un[speak]able

Sadly we get old and pass on
Great write gorgeous
Love and light
Ron xx

Umm .... yes, that's true.... I definitely agree, there  
 
 
Although it's not the case here. Perhaps this piece might have been too ambiguous....hmmm... I'll have to think on that.  
 
I do thank you for the comments, Ron .  

Much obliged,  
🌹 - B

When we get old and pass on our legacy is left.  Keep on writing you strong beautiful smart sexy woman.

That is also true.... I appreciate that sentiment.

Thanks Francisco
🌹

It's been extremely difficult to try and respond to these comments, so I apologize for the delay. Thank you for understanding the intensity and the space I was making for varying thought processes. Your words are helpful (beyond, really) and I'm so appreciative 🙏🏻

Thank you, T.


(very much)
🌹 - B

Being ghosted emotionally, not having closure, that feeling of not having been worthy enough to someone else to deserve a response in their eyes.....

Questions of the micro incursions that pile up on top of abuse, neglect, abandonment....part of this despair is its universality. Civilization?

This was visceral.

Ohh don't we all just think of it as standard practice..... right?!.! (I say with huge amounts of sarcasm)  Sorry for the smartassery.... it's just so effed up to treat people like that, it's hard for me to wrap my head around why it's so easy for others to, without a second thought....  

Thanks for the comments. I definitely appreciate your mindset and I agree that all the bad, heinous shitty ways we treat each other, are definitely universal; crossing all barriers, indeed.

This was just my own reconciliation of deep scars that probably won't ever heal and a survivors guilt that almost makes me breathless, every time I think about it.... even years later.  

I'm so glad you that you could feel the visceral aura within... It was a tough piece for me to put out into the world.  
(Much thanks for saying so..)  

Regards,  
🌹 - B

We all have our own processes. They might work for us alone.

I know now that I have changed my sense of reality. I'm not a victim; I am a volunteer.

Every response, every nuance of attention, every particle of resistance.....all of it from now on... is what I volunteer for.

I chose my consequences. I choose my pathways by my responses. I decide what I volunteer for.

Hey there, RT,  
These comments had me back on my heels a bit, really pondering and turning over in my mind your words, outlook and ultimately your life decision. Thoughts of deeply diving into what it would take to make that conscious decision to change one's entire reality. I really sat with it....thinking.  It's definitely something that would be of benefit, to refuse victimization and depending upon the personal situation, rewire one's self, one's reality.  
I can't even imagine the sense of freedom that produces, volunteering vs victim hood. Making that choice of personal pathways of response and volunteering to choose the consequences, not have them thrusted upon you. This might be difficult to adjust to but the longer one was able to keep that reality a reality, it would make such a world of difference. It's the learning curve, that might be tricky.... Yet I suppose that's the case and like anything else you might try to utilize the techniques of to improve mental health, happiness .... and life, in general  
 
To me, this is bravery, incarnate. It's having the courage to revamp your thinking....A real overhaul.  
 
It's your last line....  
 
"I decide what I volunteer for" that rings so very loudly and truly resonates... deep.  
 
Thank you for opening up and replying back. I really needed to read that tonight—  I just didn't know how much I needed it, until I read it.  
 
All my warmest gratitude,  
🌹 - B

Exactly....not easy... real boundaries...letting others choose their own consequences. I shut down Facebook and got 3 hours more life every day. So, I shut down each layer of unnecessary stuff, and stopped anxiety. I shut down toxic relationships and got my sense of wellbeing back. Every step I took to lessen stress was a load off my back. Time, energy, all of the areas I was bleeding out.  I was all volunteered out. My identity was emptiness. Not in a Zen way, but in terms of life energy. Don't feel guilty for getting healthy. It's not selfish to survive. Wealth is a state of personal satisfaction. I volunteer for joy. Campfires are like winning the emotional lottery. Walk towards your center. These are my self-talk every day.

You really made a substantial impact on my thought processes and meditative contemplations.

I am in the midst of fine tuning my next steps, or rather my choices ahead and discovering my own driven pathways. I can't thank you enough for opening up my thinking.... I wrote a poem today which I know is the direct result of my continued thoughts in reference to your comments here.
 Thank you, again.
🌹-B

Great read, I enjoyed it allot, Thanks for sharing.

I am so grateful for your comments and I'm delighted you enjoyed the read. Thank you for taking the time to leave me your thoughts. It means a lot to me.

Warm regards,
🌹 - B

always excited when i see a new poem you have posted. a joy to read, always.

You honor me with such a kind and heartfelt comment, Gary.  
 
I can't thank you enough for that. I needed a little sunshine in my day today, and you just happened to shine it down upon me— I'm very appreciate of that warmth.  
 
Regards and best wishes,  
🌹 - B

Susan, this incredibly powerful poem is piercing to my heart.
Your vivid emotional write sparks all of my senses.
Literally all of my sensibilities are unequivocally firing by your impassioned verse.
I still have the most difficult time processing a tremendous loss of my own good friend to suicide.
I always seem succumb to those terrible mind racking moments of my personal loss.
It happens to me a countless number of times without ever any understanding, the why??
Your poetry deeply resonates and transcends me into the essence of your familiar emotional journey.
This is a true testament to your power with your written word in poetry
Time never heals this wound but your masterful words add a supportive perspective that tames my insanity.
Your profound words are a therapeutic wonderment of poetic healing.
Thank you for sharing this very impactful and poignant write my dear beautiful friend.

I am going to try and reply here quickly, before I start bawling and can't reign it in....even though 'quickly' is the antithesis of my usual... (I know!)    
 
Your comments cut into my very flesh, heart and soul, Ron. It was like reading my own journal. So, I thank you very much for being open and sharing your history with me. I am saddened and sorry for your loss. I know it's one of the most difficult things to try and reconcile. I have had enormous challenges to try and make heads or tails, in understanding even a tiny bit and I'm STILL not sure I will ever be able to. To say I get it means that I really really do.  
   
Being a survivor of this type of loss is hellish and I just hope you've been able to get some help, to potentially develop some valuable coping skills, that might lessen the ache, if even slightly.... it really does help and make a difference.    
   
I am so grateful for you, all your kindness and for our connected bond. Our friendship is something that I think we both needed, to perhaps help each other across the miles, even at random intervals .... It certainly feels like it's truly a gift.  
   
This piece was beyond difficult and I'm relieved that you can fully grasp my mindset and space from which I was occupying in my head when I wrote it. I take great comfort in that fact....    
   
All my warmest appreciation and heartfelt gratitude, dear Ron  
   
I feel incredibly lucky to have read your words this evening...  
Be well and stay safe,    
🌹 - 💙  
xo    
–S

Wow! Another masterpiece of creativity that engages the thought processes. Hugs to my Princess of word power, Oral. xoxo

Thanks for reading and for the lovely sentiments, Oral. I appreciate you taking the time time. I'm humbly grateful you could feel a small sense of power in my words. That really makes my night.  

Much love and gratitude, dear friend 🙏🏻  
🌹 B

And it’s a tough and bold write but one that really says how fragile loss can make us.

Thank you for sharing

Fragile, like butterfly wings, indeed ..... You never know what tomorrow might bring, Walter.

I am sure you've felt and totally get that.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me. I an so grateful and deeply appreciative.

🌹 - B

The struggle is real when we have to move on without the one who makes life worthwhile... the fall brings the drear and the ache of not just the body but the soul and the heart

It's completely life changing... In all aspects —Mind, body and soul.  
 
That ache and sense of loss is palpable and something that needs processing, or it drags you under.... Drowning, via a slow, excruciatingly painful demise - yourself.  
 
It's difficult, to say the least.  
 
Thanks for the sentiments of solidarity, Tim. I very much appreciate you reaching out with those comments and I deeply cherish them.  
Warm regards,  
 
🌹 - B

The pain and the wish of things being different are not ambiguous-to me at least.
Well done.

hugs,
buddhakitty.

I feel your comments to my very core, bk. I can only add that I'm selfishly grateful that I'm not alone in that particular understanding.


All my warmest gratitude, beautiful kitty!

🌹-B
x

A very detailed poem with cutting imagery. The picture goes almost perfectly with the work.

Thank you so much for your poignant and honest feedback, my new friend 🙏🏻

I take great care to find an image that I feel can really accentuate and not distract, so your comments are truly appreciated.

Much obliged and always a pleasure ✨
🌹 - 💙
B

dear Blue Velvete

over the years as a volunteer i've facilitated a myriad of groups for the underserved
where i've assisted people to learn to express their authenticity
through composing poetry as a healing process

one of  the locations was at an Institute For The Study and Practice Of Nonviolence
i had two separate groups on different evenings
one was for people who had lost family or friends to gang violence
the other was for gang members

an essential element of my teaching was to impress upon people
that they had spent
every day of their life
living/acting out a piece of theater
that they had written through their choices
and that they all had the ability to create a new piece of theater
and begin to live it when ever they wished

when they would say they didn't believe they had the ability to do that
i would respond by showing them that they had a bought a ticket every day of their life to the play they had created
which proved they had the ability to successfully write a new one



thankyuuu for you sharing your truths


a warm smile
silent lotus

Wow, silent_lotus!

I am completely humbled by the sharing of your personal experience and work with others to teach them options for safe and healthy self expression.

It was an impactful share and left an impression upon me that I doubt that I will forget.

I deeply appreciate that and I wholeheartedly thank you for reaching out and taking that time.
It's meaningful and not taken lightly by me.

I wish you all the warmest and best wishes ahead for the holiday season,

Much love and respect,
🌹 - 💙
B