Poetry competition CLOSED 30th January 2020 8:50pm
WINNER
Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
View Profile Poems by Jade-Pandora
trophy
RUNNERS-UP: snugglebuck and BigG

Go to page:

ROAST, the RUTHLESS

clewluss
SMOOKY
Thought Provoker
Joined 22nd Apr 2014
Forum Posts: 281

Poetry Contest

Critique Overboard
UPDATE  THIS COMP WAS DBL POSTED,
so two winners.

Have you grown weary of receiving Overly sweet comments praising your art?
By posting your poem here, you realize you have entered CRITIQUE THUNDERDOME, a no holds barred rip fest of your work.
But there is one catch. Before you cut up somebodies poem posted here in this competition, YOU MUST FIRST POST a poem of your own, welcoming harsh critique.



This thread is only for a very few,
If not to your taste well, you knowl.

Also please squeeze in a touch of humor, and self depracation while roasting.
Ultimately I hope this all amongst friends, where we learn and laugh and love each other all the Moore.

With that said,
HAVE AT IT


PoetsRevenge
Dangerous Mind
United States 29awards
Joined 30th June 2016
Forum Posts: 749

It's a cool idea, can the poems submitted be funny? Also, what are the criteria for judging the winner, best poem, best critique responses or both? Are the critiques to be posted in this thread or on the poem pages?

Ahavati
Tams
Tyrant of Words
United States 122awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 16703

Why are there two threads of this?

clewluss
SMOOKY
Thought Provoker
Joined 22nd Apr 2014
Forum Posts: 281

Ahavati, I just want to take a moment to relish in the very idea that you feel
CONFRUSED,
for it is not everyday a self confident
Highly prized lady like yourself is found in such a tizzy.
So I'll have to get back to you...

clewluss
SMOOKY
Thought Provoker
Joined 22nd Apr 2014
Forum Posts: 281

Hey PoetsRevenge, take this thread where the
Spirit leads you, I will take note of your particular angle
Just DO it

Ahavati
Tams
Tyrant of Words
United States 122awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 16703

clewluss said:Ahavati, I just want to take a moment to relish in the very idea that you feel
CONFRUSED,
for it is not everyday a self confident
Highly prized lady like yourself is found in such a tizzy.
So I'll have to get back to you...


* Flips hair *

I am human; I promise.

EdibleWords
Tyrant of Words
9awards
Joined 7th Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 3004

Need Mo Whiz, Dumb

I tol u
Yur back-wurd

Get smarts
No bumazz
Smartur

I C yew
Dats wear u gunna
B
If U can spale

Dis is stoop-id

Tryin ta talk 2U
Written by EdibleWords
Go To Page  

BigG
Twisted Dreamer
United Kingdom
Joined 26th Nov 2019
Forum Posts: 11

Jog on

Booze filled body Sweety and clammy
I lay next to you Pristine and calm
Once was lovers Such magical times
Our bodies once tangled But my head's so mangled
I think I should leave before I do you harm,

The Voices have ceased calling my name
But all I remember are the words you said
On my way to rehab I wish you was dead
Is this the life we must carry and share
Just because we have a child now their.


Written by BigG
Go To Page  

Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
United States 154awards
Joined 9th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 5134

I Have A Plan

 
 
I simply said ‘I have a plan’,
‘Twas off the record, did I say?
It’s early and I just began,
Don’t want the muse to go astray.
 
It doesn’t mean we’re on a clock,
I simply said ‘I have a plan’.
It’s promising no writer’s block,
In fact you may become a fan.
 
No guarantee it’s better than
The competition’s good intent.
I simply said ‘I have a plan’,
I’m not revealing where it went.
 
So hold your horses, wait a spell,
Watch’d pots don’t boi’l says a pan.
A magic potion? who can tell,
I simply said ‘I have a plan’.    
 
   
   
( a non-entry )
Written by Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
Go To Page  


EdibleWords
Tyrant of Words
9awards
Joined 7th Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 3004




Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
United States 154awards
Joined 9th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 5134


🐾

Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
United States 154awards
Joined 9th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 5134

I Never

 

I never get depressed but I’ll suffer,
A year-long’s worth of months go sailing by.
Christmas as my woes are stocking stuffers
To hang around my waist like pecan pie.

I wish that’s all it was, I hardly eat,
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer.
A day of letting go would be a treat,
God help if the remedy proves tougher.

The devil how I work for my supper,
It’s never gonna matter anyhow.
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer,
Someday I’ll take on less than I do now.

And yet I wonder if I’ll find the time—
Like cigarettes, will quitting be rougher?
Cold turkey writing verse I’ll miss the rhyme,
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer.

Written by Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
Go To Page  

snugglebuck
Dangerous Mind
United States 77awards
Joined 3rd Feb 2014
Forum Posts: 1873

Depressed

(In response to Jade’s "I Never")  

Now that the Christmas solstice,  
Suffering has come to past  
Prepare for the Spring Equinox  
Tiss the time of depressing Lent  
 
When the Yuletide season  
Of painful kayas is replaced  
With boring days of morose  
When the soul is oppressed  
 
Then, like Christ during Passover  
Enjoy your last tasteless supper  
Of bitter herbs and boiled meat  
Before we walk the trail of somber  
 
Strolling the Garden of Gethsemane  
Among the fruiting Pecan trees  
Realize the little pain we suffer  
Then going through life gloomily    
 
So, take up your cross to climb,  
Calvary in determination    
After your suffer crucifixion  
And your subsequent resurrection  
 
You’ll discover it is better  
To experience pain and abide  
Then to live in an endlessly  
Unhappy and depressed  
Written by snugglebuck
Go To Page  

Kinkpoet
Tyrant of Words
United States 11awards
Joined 9th May 2019
Forum Posts: 1067

Related submission no longer exists.

Kinkpoet
Tyrant of Words
United States 11awards
Joined 9th May 2019
Forum Posts: 1067

Response to Need Mo Whiz, Dumb:

R yew talking two me?
lern tu spel
U maroon!

Go to page:
Go to: