Submissions by nihilistcumdragon
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
LOVE POEM
Published
11th Jul 2015 00:09am
11th Jul 2015 00:09am
Post breakup thoughts
I wish to stop trying to appear interesting to new people
I am not, none of us are
Life begins and ends again every day
within our hollow eyes
I will not try to solicit your respect
I do not want to waste my breath
Yes, I am letting my bitterness speak for me today
But I agree
I will write out my anxieties,
drink gross alcohol because it's available,
eat excessively and refuse to shower
I will not think of where I'd take someone on a date,
what I'm looking for in a fuckbuddy,
or what it means to recover from letting go ...
I am not, none of us are
Life begins and ends again every day
within our hollow eyes
I will not try to solicit your respect
I do not want to waste my breath
Yes, I am letting my bitterness speak for me today
But I agree
I will write out my anxieties,
drink gross alcohol because it's available,
eat excessively and refuse to shower
I will not think of where I'd take someone on a date,
what I'm looking for in a fuckbuddy,
or what it means to recover from letting go ...
496 reads
0 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
6th Jul 2015 5:59am
6th Jul 2015 5:59am
Burn me down
Content warning for mention of self harm*
Every night is the same.
There's plenty to blame.
It all goes back to my depression.
I'm traumatized by the act of letting go
of someone
I could have spent my night with,
even the rest of my life with
They were that kind of impressionable lover
Don't even have to say the "lover"
I can't go to sleep
because I see their laugh in the trees
and the scene's so familiar
when I'm on my knees
trying to hold back from
the hidden bottles
and alcoholism,
trying to hold back ...
Every night is the same.
There's plenty to blame.
It all goes back to my depression.
I'm traumatized by the act of letting go
of someone
I could have spent my night with,
even the rest of my life with
They were that kind of impressionable lover
Don't even have to say the "lover"
I can't go to sleep
because I see their laugh in the trees
and the scene's so familiar
when I'm on my knees
trying to hold back from
the hidden bottles
and alcoholism,
trying to hold back ...
507 reads
1 Comment
SELF POEM
Published
28th Jun 2015 00:06am
28th Jun 2015 00:06am
Distraction
I'm trying to occupy my mind with distractions
so I don't wind up dead,
[I'm] pretending like sex is salvation
I'll rise from my existential daze
in afterglow bliss
No, I could have sex
but it wouldn't change much
In fact now I'm feeling distant
from the distance
I'd probably leave in the middle of the night
skipping the morning talk,
breakfast and pleasantness
I'd just be doing an act that
usually brings pleasure
I guess I can self medicate
with sex too
It doesn't hurt my liver
and the aftertaste of his...
so I don't wind up dead,
[I'm] pretending like sex is salvation
I'll rise from my existential daze
in afterglow bliss
No, I could have sex
but it wouldn't change much
In fact now I'm feeling distant
from the distance
I'd probably leave in the middle of the night
skipping the morning talk,
breakfast and pleasantness
I'd just be doing an act that
usually brings pleasure
I guess I can self medicate
with sex too
It doesn't hurt my liver
and the aftertaste of his...
460 reads
0 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
16th Jun 2015 4:57am
16th Jun 2015 4:57am
Don't come back to America. I love you too much.
Since you've got me lying in bed
emotionally drowsy,
I've noticed the ordinary objects
lying around my room
Coppertone sunscreen
a pink handkerchief
the pills I refuse to take
to alleviate my depression
I scratch my filthy head
and I try to ponder something
exciting
I just repeat self deprecation
and nearly convince myself to leave the house
I've seemed to have forgotten half my vocabulary
at a moment's notice
because I've tried to unlearn
everything we told each other
It doesn't make the...
emotionally drowsy,
I've noticed the ordinary objects
lying around my room
Coppertone sunscreen
a pink handkerchief
the pills I refuse to take
to alleviate my depression
I scratch my filthy head
and I try to ponder something
exciting
I just repeat self deprecation
and nearly convince myself to leave the house
I've seemed to have forgotten half my vocabulary
at a moment's notice
because I've tried to unlearn
everything we told each other
It doesn't make the...
503 reads
1 Comment
EROTIC POEM
Published
13th Jun 2015 7:27pm
13th Jun 2015 7:27pm
Shame for three
Perhaps irony is dangerous
I don't trust strangers
but I trust strangers in bed
to be truthful about their genitals
The aftershock from the collision
was swift
My knees shook for an hour
Last night,
when I pissed out tequila it burned
It burned
What kind of a world
do we live in
that my best luck comes
when Mercury is in retrograde
But why would it be news
even if the test comes up positive
Another slut gets chlamydia
Another couple lied
My pussy isn't wet
It sobs to itself
As I drink...
I don't trust strangers
but I trust strangers in bed
to be truthful about their genitals
The aftershock from the collision
was swift
My knees shook for an hour
Last night,
when I pissed out tequila it burned
It burned
What kind of a world
do we live in
that my best luck comes
when Mercury is in retrograde
But why would it be news
even if the test comes up positive
Another slut gets chlamydia
Another couple lied
My pussy isn't wet
It sobs to itself
As I drink...
591 reads
1 Comment
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
12th Jun 2015 3:36am
12th Jun 2015 3:36am
Scary
There is so much to be afraid of in this world
that it's hard to call something an irrational fear.
I'm not sure what to be more afraid of-
loneliness or love,
queer statistics or the streets at night,
the law or the police...or senators
Inner peace is so hard to achieve
when the external stimuli is so troubling
In fact, I don't know that I want inner peace
If it requires me to become complacent,
oblivious, or silent,
then I never want to experience peace..
it sounds like a disgusting thing
Well, besides the danger
that...
that it's hard to call something an irrational fear.
I'm not sure what to be more afraid of-
loneliness or love,
queer statistics or the streets at night,
the law or the police...or senators
Inner peace is so hard to achieve
when the external stimuli is so troubling
In fact, I don't know that I want inner peace
If it requires me to become complacent,
oblivious, or silent,
then I never want to experience peace..
it sounds like a disgusting thing
Well, besides the danger
that...
570 reads
0 Comments
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