Isn't it (Not) Romantic?

i am a woman
and I don't like the word 'romantic'
sorry Hallmark
 
sure, i like some things
that are 'romantic'
the color pink (light pink, silvery pink)
lace
beaches
holding hands
kisses
massages
love
 
but i dislike the fundamentalism
of the word 'romantic'
with its mandated Valentines Days
pre-conceived notions
expectations
disappointment
budget-breaking engagement rings
bridezillas ("my special day is ruined!")
and many 'shoulds'
 
i once happily shared
with a group of women
what my boyfriend had gotten me
for our first Valentine's Day together
 
i was launching a small business
with little starting capital
the good quality all-in-one
copier / fax / printer
was just what i needed
and a surprise
since i was perfectly happy
with our plan to just go out for Thai
 
i hadn't asked for it (or anything else)
i hadn't dropped microaggressive hints
he'd just figured out 
what i needed
i felt cared about
loved
even protected
what could be better?
 
the loudest of the women went first
OMG, are you KIDDING?
I would be soooooo pissed!
the other women chimed in the same
laughing
 
wow
...really?
just for fun
i asked
what SHOULD (ugh!) he have gotten me?
 
he should have gotten you jewelry said one
nice jewelry she qualified
he should have
at least taken you for a romantic dinner
at a good ($$$) restaurant 
said another
i got silk lingerie
smirked the one with the best body
 
i once heard
a proposal
for a 'romantic' holiday for men:
an annual Steak and Blowjobs Day
the week after Valentine's
wonder what those women
would do with their shoulds then?
 
here are some things I think are 'romantic':
just having fun shopping together at Costco
laughing together
reading a great part of a poem or story aloud-
because you know they'll love it
adoring pets together
texts in the middle of the day
taking care of each other when sick

watching the sun rise or set together
 
without thinking of it as romantic