Romance

And it's Jesus' fault too.
He set me up.
Got sick of me being a female Morrissey
    full of (fake) apathy  
        and emotional nihilism
            to the point of
                  not.
                  ever.
                  seeing.
                  you.
                  coming.
 
Happy now?
Both of you---Jesus and you.
Succeeded in blindsiding me with
           possibilities
               and thoughts, I'd locked away
                  and the flush that swells up in me
                     when you call me "Babe".
 
Now I have to exercise out, the bump of fat
that filled in the spot
where my uterus was
      so I don't
         look a little pregnant  
            with the baby I can't ever give you
               but wish with all my not-so-cynical-anymore,
                   heart,
                     that I could.
 
 
I tried not to love.
Tried real hard.
Failed real hard.
        Fell real hard,
          enough to wash away all the past hurts
              with the tears I should have cried
                 many times
                   to.
                   just.
                  let.
                  the.
                  past.
                  go.
 
I want to wear a pretty dress
whenever the opening credits roll
announcing the future
while we run, laughing on a beach
any beach
      and you'll bring your guitar
         and we'll make up songs as we go
            and my dress will be purple
              to match the veins in my ankles.
 
 It's all your fault
that I fell in love with you.
 
 
    
                
 
 
 
 

I scoop the shattered pieces between my hands.
Little shards sometimes snap and penetrate into the gaps between my fingers as I kneel on the floor.
I've performed the task many times before but it's easy to lose fragments amongst the dirt and debris.
I work carefully, every piece missing is a sliver lost in me.
 Impossible to fix perfectly, but kindness and sunlight, and being alone for some time, it won't be the same design but it should work alright.
I'll still try.

 
There is a nostalgia in her eyes
Like a memory of million heartbeats echoing through time
A story untold through a near glassy glacial glance
Cold and warm all at once
    Reaching out in the night

In the vast expanse there is a sigh
It’s as if there is a secret from the universe wanting to escape
You can almost imagine it as it treks along
Leaving a trail of soft and slow breaths
Leaving stargazers in awe

It becomes kind of like a recollection
Of lovers
      Of friends
Maybe even strangers that crossed paths
Far away in the distance
Of those that left imprints
Amidst stardust
…what could’ve been

There’s a depth in the regard
Another hidden world amidst stars that shine
Amidst an array of galaxies
      and constellations
Pulsing like heartbeats and palpitations
Leaving stargazers in awe
 
If you look up and observe long enough
You’ll be able to see the slight flicker
That tiny sparkle that makes dreamers dream dreams
Like waves that travel near and far
Filling the heart with wonder
     and melancholy

Somewhere up there
In the northern celestial hemisphere
Pisces watches from the vastness of space
Filled with nostalgia
    In eyes that shine
Leaving stargazers…
 

 “Let me confess before I depart this Earth
Without your love I’ll truly hurt,
 “Making my life empty and uncomfortable
Because you’re the missing piece that makes my puzzle whole,

“When our flesh is one for that brief moment
My physical love you erotically own it,
 “Sealed at the waist looking at you face-to-face
Lips not touching as my breath you taste,

 “Your captivating moans are like a Siren’s song
That grip and pulsate all night long,
 “Inch by inch-consuming my giving will
Sending through my body that satisfying chill,

 “Keeping my emotions on a roll-so my psyche don’t unfold
Liquid gold, because unknowingly my soul you have a hold,
 “That endless clutch, across the borders of time
Not even letting go-after me dying,

 “There’s nothing I would not do to keep your love
Sleep on a razor blade rug or let a vampire drain me of blood,
 “Until I’m a dead hollow worthless shell
But I will always break free from the gates of Heaven or Hell,

 “Stabbing my guardian angel through the heart
Fighting Asmodeous and his demon hoard in the pitch dark,
 “Euthanizing all the animals on Noah’s Ark
Setting the Garden of Eden ablaze with a spark,

 “Looking at the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah
Because for your love I’ll overcome the cursed horror,
 “Minor obstacles I would battle through
Just to be eternally with you”.

Since all the world and love is one  
and truth issues from your glib tongue,  
and maiden's wiles your chance improve  
I'll live with you and be your love.  
 
And I shall dance and your words sing
for your delight, each gay morning,
and be your muse though nag you so
you Will outwrite that upstart crow!

But I'd rather have a divan bed
than those roses that you have said,
you forgot the thorns, I suppose,
they'd not do much for our repose...
  
And I'm not sure 'bout those hard rocks  
so pull some wool from your old flock,  
and make with it a seat to sit  
for you and me with sweet comfits.  
   
You need not work on gowns of wool  
for changing clime makes sun not dull,  
and woolen clothes these sceptered isles  
have not been worn for quite a while.  
   
You'll need those buckles made of gold  
to pay the swains, or so I'm told,  
for socialists make wages high  
enough to make the bosses cry.  
   
Those slippers and ivory buds  
kirtle, clasps, belts and amber studs,  
can all be found in cheap shops now  
brought from abroad but God knows how.  
   
And those valleys, groves, hills and fields  
are under concrete roads and sealed,  
thinking on these, I am sore moved...  
to hie me mort to be your love.