TWISTED       (11:30pm, 6-16-2020, Palm Springs, California)

 
with every little
twisted fence
or hateful
fear based wall
you build or raise
you burn
a thousand
unseen bridges
to greater peace
to more compassionate understanding
to more empathetic love
and to deeper
universal
more meaningful
healing connection
in this increasingly divisive
near completely disconnected world
so wtf is that
no need to speak to me
nor anyone else
in such egoic vain
hurtfully hostile defense
when in fact
it s lame for me to think
that you could ever even
begin to learn
to selflessly think or feel
much less how
to ever truly love
me or anyone else
nor ever change at all
at this point in your life s
now too long congealed
subconsciously wounded
self centered journey
yet despite all that
and our own
much too long shared
much too toxic
jekyll hyde
good and bad
but still nonetheless
mostly nightmarish
life lesson filled
four and a half years
deceptively entrapped
abusively toxic
falsely shared journey together
it s truly a miracle
that i m still here
and alive
and even though here now
almost six years later
we currently both are
and somehow
at least
presently still remain
amicable friends
co familiar survivors
still it s some small comfort
to me now
in my simply
yet more  clearly knowing
that you can never
counter  nor match
my much keener
awakened perception s
more innately acute
multi dimensional intuitive awareness
without all the
diabolically dark
indeed  often at times
truly sinisterly evil
hair triggered  
suddenly volatile
walking on eggshells
explosively traumatic
mine field terrains
injuriously destructive
self blinded
visionless mismeasurements
heartless  merciless
psychotically abusive
always so unexpected  
recurrent episodes
of your more linear
egoic left brain mind s
combined with the implosive catalyst
of your more deeply suppressed
subconscious mind s
pathologically sociopathic
unconscionably intentional assaults
instantly triggered
dark shadow  lifetime wounds
unleashed and released
from your now long forgotten
long buried
experiential past
that you can no longer
for i will no longer let you
get away with suddenly throwing
any more of your old
more linear  egoic mind s
left brain s self blinded
visionless mismeasurements
completely heartless  soulless
fucking narcisistically abusive
unconscionably toxic
hurtful bull shit
on me
never  ever
again
for i will
let go completely
of all and any more
hope
and instantly retract
both my still current state
of presently ongoing
forgiveness
while still yet
forever forgiving you
but no longer
ever forgetting again
or allowing and giving you
any further opportunity
nor chance
for the true unchanging nature
of your innately pathological
personality s immutable  
completely irredeemable
behavioral nature s
psychologically
inescapable
potentially recurrent
ongoing
behavioral
past
to ever reach
touch
impact  effect
harm  hurt
befall
nor infect me
never
ever  
again