Complex Love

what is
more complex
than love?

knowing most of your life
you’re not the same
as other people

dark desperate desires
you can
hardly admit

wondering
if you’re damaged goods
sick in mind and soul

don’t dare tell anyone
(they’ll know
you’re different)

will never love you
if they know
what you really are

looking at you in a way
you try not to look at yourself
as something twisted and wrong

keeping dark secrets locked away
wanting dark scary things
so much it’s a physical ache

vanilla sex is fine wonderful
just not quite enough
wondering if you will ever feel

as deeply
as passionately
as desperately as you want

it’s like anyone
you make love to
only touches half of you

the body isn’t just a shell
it’s the physical connection
between souls

when someone recognizes
that twisted desire sees it and calls to it
when you let that part out of the cage

for the first time someone
making love to all of you someone as
twisted as you

someone who
instead of
turning away

expresses love
not in spite of what you are
but because of what you are

that is more complex than love

© 2023 Raibeart Bruis