Least Read Satirical Poems
#satirical
Cyndi_Moone
Poem Published
8th Sep 2017 5:40pm
8th Sep 2017 5:40pm
VOTO DE BODA
Estoy en carro prestado
Porque el tren ya me habia dejado
Muchos fueron los años
Que solo encontraba engaños
Hasta que un galán secuestro mi corazón
Y para casarme, me ha dado buena razón.
Pasaré los dias junto a él
Y por siempre le sere muy fiel.
En los tiempos Buenos y los tiempos malos
Depende si le hago la comida o se mete en chaos.
Doesn't "ring" well in English and, therefore, the humor is lost....but this is the translation:
I am in a borrowed car
Because the train had already passed me by
Many...
Porque el tren ya me habia dejado
Muchos fueron los años
Que solo encontraba engaños
Hasta que un galán secuestro mi corazón
Y para casarme, me ha dado buena razón.
Pasaré los dias junto a él
Y por siempre le sere muy fiel.
En los tiempos Buenos y los tiempos malos
Depende si le hago la comida o se mete en chaos.
Doesn't "ring" well in English and, therefore, the humor is lost....but this is the translation:
I am in a borrowed car
Because the train had already passed me by
Many...
#relationships
#parody
#satirical
#funny
#metaphor
12 reads
4 Comments
Thor_Azine
Poem Published
23rd May 2024 12:24pm
23rd May 2024 12:24pm
I Hate Days that End in "Y"
It was a junk punch,
sleight of hand, dodgeball
to the face type of morning
that screamed "fuck you"
with a breath so hot
it wilted the garden flowers
Then I got out of bed
sleight of hand, dodgeball
to the face type of morning
that screamed "fuck you"
with a breath so hot
it wilted the garden flowers
Then I got out of bed
#anger
#frustration
#satirical
16 reads
5 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
10th Nov 2024 10:56pm
10th Nov 2024 10:56pm
Runaways
I visited lost property
Firstly at the police station
But to no avail
Then lost luggage
At British Rail
Then a call out on social media
After first reading an encyclopedia
Yet no matter what
No answers were got
I'd searched far, and wide
Where on earth could it hide?
As i slowly lose my mind
It's my sense of humour i can't find
And i suspect i know
That my humour
Ran away with my mojo!
by Jemia
Firstly at the police station
But to no avail
Then lost luggage
At British Rail
Then a call out on social media
After first reading an encyclopedia
Yet no matter what
No answers were got
I'd searched far, and wide
Where on earth could it hide?
As i slowly lose my mind
It's my sense of humour i can't find
And i suspect i know
That my humour
Ran away with my mojo!
by Jemia
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#satirical #SelfDiscovery
#satirical #SelfDiscovery
16 reads
0 Comments
yelluw_always
Poem Published
9th Jan 2019 6:47am
9th Jan 2019 6:47am
we are PPM
in the age of the broke
a future of invisible people
this week, a body-part’s for an exhibit
previously, another’s placed in a concrete mix
and we will fit daresay behind
furniture that is never flush to the wall
during the age of the penniless
the eyebrow, a nape, and both achilles to be the norm
sold, the entirety of doors will be locked
because deemed unnecessary by a many shedding face
we will slide
in and out of the mail slots to be called
Feel that Draft?
the small of the back for the...
a future of invisible people
this week, a body-part’s for an exhibit
previously, another’s placed in a concrete mix
and we will fit daresay behind
furniture that is never flush to the wall
during the age of the penniless
the eyebrow, a nape, and both achilles to be the norm
sold, the entirety of doors will be locked
because deemed unnecessary by a many shedding face
we will slide
in and out of the mail slots to be called
Feel that Draft?
the small of the back for the...
#money
#satirical
#consumerism
20 reads
4 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
31st Oct 2024 00:12am
31st Oct 2024 00:12am
No(n)sense?
I sensed an ounce of sense
It cost me fifty pence
Not to be senseless
But this sense was nonsense
So still no sense
And now ive lost my fifty pence
Which is far better
Than losing fifty pens
And have nothing to write with
But still make no sense!
by Jemia
It cost me fifty pence
Not to be senseless
But this sense was nonsense
So still no sense
And now ive lost my fifty pence
Which is far better
Than losing fifty pens
And have nothing to write with
But still make no sense!
by Jemia
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#satirical
23 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
2nd Nov 2024 00:34am
2nd Nov 2024 00:34am
Talking Pigeon
I went to see my doctor
she said "how are your stools?"
"Very comfy thanks!"
"Although, one has a strange colour
in the padding"
She looked at me aghast, and appalled
I
Still misinterpretting her meaning
And puzzled at her reaction
Said
"I also have a three legged one for milking
not that i use it , as i don't have a cow!"
She asked me what on earth i was talking about
As she had never heard of a three legged cow
I said "no no no no no!"
"It's my stools with the...
she said "how are your stools?"
"Very comfy thanks!"
"Although, one has a strange colour
in the padding"
She looked at me aghast, and appalled
I
Still misinterpretting her meaning
And puzzled at her reaction
Said
"I also have a three legged one for milking
not that i use it , as i don't have a cow!"
She asked me what on earth i was talking about
As she had never heard of a three legged cow
I said "no no no no no!"
"It's my stools with the...
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#satirical #surreal
#satirical #surreal
24 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
17th Sep 2024 11:03pm
17th Sep 2024 11:03pm
A Dyers Diary Of His Dire Rear!
A Dyers Diary Of His Dire Rear!
And the dyers ear
In a dire diary
Things got pretty dire for the dyer
Because of his dire rear
But nothing he heard
Because of his dyers dire ear!
by Jemia
And the dyers ear
In a dire diary
Things got pretty dire for the dyer
Because of his dire rear
But nothing he heard
Because of his dyers dire ear!
by Jemia
#funny
#LifeStruggles
#satirical
28 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
5th Sep 2024 2:15am
5th Sep 2024 2:15am
Foot Loose
I sat with one of my legs
Hanging over the side of the bed
Daydreaming (it was 3:30am
So i suppose i should call it night dreaming
Whilst wide awake!)
Letting my imagination run away with me (like we were eloping!)
When i imagined an arm coming out
From under my bed
And grabbing me by the ankle!
Needless to say
I quickly lifted my leg onto the bed
Which made me feelb quite silly
So out of bravado, and retalliation to my fears
And that it was complete nonsense to have such fears
I decided to hang both mylegs over the side...
Hanging over the side of the bed
Daydreaming (it was 3:30am
So i suppose i should call it night dreaming
Whilst wide awake!)
Letting my imagination run away with me (like we were eloping!)
When i imagined an arm coming out
From under my bed
And grabbing me by the ankle!
Needless to say
I quickly lifted my leg onto the bed
Which made me feelb quite silly
So out of bravado, and retalliation to my fears
And that it was complete nonsense to have such fears
I decided to hang both mylegs over the side...
#fear
#funny
#LifeAsAWriter
#monsters
#satirical
29 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
9th Sep 2024 10:28pm
9th Sep 2024 10:28pm
Sixty Score Codsprats!
All sounds fishy to me
So i sailed the seven seas
Which had all turned to sand
Making it much easier to find land
And no concerns about sinking
Which set me to thinking
I was to introduce a selkie into this tale
Wondering if she had codsprats for sale
A hundred dozen, or sixty score
Don't think i'd want any more
Sixty score codsprats
1200 Postcards (at)
by Jemia
So i sailed the seven seas
Which had all turned to sand
Making it much easier to find land
And no concerns about sinking
Which set me to thinking
I was to introduce a selkie into this tale
Wondering if she had codsprats for sale
A hundred dozen, or sixty score
Don't think i'd want any more
Sixty score codsprats
1200 Postcards (at)
by Jemia
#funny
#parody
#satirical
29 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
21st Sep 2024 11:15pm
21st Sep 2024 11:15pm
Mirror, Or Mirage?
I discovered a portal, in my flat
And didn't quite know, what to make of that
So i clambered through it, to another dimension
I had no clothes on, thought it best to mention
It was warm, and balmy, and quite weird
Especially when my Doppelganger appeared
She slowly approached me, and said "nice tits!"
I appreciated the compliment, but worried about all other bits
Did my bum look big in this, or was i knobbly kneed
My hair was a mess, i have to concede
Well we got talking, and remembering similar things
Of things that went pong,...
And didn't quite know, what to make of that
So i clambered through it, to another dimension
I had no clothes on, thought it best to mention
It was warm, and balmy, and quite weird
Especially when my Doppelganger appeared
She slowly approached me, and said "nice tits!"
I appreciated the compliment, but worried about all other bits
Did my bum look big in this, or was i knobbly kneed
My hair was a mess, i have to concede
Well we got talking, and remembering similar things
Of things that went pong,...
#mirror
#satirical
#SelfDiscovery #SelfReflection
#SelfDiscovery #SelfReflection
29 reads
0 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
10th Sep 2024 1:40am
10th Sep 2024 1:40am
Dots Dash For Morse
Dot dashed
She loved Morse
But thought it wouldn't last
As Morse dashed away
But Morse
Was secretly dotty, about Dot
Dot dashed to Morse
As she found him quite dashing
They later married!
And became a circus act
The dashing Morse
Would stand on Dots head
So together
They became an exclamation
They had no offspring
As they were incapable of such things
Resulting in Dot dashing off
With a question mark
She liked her curves...___...?
by Jemia?
She loved Morse
But thought it wouldn't last
As Morse dashed away
But Morse
Was secretly dotty, about Dot
Dot dashed to Morse
As she found him quite dashing
They later married!
And became a circus act
The dashing Morse
Would stand on Dots head
So together
They became an exclamation
They had no offspring
As they were incapable of such things
Resulting in Dot dashing off
With a question mark
She liked her curves...___...?
by Jemia?
#funny
#satirical
31 reads
1 Comment
missjem56
Poem Published
17th Sep 2024 00:53am
17th Sep 2024 00:53am
A Blue Kind Of Day!
I was verbally abused today
A person
Said an unforgivable thing to me
I find it almost to difficult to repeat
I'm still in shock!
What a thing
To accuse a complete stranger of
ME!!!!!
A TORY!!!!!!
I shall never wear blue ever again
Nor red
Nor yellow
Nor green
Which basically
Leaves me with nothing
So i'll be naked
In the lily the pink
Although it's a bit cold
So i'll likely turn blue
Then indubitally
I'll be accused
Of being a Tory again!
How very liberally laborious!
by...
A person
Said an unforgivable thing to me
I find it almost to difficult to repeat
I'm still in shock!
What a thing
To accuse a complete stranger of
ME!!!!!
A TORY!!!!!!
I shall never wear blue ever again
Nor red
Nor yellow
Nor green
Which basically
Leaves me with nothing
So i'll be naked
In the lily the pink
Although it's a bit cold
So i'll likely turn blue
Then indubitally
I'll be accused
Of being a Tory again!
How very liberally laborious!
by...
#funny
#politics
#satirical
32 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Least Read Satirical Poems
