Blow out the Candles

You ever attend a friend’s child’s birthday party
Having wrapped nothing but an empty box
And located the little slugger’s birthday cake
So that when no one was looking
You could place your penis gently on the cake
Letting it sit there for no less than 35 seconds
1 mississippi, 2 Mississippi...
Afterwards lifting your icing covered cock off the cake
Putting it back in your pants
Not even bothering to wipe that shit off your dick
And wait around to sing happy birthday?
No?
Yeah... me either