Your nurse...

Damn Ted! You made it pretty quick this time. ;) Complex and cryptic, yeah that's definitely me all the way. That's why this is in the Self category. And I am enjoyable all over though, anywhere, anytime, and definitely ALL over. ;) But I can torture a lot too and that complexity can be pretty confusing and difficult as well. Intensity always  comes with a price, it's not for everyone. Still I will choose intense passion every time mixed with all my darkness. It's easy to miss a lot on the first pass. I am a the best damn nurse EVER. ;)

Why are you talking like that? Inquiring minds want to know... :p And yeah, what has my poem done to you, I really want to know that? Tongues are very important especially with the nurse around. It's far darker than you probably can imagine. So I would say yes. :p

Ah yes a plethora of dark experience indeed.
two midnights in a jug, definitely an expression I have never heard before. ;) Haha, I am sure your tongue needs to do some of it's own 'examining'. :p
Surprise and intrigue, those are definitely things I know well. So I suppose they show through. ;)

Beautifully written but oh so dark! Hmmmm wonder if I can get some of the stuff you use to clean up blood stains?!? Enjoyed the read! 💜💜

Hey eyes, you definitely see a lot. ;) This is absolutely very dark but much of my writing is. There are lots of reasons for that but when you spent so much time there, it's where you become comfortable and somehow you keep coming back to it.  I get the feeling you know what that's like. So many blood stains and they definitely are painted on the soul. We learn from each one and they help us endure more, because there will always be more. Still that can truly make the most beautiful painting. I think that people who have endured pain and suffering and survived have a depth that attracts.

Oh I know that feeling a little too much more than I would like to admit at times.  Too many trials and tribulations in my life to even start explaining.  Girl if I went to a psychiatrist by the time I leave she will need a psychiatrist. lol 💜💜

Oh boy, we are definitely going to get along so well. ;) I kind of have the feeling my psychiatrist would need to be on suicide watch. I definitely look forward to reading more of you when I get a chance. Something tells me you have a lot to say. I am very good at reading between the lines too.

Life on the razor's edge, but so love and patience have proven they can widen the razors edge as wide as a four lane highway. Hahaha although a beast struggles against it's chains, it realizes it's chance at freedom is patience. So patiently it waits for the opportunity to through ripping tears shoe you it's love of freedom. Tight one Lady

Ah, yes I am so used to the razor's edge. I love the imagery you have put in my mind of the razor's edge as wide as a four lane highway. In fact, I think you should write one about that. (hint) Yes breaking free from the chains can take patience and planning as well. I have experienced many chains and each one is so different. Yes, the razor's edge can be so exciting and you feel so intensely but god knows it can be so painful too. Still for some when you cut with a razor it feels good. It can provide this meditative soothing feeling but if you cut too deep it leaves scars. Theirs is a fine balance I suppose. I feel like it's been a while since I got a tight one from you ME. I love that.

Where is that needle going ?
Actually who cares if she's making the stick
Jab me nurse
Over and over again
Dark and satisfying
Pic has a 1950s sex Bomb feel
I don't feel well
Do you make house calls ???

One of your sexiest BEST

BIG JAB LIKE

RL AWARD

You don't want to know where that needle is going trust me. ;)
Yeah, exactly. You just won't care any more.
I am the best damn nurse ever.
That's what she said.
Very dark, and that is so satisfying.
Sex bomb feel I get, not seeing the 50s though. More modern to me.
But in a country where nurse's can still dress super sexy.
And where they can cause LOTS of pain and pleasure. None of those pesky rules.
Aw, what seems to be the problem?
Yes I can make house calls... I am good like that.

Sexiest BEST Hell yeah! I love that.

BIG JAB (not telling you where)

Really Love (RL)

I simply enjoyed reading this...a feast of language and imagery written in chaotic simply...a pleasure Kristina:)

A feast of language and imagery, Wow I so loved serving you this feast BC and that you see it that way. I have to admit it so often amazes me that people can follow and like my chaotic and strange style. ;) There are often so many different meanings. It was a real pleasure reading your comment. I am glad you were not afraid to come see the nurse even with that huge needle. And you know how much I love pain... ;)

Hi Kristina:)

Love how this starts out with a nurse then stitches into flames - then a  mainframe.
It all transitioned naturally with your voice and aura.
So creative and erotic.
Great word pairing - chaotic and strange. For some reason those two
resonate with me. LOL
Don't ask - I'm complicated!! hahahaha
Great ending chica:)
Living to Die!!!

Hey Adel... ;) The transition from nurse and stitches into flames and then a mainframe all makes perfect sense to me. lol And there are so many different meanings. ;) I love that you always pick up on my voice and aura so well. My mind can definitely put some crazy stuff together and I love that you picked up on the erotic aspect as well. Chaotic and strange sums me up pretty well I think. :p Haha, that's why we get along famously and why your smile always seduces me. ;) Hell yeah, I am going to ask. lol That's me asking... We are all Living to Die!!! Just some of us are way crazier than others.

Smashed the write clear out the ground
Brilliant read, awesome write
Love and light
Ron x

Damn! that's a new one Ron, and I absolute love Smashed the write clear out of the ground. Wow. Brilliant and awesome is what I always want for you. I am feel pretty awesome that you liked this one so much. I suppose I wondered if it was just a bit too much me. lol If anyone would understand it so feeling pretty good about that right now. ;) Lots of love and light back at ya. ;)

Damn you are my hot sexy naughty nurse.  Keep on writing.

I am the best damn naughty nurse ever Francisco. I could bring you back from the dead. lol And then light you on fire and reboot you and do it all over again because I think that's fun damnit. :p I always love your encouragement and hot sexy naughty nurse, oh yeah that's perfect. Because if something's wrong then who better to take care of it. ;) And I love the encouragement.

You can light my fire anyday.  

And you have lots of fire already Francisco so adding to it is like a bonfire. ;) I love bonfires.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.  😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

So I make a pretty good nurse practitioner... just saying.  Lol.
Btw, the woman in the pic has great ...
posture!

Your mind is non-stop, it shows in your writes.  Just swirls and swirls of chaos, good and probably a little bad.  And as cliche as it sounds, it's the brightest views you have that will lead you further forward.  The dark just stays dark.  
Even though you follow a main theme in most your writes, it's obvious that you are adding angles and metaphors far more.  It's intriguing to see it play out.  

And you are wrong. You are not living to die. You are dying to live!  It's in your writes.  

So, what are you wearing for Halloween.  Lol

Oh really, I want to know more about you being a nurse practitioner, what??? What scripts would you write for me? God, I can only imagine.
Definitely, 'posture' is so important.
And that's exactly how I dress when I do nursing... ;) The patient is UP immediately. And that's exactly what I want. To have my patient UP and about in no time. Just penetrating life with all they've got. Not feeling down anymore. And if they do, I know just how to get them back UP again. I am the best damn nurse ever.

Oh God, my mind is constantly going. The only thing that changes that is sex and other intense physical sensations like pain, other physical activities and fitness. And a damn strong Indica or some other substances slow it down. ;) Okay, too much information. lol Tons of chaos, maybe some good, and LOTS of bad. ;) That's interesting about the brightest views seeing as how I find myself so drawn to the dark. But there is a lot to that. I think we should explore what you said more... Perhaps I will write about it. (well I have before many times but again).

So many angles and metaphors but really they just come however they do. The worst thing I can do is 'try' to write. But I love that the progression is intriguing. I think in many ways it's so much easier for you to see the changes than me. So I love hearing about them.

Well I like your distinction a lot there actually. That gives me another idea. ;)

That's a very good question! I might have to get a hold of that nurses outfit, but there are so many ideas in my head. :p

Now with this you’ve got me thinking about David Bowie: “And I've been putting out fire
With gasoline”

Oh damn! I love that song Jazz, it's so good. You know all the songs don't you... just singing in your head. Perhaps my poem is singing in your head too. I would like that. ;) Putting out the fire with gasoline is definitely something I do in regards to passion. I just want the passion to always burn hotter forever and ever. But you know what that's like Jazz I can tell. ;)

Oh heck no. I am clueless on modern country  music, most rap, heavy metal, and opera.

Haha, well I am pretty clueless on country and rap, and opera for the most part these days. But heavy metal; oh yeah, I like me some metal. lol Old Metallica - absolutely incredible. So start there... If you want I can send you some suggestions if interested. I think you will love it although I imagine you have listened before.

My biggest criteria for defining something as good music- I must be able to understand the lyrics.

The Metallica lyrics on the old stuff are insanely good. They are incredibly meaningful and yes you can understand the words when being sung. I know some heavy metal you can't... but trust me... ;)

We always want others to be what we need, but the deepest need is for them to be themself. Would that not be the greatest love, to fall for each other and who we really are? 🌼

Without a doubt, so often the other person tries so hard to change us. To force us to be what they have in mind and it makes you think what is wrong with me. Why are you so intensely attracted to me and yet want to change me. I have seen the ugliness of jealousy, possessiveness, and control and so often it causes this intense pressure to be some other way. All while wanting you to stay the way you are because of the passion. It's an impossible situation that leads to some horrible stuff sometimes. Anyway, I totally agree when you love each other for who you really are that's when it's truly special and unbreakable.

Dear K,

Stanza four is extremely powerful to me. Seems like that is daily life at the moment and it’s exhausting. I find I never fail in admiration of your ability to weave sexy, sadness, sauciness, and sweetness into your work. You make it look simple but it’s not. It’s a real feat. And yes, her posture is terrific but the shoes! Totally dig ‘em! Well done. H🌷

That is one of my favorites probably for obvious reasons. I know my chaos and strangeness often shows in my writing. But it's definitely a thrilling ride, you are never going to get bored. lol And I am great at dealing with the blood stains now. It feels like a constant fight, it even feels that way here which is sad and difficult but I guess that's just life sometimes. Sexy, sadness, sauciness, and sweetness - Wow, I really love that. That's definitely a combination I know well. I am happy to hear it is reflected in my writing too. Making it look easy is such an incredible compliment from such an amazing writer. My writing is kind of something that just happens. Trying to write is a great way for me not to write. lol Haha, I love the shoes and the stockings, so perfect... And yes the posture too. ;) Totally dig it all. It represented exactly what I wanted to. ;)

Oh yeah it does, it's perfect. ;)
You know all about nurses, I hope you have run into some naughty ones. lol One's you wanted to stick instead of them sticking you with such a big needle. :p I love you can see the sexy and erotic in this and that outfit would raise anyone's pulse right. Damn right! I am going to grab you and pull you in. :p

Layers of lust filled pleasures lays the darkness and the pain. Perfectly stated, that definitely describes things so well.

Generally there are many meanings if you really look. Often it's easy to see one and totally miss the others. And so often some things are vague by design but they are there. There is a lot of truth to be found, at least my truths in regards to my life and things that happened to me and how they shaped me. The passion will always show and I definitely can convey the erotic part of things strongly. I love that you think I do it so well. ;)

Yes, I actually see it as both. Dying to live and Living to die. Both carry a lot of significance. There are definitely chains that we always must deal with and sometimes they can be very difficult and heavy. They can tighten and strangle too.

Ah, chaos will always be part of me and definitely passion filled thrills, an entire amusement park set in the darkness. I definitely love that so many people like to come the amusement park and try out the new rides. :p

'Damage my head trying' LOL Oh God, how true that is. There is no deciphering that and yet it makes sense to me. :p

And I think you see things very clearly. Stuck in darkness and embracing it. Yes!

Sexy, dark, and honest is a combination I know well.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I love that.

Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to. lol That syringe is going to hurt.
And I think the look on her face says it's all. Up to no good for sure! lol

Well, that nurse looks very intensely focused on her work! Just like your poem, focused on the patient's wants and needs and passions and thoughts.... but what does the nurse want..? I wonder. Even caregivers need care.

I love the idea of writing a new hymn book. I'm working on it...

Another deep & passionate write!
❤️k

Haha, oh yeah she definitely focused and totally up to something... painful. lol Always focused on the patient's needs and wants, passions and thoughts. And it's really nice when the reader can see that so clearly too. ;) They might get what they want and need too, I hope. Because I am the best damn nurse ever. lol Ah, what does the nurse want... She wants to fix everything. And that requires a lot of passion, and I have that. So yeah, that's the perfect outfit for getting what she wants and needs. ;) Giving what the patient desperately desires too and that just fixes everything. :p At the very lease you forget about everything else. lol 'Even caregivers need care.' On a more serious note, definitely; sometimes caregivers have so little help and it can be so hard. It's something that so often is just not there and over time it really takes a toll.

Ah, the first person to mention the hymn book. I thought that might seem strange but that's how it came to me so that's just how it is. Writing one... awesome!

Deep and passionate always, I know you are too k. ;) <3

Dear, Kristina
I identify with just about everything you mention in this enjoyable piece. This passage pretty much sums up my life right now, "You want to reboot me, but I am stuck." Brava, goddess BD🌹

Hey GW, it's so great to see you and get your thoughts. I really love that you came by to see the nurse. ;) You know she always wants what's best for you even if she is going to stick with a huge needle. Sometimes you need to feel the pain to get to the real pleasure. But not to worry, the nurse knows exactly what to do. It's nice you could identify with the piece and that means you likely got a lot out of it which I love. Ah, so often life wants to reboot us and that can represent people, situations, circumstances, and everything else. And again maybe we think what is wrong with me or maybe we know what is 'wrong' with us. But so often those same things that want to reboot us are the very things that stop us from doing so. Life is so ironic sometimes isn't it. Still you will reboot, and then you run and perform so much better. It can be such an upgrade and open the door to so many new experiences and people in your life. So just remember you will get there and the more chances you take the faster it will come. Run some new applications that get you out and about and experiencing life, doing things you love. The rest will come.

Living thru the pain the blood excites...anyone see a wet nurse

Living thru the pain certainly opens you up to feel everything more intensely. I know things that happened to me did, they impacted me in a profound way for life. I am not saying that's a good thing at all trust me, just that it's part of who I am now and always will be for better or worse. Some people seem drawn to me so who knows. I don't know what it would be like if those things didn't happen anymore, I can't really disassociate from them. Anyway, things that perhaps should not excite me always will now, perhaps that's really messed up but it is what it is. Anyway, a wet nurse; I surprised this is the first comment to mention that. ;) And yes the pain can excite the blood in the deepest ways. But anyway, when I am a nurse; I am always wet but it's just one of an infinite number of fantasies, and incredible number of realities too. (never been an actual nurse but I have performed the role in other ways and when I do... ) I am the best damn nurse ever. ;)

Ah yes! I thought of a nurse immediately although it all just kind of forms in the chaos of my mind. That's so true, nurses are the ones that make the patient feel comfortable and looked after. Doctor's often aren't much for bedside manner. A nurse can be so comforting but also SEXY as hell. ;) And as she stitches the body you want to stitch into hers sometimes. But stitched together experiences is something that is shared at a very deep level, combining both of your souls and merging these stories into something new. This combined pain and sharing that can mean so much. It can be a treatment that you never expected, kind of like poetry. And that deeply shared pain of experiences can knit a pleasure that goes so much deeper. You hold each other together in this embrace of bodies that opens sensation and feelings that most can only dream of. Dark lustful codependency is different from other forms. Somehow you can build each other up and those experiences that ripped your soul to shreds put it back together again. People that have not experienced those things cannot fully understand but some experiences intertwine in their darkness. And when someone breaks your body and mind, and you survive it's always different. When you wanted to die and yet you wanted to live more. And that intense desire to hang on despite it all changes you. It's opens you... And often the pain becomes the passion, and the passion becomes the pain. Everything is just intense. And in the chaos you find peace, and in the strange, you find your new normal.

Hi Kristina.
I love how the second stanza plunged me right into your darkness.
There is a chaotic yet peaceful flow to this, similar to when a person finally decides to relinquish control to the person they desire.
I didn’t want the poem to end, even in its pleas to be released.
Very well done. Love this.

Hey Mary, it’s so great to have you back and know you are okay. Perhaps it’s fortunate I didn’t realize what was going on till later so I didn’t worry about you. :) I can tell you really read the second stanza in a way intended seeing the real darkness of it and being plunged into it. I am really happy when the reader feels a part of my writing. It’s always from the heart and soul so I hope that is felt and I feel like that’s what you are telling me. Sometimes chaos can become your peace in some sort of  ironic way that perhaps feels like an alternate reality. And fulfilling a persons deepest darkest desires and relinquishing control to do so definitely has a way of making all your suffering and struggles just melt away doesn’t it? ‘I didn’t want the poem to end, even in the please to be released’ Wow, that is such an incredible compliment. Makes me want to pull you back in right now. ;)

Is it bad that I understood this so well? Or maybe we can be pen pals in hell. Idk, all I do know is the my heart aches, my soul feels elation, and I am in awe of your prose. Multi-layered, deep, flowing, involving, magnetic, are just a few of the adjectives that come to mind.

That’s not bad at all APPS, I have come to expect that from you always. ;) We can definitely be pen pals in hell and even hell on earth too. But it’s a hell filled with crazy passion, and a witch and a shaman too. :p Heart aches and soul feels elation, now that’s some powerful feelings; just as they should be when you are dealing with intense passion and magic, darkness and pain too.  Multi-layered and deep always, just like hell. Flowing like the ocean and magnetic like the moon. So many adjectives and I always love how you spin them into something magical. Makes a witch feel like she needs to call on even more powerful magic and hone her skills. ;)

Time to do a restart, press the F8 key.  Fettered 8, bound on your back to all four corners. You now in safe mode. Check all the hardware (Pinch, rub, slap, probe, inspect, etc) before checking the software responses. Registry corrupted, some keystrokes to your operating system - Oh look at her purr. The blank stare of into the blue, now has vivid refection and display.  Time to plug into the USB and do some diagnostics before proceeding with a hard connection upgrade.  

The nurse, Oh, please be in-network!!!  : )

Haha, fettered 8 bound on all four corners, damn right! that's exactly it, isn't it and I know where your mind is and I like it. Definitely not safe mode, this is diagnostic mode. Check all the hardware, of yeah I am very good at keeping the hardware, hard and checking it out thoroughly and in every way. Ah the software is very important too, I am pretty soft to the touch... The registry has recorded so many ways to cause pleasure and pain, making you want more; desperate for more. Until the system crashes and needs rebooting again. Oh the sweet pain that needs to be experienced all over again until the next one. The port is ready to accept it's punishment. There is always an upgrade waiting, that's supposed to fix everything but only breaks it more. But sometimes breaking can feel so good. ;)

Haha, yeah that's going to get expensive otherwise.

I do have to wonder what's in the syringe. I have always been interested in medicine and healing script but there are many reasons for that. Including my Mom's remissions and relapses. Sadly I just wasn't able to put in the time and money for medical school but I do love my job and what I do. Saving lives in stressful situations is definitely a skill. Saving lives is always stressful I suppose but in the situations you are referring to it's something entirely different. When saving lives might get you killed that's a sacrifice in and of itself. So yeah back to wondering about this cure... and what I would be injected with... :p

Hmmm, I'll settle for a blanket bath if you don't know what you're doing with the stitching! Erm, that's rather a big needle, don't you think? ;-)

Not to worry I can stitch the blanket to you and give you a bath. lol Of course I know what I am doing damnit! I am the best at what I do. :p And bigger is better as they say. So if I am going to stick you I want to make it count, you know be as painful as possible but fix everything. lol Still, everything is about the patient and his needs. I know exactly what you need always because I am really good like that. So just lay down and ... * nevermind, innocent look * :p

Wow Kristina, this has depth and such a strong binding tie. Too often are we trying to help others while we're still in the healing process. Perhaps our love and attraction toward others in pain drives us to sort of heal together, as if understanding one another, but that too can be dangerous, especially when "Thoughts are chaotic and strange".

You certainly raise the bar in these expressive writes. Thank you for sharing.

I was pretty happy people could get something from my often strange way of thinking and assembling things. I wasn't quite sure what the response would be on this one. But this is how I think and express things so it is what it is. It is indeed difficult to stitch someone's wounds when you are bleeding. I always try anyway though but sometimes it only transfers their wounds to me. And I spend the rest of the time trying to stop my bleeding. Often the most tortured are drawn to each other and sometimes that can be the most beautiful thing. Still it is a dangerous combination sometimes too. I have found that so often people are drawn to chaotic and strange all while telling you to be less so. But that's life. For me, I am just me and there are some things I just can't change. But I will always strive to better myself and others in the best ways I can. I am extremely expressive Wally. ;) I guess you know that. Thank you for the incredible feedback.

Sexy and erotic as you do so well while also deep and insightful and hopefully a therapeutic release too :) Always enjoy your writing..been away a while (life bs) but happy to delve into your words and world some more. But do know you are not alone too :) I too have a membership card with "Insanity.com" (ocd/bipolar) I'll put it out there because I don't care what people think.

I love all things sexy and erotic, they reflect my mind, body, and soul. Deep and insightful with so many different meanings, some that no doubt are only known by me. But it is therapeutic in some ways as an escape from some really difficult things. I am glad you are back, sorry about the life bs; I have been dealing with some very difficult things myself. Still I am glad you could delve into my world here. I suppose it's nice to know you are not alone. Ah, my insanity would take so long to explain. ;) But I definitely know OCD. You may have noticed my posting times for example. lol But it's way more complicated than that. I do know all the best therapies though. ;)