Poems About Water Seeking Honest Critique
#water
Poems about water seeking honest critique. Honest feedback has been requested for these poems.
Fluidity
Dawn, rests on grass blades, unbending
My dry dying bones lap up her gift
Mystical rise to skies, ascending
Carried by air, barely, thick on my breath
My atrocities below, leak to above
She withdraws her warmth but keeps her cool
Falling gems, she weeps from bitter love
In her wrath, I'm hailed with ice daggers
Calling me into depths of her magnetic ocean
Resting my head softly into her dark depths
Cities and their kings fall to her liquid emotion
In you, I give final breath, because I love
My dry dying bones lap up her gift
Mystical rise to skies, ascending
Carried by air, barely, thick on my breath
My atrocities below, leak to above
She withdraws her warmth but keeps her cool
Falling gems, she weeps from bitter love
In her wrath, I'm hailed with ice daggers
Calling me into depths of her magnetic ocean
Resting my head softly into her dark depths
Cities and their kings fall to her liquid emotion
In you, I give final breath, because I love
#love
#NaPoWriMo2024
#water
141 reads
1 Comment
Great Day For A Cool Swim
Preston and some friends arrived at the beach house
just in time to see Juliette swimming around
in a black bikini before she heard a
voice say "Great day for a cool swim, Darling Sweetheart!"
just in time to see Juliette swimming around
in a black bikini before she heard a
voice say "Great day for a cool swim, Darling Sweetheart!"
#beach
#fiction
#friendship
#summer
#water
170 reads
0 Comments
Monoliths
Wintry tears drip deep,
into icy, dark waters
The stream is endless,
as she came to me in the form of paradise
As I envisioned
I made a decision
Wisdom floats
as infinity awaits
into icy, dark waters
The stream is endless,
as she came to me in the form of paradise
As I envisioned
I made a decision
Wisdom floats
as infinity awaits
#utopia
#winter
#water
#nature
#wisdom
173 reads
2 Comments
One fish, Two Fish - NaPoWriMo 10
Inside me are
one fish, two fish
at the least,
The dreamiest goldfish
daydreaming away
into obliviousness
you have ever known
so out of touch
they forget the previous moment
in favour of naive fondness
eager to look on the positive
and the golden lining.
And a surprise Shark
snarling and snapping away
in sudden savage attack
with a grinning quip
of deepest blue
to flush blood into the water
and a sharp erect fin
that will hardly finish anytime soon,
slapping some colour into...
one fish, two fish
at the least,
The dreamiest goldfish
daydreaming away
into obliviousness
you have ever known
so out of touch
they forget the previous moment
in favour of naive fondness
eager to look on the positive
and the golden lining.
And a surprise Shark
snarling and snapping away
in sudden savage attack
with a grinning quip
of deepest blue
to flush blood into the water
and a sharp erect fin
that will hardly finish anytime soon,
slapping some colour into...
#identity
#water
#fish
#SelfReflection
#NaPoWriMo2024
170 reads
1 Comment
Well? Don't You Want To Join Me For A Hot Soak?
Khloe looked at
Jason standing
naked next to
the jacuzzi.
Jason standing
naked next to
the jacuzzi.
#friendship
#water
#fiction
#FreeVerse
#sensual
196 reads
0 Comments
Dragon ships
Snails
full sail
wet pavement
drums
full sail
wet pavement
drums
#rain
#water
204 reads
2 Comments
Hymn to Water
They were windsurfing on the lake today.
Storm Kathleen was rolling in after all
and so I watched them on a jetty
skim the waves with all the grace
of Bambi on ice.
The sports club owns that one—
charges exorbitant fees to dive
as well as insisting on wet-suits
and tow-floats and lifeguards
and other shit sucking the life
from wild experiences.
I don’t swim there.
I refuse to be sanitised
and maybe as forty looms
I carry with me the spirit
of my anarchic era
...
Storm Kathleen was rolling in after all
and so I watched them on a jetty
skim the waves with all the grace
of Bambi on ice.
The sports club owns that one—
charges exorbitant fees to dive
as well as insisting on wet-suits
and tow-floats and lifeguards
and other shit sucking the life
from wild experiences.
I don’t swim there.
I refuse to be sanitised
and maybe as forty looms
I carry with me the spirit
of my anarchic era
...
#water
#nature
#pagan #Britain
#pagan #Britain
194 reads
8 Comments
Embracing The Aquatic - Heat 3
If we pay to use
the neighborhood pool,
you will join the swim team.”
A parental edict
we thought was real mean.
Getting up early
on Summer-break day's
Mounting old, purple
Schwinn bicycle,
slowly, reluctantly peddling…
sloth off to practice
for a Saturday meet
Beach towel, goggles
dangling ‘roun neck.
Wearing too brief,
light/darker blue-striped Speedo.
Splashers’ mandated
racing suit…
that if worn today,
would get me arrested.
Greeted each day
by smiley Coach Butch...
the neighborhood pool,
you will join the swim team.”
A parental edict
we thought was real mean.
Getting up early
on Summer-break day's
Mounting old, purple
Schwinn bicycle,
slowly, reluctantly peddling…
sloth off to practice
for a Saturday meet
Beach towel, goggles
dangling ‘roun neck.
Wearing too brief,
light/darker blue-striped Speedo.
Splashers’ mandated
racing suit…
that if worn today,
would get me arrested.
Greeted each day
by smiley Coach Butch...
#childhood
#water
#memorial #sports
#memorial #sports
172 reads
0 Comments
Embracing The Aquatic, Heat 1
Doctor says,
“stop sitting idle watching the telly
start emptying that bowl full of jelly.”
Next, prescribing an exercise regime.
“Water walking is easy on the joints”
Dear, healer of highest esteem
you taunt me on purpose
I am good but by no means perfect
Oh, on the floor of a shallow pool
not striding on the surface?
I’ll do as you suggest.
A wonderful dichotomous effect,
losing weight while keeping cool.
“stop sitting idle watching the telly
start emptying that bowl full of jelly.”
Next, prescribing an exercise regime.
“Water walking is easy on the joints”
Dear, healer of highest esteem
you taunt me on purpose
I am good but by no means perfect
Oh, on the floor of a shallow pool
not striding on the surface?
I’ll do as you suggest.
A wonderful dichotomous effect,
losing weight while keeping cool.
#happiness
#love
#water
#SelfReflection
#SelfDiscovery
133 reads
0 Comments
Sails the Lonely Ship
From a land I was exiled
I sail on,
Forevermore
Who will guide me now?
The sun never rises
Beyond the stars,
Unknown
Ploughing through angry waves
cold winds blow
ice forming on the mast
Desperate
Memories of loved ones fading away
Children grow & die
Who will remember or accept me
Discarded
Waiting to die.
I sail on,
Forevermore
Who will guide me now?
The sun never rises
Beyond the stars,
Unknown
Ploughing through angry waves
cold winds blow
ice forming on the mast
Desperate
Memories of loved ones fading away
Children grow & die
Who will remember or accept me
Discarded
Waiting to die.
#sadness
#loneliness
#sea
#water
#nature
232 reads
8 Comments
Sunning By The Pool Before She Saw Her Former Lover
Xena
was sunning
herself
by the pool before
she saw her former
lover Brian with
that one
skanky bitch
Layla.
was sunning
herself
by the pool before
she saw her former
lover Brian with
that one
skanky bitch
Layla.
#heartbroken
#summer
#water
#fiction
#lover
163 reads
0 Comments
Nocturnal Tranquility...
Tucked within the Blue Ridge tapestry,
I watched, with passion, as skies of sun
and indigo kissed day goodbye.
Droplets of dew fell from the ether
to then be carried upon a chaotic zephyr
while I bundled around the fire.
As hues of muted grey painted the sky,
the moon made its debut in a pale,
yet supple form; granting the slightest mångata atop the liquid mirth.
As the cosmos embraced the lake from
the expanse of its astral plane,
I played voyeur; wrapped up in their moonlight reverie, and thoroughly
enjoying the cold, yet...
I watched, with passion, as skies of sun
and indigo kissed day goodbye.
Droplets of dew fell from the ether
to then be carried upon a chaotic zephyr
while I bundled around the fire.
As hues of muted grey painted the sky,
the moon made its debut in a pale,
yet supple form; granting the slightest mångata atop the liquid mirth.
As the cosmos embraced the lake from
the expanse of its astral plane,
I played voyeur; wrapped up in their moonlight reverie, and thoroughly
enjoying the cold, yet...
#night
#water
#mountains
#moon
#peace
451 reads
28 Comments
DU Poetry : Poems About Water Seeking Honest Critique