the crush.

i think of you,
and i lose all sense of thought,
but at the same time,
i think of everything to be thought of.

feeling like this is new to me,
i’m used to having the confidence to speak,
the boldness to talk,
the ability to think.

you make me nervous,
and i hate that,
why do you make me so nervous,
what about you causes me to be speechless?

is this what it feels like,
to truly like someone,
to become speechless in their presence,
to lose all sense of thought when they come to mind?

in all honesty,
i’ve no idea if this is a true crush,
if this is what everyone speaks so fondly of,
to me it feels quite strange.

i suppose strange is the wrong word,
it feels wrong,
to think of you in the deep of night,
to long for you to think of me the same.

but who am i to say,
maybe this is normal,
maybe it’s fine,
i suppose this is just what they call “the crush”.