Crying During Crazy on You

There are a bunch of songs by Heart
I don't particularly like

How Can I Get You Alone
sounds like a bank commercial
The Dog and the Butterfly
is dopey and boring
Alone
is too repetitive for me

But the Heart songs I like...
Well, I really heart those Heart songs
I'm mad for Magic Man,
and crazy for Crazy on You

Our seats are super steep
in the basketball arena
Our backs are literally against the wall
in the very last row.
Looking down
makes me quietly queasy.

And it's a work night
I know that 5 AM 
is going to come hard and fast
And my job is hard enough
even when I'm not exhausted

And I still cry for my dead cat every night
and my country's democracy is crumbling
and I have to figure out where I'm going to move
and what I'm going to do
and why won't this cold go away
and...

Just so many fucking ands.

The opening band, Squeeze
brightens my mood
with the wistful elegance of their old songs
Still, my mind wanders at times
to nothing good.

When Heart hits the stage
Ann Wilson in a wheelchair
(a painful injury the week before)
I'm still not as present as I'd like to be
Though once the music and visual effects start,
they elbow my stupid mind aside
and demand moments of pure joy.

A few more songs
Bowie's Let's Dance
Cool!
These Dreams
Nice.
Even How Can I Get You Alone
is better than I thought.

So, it's good
Not too many ands
I'm reasonably happy.

And then the lights dim further
and the frenetic intro to Crazy on You begins.

Itt is so powerful
and jarring
and loud
and beautiful

It is actually enough.

Not enough in daily life
is enough for me.
I crave intensity
and this song...
this song is like a dream lover
sweeping me up in his strong arms
with the unwavering promise
of dominating me to bliss.

The song and lights
are so immersive
I am fully present
yet also in my youth
for which this song was a soundtrack.

Mid song,
 my face is wet with happy tears
and it feels like there are good times ahead for me
and I get to go to Las Vegas next week
and I'm going to foster a cat 
maybe even two
and I love the poetry class I just started
and...

so many good ands

And they haven't even played Magic Man yet.