familial souvenirs for a past life

I want to shred your face
with my fingernails

I want you to hug me
and tell me you've always
loved me
and let all perceived sins
be forgiven

I want to forgive you
let the past float
into an ocean of new
where this blood
doesn't haunt us anymore

I want to take this pain
and shove it through your chest
and pretend like you feel
... something

I want you
to feel something
for me
that isn't blind animosity
and generational violence

I want there to be love
where there is no love
but I know there isn't enough
magic in the universe
to make you love me

I want to shred your face
with my fingernails
and watch you stitch yourself
into...

I want to shred your face
with my fingernails
because maybe this time...

I want to shred your face
with...

I just want you to love me