deepundergroundpoetry.com
Barfly
She'd sip from life a cocktail glass
A happy hour with dainty pass
In corset-bound morality.
In youth horizons stretched across
The endless possibilities
That even now she contemplates.
Her eyes that scan across the bar
Beseeching gent who gazes back
Awaiting what she'll order next.
And has she now become a book
With dog-eared pages memorized
Scenarios that never change.
A customer has just walked in
He's thirsty just around the grin
While planting pants upon a stool.
And as he reeks of turpentine
He hails the man who has the time
To serve another at his keep.
She bows her head to light a nail
Another for her coffin lid
And drinks the tumbler full of ale.
Published 7th Dec 2016
| Edited 16th Jul 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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comments 18
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7th Dec 2016 11:42am
7th Dec 2016 12:36pm
I thank you kindly, darling Grace;
I like the parallel you give,
and how I always trust your thoughts,
the gentleness of their embrace.<3
I like the parallel you give,
and how I always trust your thoughts,
the gentleness of their embrace.<3
7th Dec 2016 3:30pm
you paint such accurate pictures with your words... I've been in that bar... excellent writing, jade!
geoff
geoff
7th Dec 2016 6:43pm
You take us there with your amazing descriptions, Jade, nicely done.
And this:
'She bows her head to light a nail
Another for her coffin lid
And drinks the tumbler full of ale.'
Was the perfect closer...
And this:
'She bows her head to light a nail
Another for her coffin lid
And drinks the tumbler full of ale.'
Was the perfect closer...
8th Dec 2016 4:27am
Dear Kasai, it's such an honor to have you visit and share your thoughts that humble me... happily.
8th Dec 2016 6:38am
The final stanza was quite painful, it is so terribly hard to watch someone drink themselves to death, you painted it very well. You portrayed the pain so well, Jade.
~anonshadow😏
~anonshadow😏
8th Dec 2016 7:20am
Thank you, dear Anon, for those thoughts so true. I always appreciate when a reader feels the life in my ink.
8th Dec 2016 12:42pm
that bar's in my neighborhood,
all the lonely women find it;
it's an artful analysis...
all the lonely women find it;
it's an artful analysis...
8th Dec 2016 1:08pm
Thank you so much, John, for the insight you always share with others; both in your comments, and your writes.
8th Dec 2016 8:04pm
8th Dec 2016 10:26pm
Bukowski! Ohhh that's such an amazing comparison to have my poem linked to in any way, shape or form, thank you dear Ahavati!
9th Dec 2016 3:53pm
9th Dec 2016 9:21pm
12th Dec 2016 7:20pm
16th Dec 2016 6:54am
Sorry for the lag, I just now came upon your reply. I adore Faye! Maybe one day I'll get to see the film. My personal library includes books by Bukowski.
10th Dec 2016 8:38pm
I get the feeling of the downward spiral shared by many drinkers in many dives. Reminds me of the days I was planted on the stool. I was always "thirsty just around the grin." This one's top shelf Jade. Good luck with the comp!
10th Dec 2016 9:19pm
Thank you so much, my crowfly friend. I hope you've had a much improved life since those barstool days. And your read of this piece touches me deeply.
