The Poverty of Your Reality

Midsummer season on my wintry lips,
these modern symptoms from antiquated sorrows.

The sunlight of acceptance,
the midnight of isolation.

Youthful blushes and the wrinkles of experience,
I have the free will to question my fate.

This wealth of imagination,
and the poverty of my reality.

The warmth of trust in my own creativity,
and the cold of envy I have of normality.

Mr. Brimstone
    "Life everyday swings on everything that blinks and talk
Squat to shit and on legs either crawl or walk,
      "But those who eat ass will eventually catch a parasite
Becoming infected from the shit sandwich they wanted to bite,
 
      "For some its an anticipated taste
Enjoying the disgrace like a golden shower to the face,
      "Because the nasty side of living always has something to preach
On the same bullshit level that religion tries to teach,
 
      "If your hearts good, but you don't go to church-it ain't right
So I guess fuck heavenly light and prepare for hell's eternal night,
      "Religious doctrine twisted by the humanity of man
From the moment of our input we became damned,
 
      "Shit. Many feel confused and neglected from dusk to dawn
By government, religion and the media who drop their own type of atomic bomb,
      "Under the mushroom cloud we unknowingly continue to party
At that moment we need to question-do they give a fuck about anybody?  
 
      "A fuck boy president about to catch an impeach  
Stupid like a black person wanting to be white-so they bathe in bleach,
      "No matter how much you scrub the skin, we're all born of sin
Because motherfuckas, death will never have a friend,
 
      "Not carrying what number we are or our earthly statistic  
Understand, we all will have to gag off his infinite hollow dick,
      "With all our might we can try to spit
Or just swallow the cum of annihilation like a street walking bitch-"
 
CasketSharpe
      "My teeth is darker than the blackest night
That outshine my twisted soul like a blazing light,
      "A feel good moment like when pussy receive my lifegiving cum
Causing me to cuss and the body to go numb,
 
      "Cussing, because it's a connection eighteen years plus
Numb will be my income, because child support doing to much,
      "Truthfully I don't really give a flying fuck
Because mine will be cared for even if baby mama pussy migrate to new nut,
 
      "All this means is that condoms and birth control had to take a leave
While I jackhammered the pussy until it squirt or bleed,
      "At this moment somebody is playing in a pussy playground
Or if gay getting balls deep in the doo-doo brown,
 
      "Personally I can't worry about a person's rhyme or reason
Because every moment of life is considered 'motherfucka season',
      "Look behind the dark comedy curtain at our lost hope
And tell me the worst thing you experienced, was it a fucking joke?
 
      "Rape, murder, death or financial lost
Was flesh, mental instability or your soul the fucking cost?
      "Regardless if you were or were not the cause
Remember from birth to death we all shit the draws".

I do not belong here
poolside with martinis

I did not fit there either
shared bunk beds with my ten year old son a constant fight to keep the roaches at bay

Glancing over shoulder at the times I thought I could squeeze myself in boxes ubiquitous
Only to find myself looking at loose threads and snug buttons
Edges overlapping
Pages stuck together
showing that it just.   that   I just.  did not    was not part

Proof of an otherness
 
As if somehow     this    makes being alone better
Makes the outside
okay


Finding home is never easy

 
within my sullen solemn I am content
stitching time with secrets
woven into my thoughts delusions
things I tell my mind
until they become real

my reality bends with me
I a woman of darkness
silently keening into my faith
on my knees I whisper prayers
demons are my partitioners

beloved beings of honor
singing quietly to me
I keep rhythm with their need
altering my vision until I can see, truth

stringing together stars
a path to illuminate my dark thoughts
a way to navigate the illusion
within my sacred doom I am Queen
turning on the everlasting wheel of the damned

Debris scattered faded wood
My life creeks a bit when windy  
Stones too heavy on the left side  
right side, too dependent
on dreams to be dependable
 It's all too difficult
in black stilletos
I prefer bare feet
 
Peaches crowd out apples
in winter leaving canning jars
half full
Weevils weave their dust through sacks of white rice, I see them
move with each bite.
Used up tea bags stains my walkway with ink blot images
that resemble you

Without, never intended
to create sorrow it was there to build strength
Lack doesn't predict livelihood
Less is always more
Inside these shattered walls  
despair has taken its exit
 
If the well water runs dry  
I shall dig deeper
Corrosion is not destruction
 when too few pennies turn  
a lovely shade of blue.  
This mind falls off  it's many
points of sanity  
Again I will grab hold
of sharp edges  
And make it to the top  
The Poverty of my Reality

 
There we were, enjoying a great family summer day
Kids laughing, splashing, and jumping into the pool
And while swimming back and forth I had an idea
I thought I’d show my kids how I can still be cool

So in my mind I pictured this great Olympic super dive
Starting with tornado twirl like skaters perform on ice
I got out of the pool and called everyone’s attention
What I imagined was going to look epic and really nice

But in reality and what the video proof showed was…
A forty-year-old man doing a slow princess twirl
Arms out like helicopter and stopping for a second
Because he got dizzy, fell into the water yelling like a girl