This Hasn't Been My Year

Don’t give me a chance to blink
I’ll be a dozen steps behind
Degrading all my hopes
With pessimistic thoughts

God is a dead man
Heaven has metamorphosized
With my beautiful purgatory
And a surefire hell below

You’re all strangers to me
Any touching gesture will be taken
As an act of war, then I’ll aim
Straight and true

The only thing I wanted so much
Was a match in this darkness
But the flame went out
Now I’m in blind, frozen agony

I hope this agony stretches far
In every direction, for all who see clearly
To be forced back to where I stand
But my misery will hate the company