deepundergroundpoetry.com
No no
Keeping it together
With a smile on my face
It's a cruel world
I take my chances just to fall down
no, no, no
I
sit
down
Never find "ME"
laid out on the floor
I'm a solider
Fighting every second of everyday
To sip pink champaign
With no one to toast
Still
all in, I'm chillin
No tears
No hope
No wings to fly
Always a new hand to hold!
Published 5th Aug 2012
| Edited 6th Aug 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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5th Aug 2012 1:52pm
5th Aug 2012 3:03pm
6th Aug 2012 00:14am
Gigi.
good stuff. I'd probably change the structure just a little to get the full impact of some of the lines:
Keeping it together
With a smile on my face
It's a cruel world
I take my chances just to fall down
no, no, no
I
sit
down
Never find "ME"
laid out on the floor
I'm a solider
Fighting every second of everyday
To sip pink champaign
With no one to toast
Still
all in, I'm chillin
No tears
No hope
No wings to fly
Always a new hand to hold!
obviously just a suggestion.
anyhow, power to you !
good stuff. I'd probably change the structure just a little to get the full impact of some of the lines:
Keeping it together
With a smile on my face
It's a cruel world
I take my chances just to fall down
no, no, no
I
sit
down
Never find "ME"
laid out on the floor
I'm a solider
Fighting every second of everyday
To sip pink champaign
With no one to toast
Still
all in, I'm chillin
No tears
No hope
No wings to fly
Always a new hand to hold!
obviously just a suggestion.
anyhow, power to you !
6th Aug 2012 1:50am
6th Aug 2012 5:39am
my beautiful Gg always from the heart and soul..I love the piece of you..xoxoxoxo peace Crim :)
6th Aug 2012 5:51am
Anonymous
- Edited 11th Jun 2018 12:45pm
6th Aug 2012 10:50am
<< post removed >>
6th Aug 2012 4:55pm
6th Aug 2012 5:33pm
6th Aug 2012 5:45pm
