we share kisses of fire.
Published 16th Jan 2024
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16th Jan 2024 11:32pm
Good day, Dear Poet,
What a splendidly laid piece you've composed and shared for our pleasure … most especially, I enjoyed the smooth syntactic flow of each line, warming romantic imagery, and beautifully creative metaphor throughout.
Great title, and for a rhyming composition, what could be better than a suite of Quatrains? V1 a/c rhyme scheme threw me a bit, as the rest is in b/d, but that's an easy fix – if you've the mind to.
The closing verse was the perfect bow on this lovely present.
Kudos to your excellent skills … I very much enjoyed this one.
With most grateful thanks! ⁓ Richard🖌
What a splendidly laid piece you've composed and shared for our pleasure … most especially, I enjoyed the smooth syntactic flow of each line, warming romantic imagery, and beautifully creative metaphor throughout.
Great title, and for a rhyming composition, what could be better than a suite of Quatrains? V1 a/c rhyme scheme threw me a bit, as the rest is in b/d, but that's an easy fix – if you've the mind to.
The closing verse was the perfect bow on this lovely present.
Kudos to your excellent skills … I very much enjoyed this one.
With most grateful thanks! ⁓ Richard🖌
16th Jan 2024 11:42pm
Thank you for your very encouraging comment; honestly it made my day. I am looking forward to reading more of your outstanding work. Hugs and peace, Oral
17th Jan 2024 3:09am
I need a ride though, if I'm to realise my dreams. That's just being practical, right? ;-)
17th Jan 2024 4:16am
17th Jan 2024 4:27am
Dear TO,
Beautiful meter and excellent rhyming. I love the subject matter and you’ve really done such a wonderful job of making this read and roll right off the tongue. Lovely write. H🌷
Beautiful meter and excellent rhyming. I love the subject matter and you’ve really done such a wonderful job of making this read and roll right off the tongue. Lovely write. H🌷
17th Jan 2024 5:42am
Anonymous
- Edited 28th Mar 2025 1:50am
17th Jan 2024 12:55pm
<< post removed >>
17th Jan 2024 2:10pm
