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Poetry competition CLOSED 2nd December 2018 10:34am
WINNER
Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
RUNNERS-UP:
CasketSharpe
and LunasChild8
Bad Sex
Related submission no longer exists.
Savagery
Enough with the jokes and the riddles,
I’ve been dying to get into your middle now it’s my time to dine,
I’ll make you mine when I play you like a fiddle,
I’ve made you laugh but now you’re about to cry.
You’ll feel this girth
Like you’re about to give birth to the earth
…and henceforth
When I nut up in your butt you’ll strut like a slut,
You may want to rebut but I’ll tell you to shut up
Because this, is my fantasy.
Oh this will be long!
The director’s uncut,
This version is full of perversion, smut and depravity,
With so much viciousness and savagery,
You’ll think it’s a parody.
No it won’t hurt,
By the end you’ll jerk with a smirk
Because with great effort I’ll work and exert till you spurt,
Then I’ll tell you to push and you’ll squirt,
When you get that feeling that you’re out of breath,
It’ll be the little death,
It means you’re about to come,
Don’t worry, no need to call 9-1-1
Wait!
Never mind,
I’m finished,
I am done.
That was only two minutes?
Enough with the jokes and the riddles,
I’ve been dying to get into your middle now it’s my time to dine,
I’ll make you mine when I play you like a fiddle,
I’ve made you laugh but now you’re about to cry.
You’ll feel this girth
Like you’re about to give birth to the earth
…and henceforth
When I nut up in your butt you’ll strut like a slut,
You may want to rebut but I’ll tell you to shut up
Because this, is my fantasy.
Oh this will be long!
The director’s uncut,
This version is full of perversion, smut and depravity,
With so much viciousness and savagery,
You’ll think it’s a parody.
No it won’t hurt,
By the end you’ll jerk with a smirk
Because with great effort I’ll work and exert till you spurt,
Then I’ll tell you to push and you’ll squirt,
When you get that feeling that you’re out of breath,
It’ll be the little death,
It means you’re about to come,
Don’t worry, no need to call 9-1-1
Wait!
Never mind,
I’m finished,
I am done.
That was only two minutes?
INUNDATED
Dear ____________ ,
First, as always
I am flattered
By your invitation.
The sensation of you
On hands, lips and tongue
Is intoxicating.
Drunk, I stagger and flail
To give you what you ask me for-
Trying to swim, I forget how and drown.
Lungs full of water,
Eyes open at the sky
I lie afraid beside your pool of deep, deep love.
Attempting to keep eye contact
As the sky becomes you, too...
I drown anew.
So forgive me, paralyzed as I am,
For not knowing when
Our bodies may entangle again...
...With regard to your accounting question,
Seeing as it is tax season
And I am inundated,
I would prefer
That it wait until
After October 15th.
Thank you for understanding,
Kumar
First, as always
I am flattered
By your invitation.
The sensation of you
On hands, lips and tongue
Is intoxicating.
Drunk, I stagger and flail
To give you what you ask me for-
Trying to swim, I forget how and drown.
Lungs full of water,
Eyes open at the sky
I lie afraid beside your pool of deep, deep love.
Attempting to keep eye contact
As the sky becomes you, too...
I drown anew.
So forgive me, paralyzed as I am,
For not knowing when
Our bodies may entangle again...
...With regard to your accounting question,
Seeing as it is tax season
And I am inundated,
I would prefer
That it wait until
After October 15th.
Thank you for understanding,
Kumar
Written by SatInUGal
(Kumar)
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Bad Sex
( a Quatern )
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
When drinking’s used to pull something funny.
The times when a lover was down and out,
Made sense, no trip to buy booze, no money.
But that makes no sense to bed with a bum.
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
An exB/F’s chum who reeked of cheap rum,
Took all of my change, said I’d do without.
Fellatio was like bones of a trout
From lovers who had no head for hygiene.
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
The mimics who smelled like “O de Latrine”
& men wearing diapers oh God knows when,
The faith shown to me was almost devout.
I’m out of fingers & toes, two times ten,
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count.
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
When drinking’s used to pull something funny.
The times when a lover was down and out,
Made sense, no trip to buy booze, no money.
But that makes no sense to bed with a bum.
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
An exB/F’s chum who reeked of cheap rum,
Took all of my change, said I’d do without.
Fellatio was like bones of a trout
From lovers who had no head for hygiene.
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count
The mimics who smelled like “O de Latrine”
& men wearing diapers oh God knows when,
The faith shown to me was almost devout.
I’m out of fingers & toes, two times ten,
I’ve never had bad sex, unless I count.
Written by Jade-Pandora
(jade tiger)
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Atheists are Lousy Lays
Her axiom was atheism
She proved it in the bedroom
Automated and unimaginative
She conveyed no passion
Afterwards she complained
That I, like all other men
Had failed to give her
A deep meaningful orgasm
I suggested she abandon
Her skeptical nihilism
And make a conversion
To a spiritual perversion
For it is written in the sacred Kama Sutra
"If you ain't got soul
You cannot
Rock & Roll!"
And she'd never be able
To scream in unbridled ecstasy
"Oh Jesus...Jesus...Jesus Christ Almighty!"
Besides, instead of blaming men
For being so bad in bed
I suggested
She might try moving her hips instead
She proved it in the bedroom
Automated and unimaginative
She conveyed no passion
Afterwards she complained
That I, like all other men
Had failed to give her
A deep meaningful orgasm
I suggested she abandon
Her skeptical nihilism
And make a conversion
To a spiritual perversion
For it is written in the sacred Kama Sutra
"If you ain't got soul
You cannot
Rock & Roll!"
And she'd never be able
To scream in unbridled ecstasy
"Oh Jesus...Jesus...Jesus Christ Almighty!"
Besides, instead of blaming men
For being so bad in bed
I suggested
She might try moving her hips instead
Written by snugglebuck
Go To Page
Anonymous
Related submission no longer exists.
Bad Lay
Honeyed words flatter my heart
And I’m genuinely touched by your sincerity
I thought that I could love you back
Yet reality didn’t meet my expectations
The timing was wrong, yet I went along with it anyways
I thought passion would warm my blood eventually
Yet I didn’t feel the spark of desire between my legs
Even with your tongue licking my nectar
You pushed yourself in too early
I wasn’t aroused enough to receive you
Instead of pleasure, I felt discomfort
And disappointment filled me even as you shuddered in pleasure
Still, I let you move, thinking that it’ll set off something within me too
Your kisses didn’t leave a trail of fire on my skin
Bitterness and discomfort were the dominating sensations
I’ve had enough, and I told you to pull out
You were surprised, and I quickly left before I could see more
A shower is in call to wash off the sweat
And I know that I’ll find my release by myself.
And I’m genuinely touched by your sincerity
I thought that I could love you back
Yet reality didn’t meet my expectations
The timing was wrong, yet I went along with it anyways
I thought passion would warm my blood eventually
Yet I didn’t feel the spark of desire between my legs
Even with your tongue licking my nectar
You pushed yourself in too early
I wasn’t aroused enough to receive you
Instead of pleasure, I felt discomfort
And disappointment filled me even as you shuddered in pleasure
Still, I let you move, thinking that it’ll set off something within me too
Your kisses didn’t leave a trail of fire on my skin
Bitterness and discomfort were the dominating sensations
I’ve had enough, and I told you to pull out
You were surprised, and I quickly left before I could see more
A shower is in call to wash off the sweat
And I know that I’ll find my release by myself.
Written by LunasChild8
Go To Page
20 Dollars for a Fuck?
She said:
“I love you long time”
My imaginings sublime
“I love you too much”
There was no way she’d go Dutch
“I loving you sucky, fucky”
I wanted to get down and mucky
She asked me “you parry?”
Like a sexual cash and carry
She said “twenty dolla?”
I had to loosen my collar
She didn’t, but I knew
‘I was not too beaucoup’
I thought ‘for that kinda money
You can keep your risky honey’
I’ll masturbate vigorously to my favorite porn
And order a pepperoni pizza ‘hold the sweet corn’
I would still have enough change left over
To get enough vodka for that earned hangover
That would wash away thoughts of regret
But you pays your money and get what you get
An orgasm, a pizza, and lots of vodka tonic
And the use of sexual toys, stimulation electronic
And all for twenty bucks
So I don’t give twenty fucks
About the hooker on offer
I’d rather do the other
More to enjoy, more of a bargain
And I don’t have to listen to Vietnamese jargon
She walked away angry I wouldn’t employ
“You are queer man, you are ladyboy”
Her ass wiggle in the wank bank
I’m going home to give it a yank
Free from worries about my sexual health
I’ll get what I need and party by myself
“I love you long time”
My imaginings sublime
“I love you too much”
There was no way she’d go Dutch
“I loving you sucky, fucky”
I wanted to get down and mucky
She asked me “you parry?”
Like a sexual cash and carry
She said “twenty dolla?”
I had to loosen my collar
She didn’t, but I knew
‘I was not too beaucoup’
I thought ‘for that kinda money
You can keep your risky honey’
I’ll masturbate vigorously to my favorite porn
And order a pepperoni pizza ‘hold the sweet corn’
I would still have enough change left over
To get enough vodka for that earned hangover
That would wash away thoughts of regret
But you pays your money and get what you get
An orgasm, a pizza, and lots of vodka tonic
And the use of sexual toys, stimulation electronic
And all for twenty bucks
So I don’t give twenty fucks
About the hooker on offer
I’d rather do the other
More to enjoy, more of a bargain
And I don’t have to listen to Vietnamese jargon
She walked away angry I wouldn’t employ
“You are queer man, you are ladyboy”
Her ass wiggle in the wank bank
I’m going home to give it a yank
Free from worries about my sexual health
I’ll get what I need and party by myself
Written by David_Macleod
(14397816)
Go To Page
Jalapeño Hot Sex
I should have left him that night. It had begun decent enough. He'd cooked for me. Spicy goodness that shows a man knows his way around a kitchen.
Tummies full, he started his half-assed attempts to satisfy me in other ways. He was always rushing for the prize, no patience for warm-ups with that one.
As his fingers entered me, I realized something was very, very wrong. I was burning from the inside out. Not the kind of burn I would know with other men. Nope--the kind that sends you racing to the shower, then to the fridge to douse your girl bits in yogurt in an attempt to avoid imminent death.
All the while, he lay there, nonplussed and partially amused, falling asleep before I even returned to bed. Yep--I should have walked away right then and there, ice pack between my legs, nursing all assortments of parts in ways he never would.
R.
Tummies full, he started his half-assed attempts to satisfy me in other ways. He was always rushing for the prize, no patience for warm-ups with that one.
As his fingers entered me, I realized something was very, very wrong. I was burning from the inside out. Not the kind of burn I would know with other men. Nope--the kind that sends you racing to the shower, then to the fridge to douse your girl bits in yogurt in an attempt to avoid imminent death.
All the while, he lay there, nonplussed and partially amused, falling asleep before I even returned to bed. Yep--I should have walked away right then and there, ice pack between my legs, nursing all assortments of parts in ways he never would.
R.
Written by Rachelleundrgrd
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Velvet’s Viagra
* For the ‘Bad Sex’ Competition *
He sidles up beside me
on the street
I hide my repulsion for
the old creep
I’m a dealer, out to make
a few bucks
Have what he needs for his
solitary fucks
He slips me the notes, I count
out the cash
I got the pervert’s sildenafil stash
Deal done he’s off on his
lecherous way
Just hope he doesn’t
overdose today.
He sidles up beside me
on the street
I hide my repulsion for
the old creep
I’m a dealer, out to make
a few bucks
Have what he needs for his
solitary fucks
He slips me the notes, I count
out the cash
I got the pervert’s sildenafil stash
Deal done he’s off on his
lecherous way
Just hope he doesn’t
overdose today.
Written by Velvet
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