Submissions by Jermainesplain
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction I am Jermaine Isaiah Duncan from Bowie. Poetry is my blood
Jermaine Should Be A Household Name
I watched the television at high noon
Laughed and made mean gestures as that uncouth, Orange buffoon boarded a helicopter and knew that soon WE the people would come together, brave the steel winter’s unforgiving weather, and welcome adults back into the room. YES! We would watch, teary eyed as the racist underbelly of this country, crawling back to hide beneath the rocks and stones, left a country to atone, for this stolen land. America, raise your crimson hands and know you’re not alone. When suddenly... who should step up to the podium, to speak the truth from their heart? An upstart....
Laughed and made mean gestures as that uncouth, Orange buffoon boarded a helicopter and knew that soon WE the people would come together, brave the steel winter’s unforgiving weather, and welcome adults back into the room. YES! We would watch, teary eyed as the racist underbelly of this country, crawling back to hide beneath the rocks and stones, left a country to atone, for this stolen land. America, raise your crimson hands and know you’re not alone. When suddenly... who should step up to the podium, to speak the truth from their heart? An upstart....
#love
#hope
#America #racism
#America #racism
32 reads
0 Comments
A Christmas Miracle
I cannot keep these hoes away
They hunger for my dick
But once a year on Christmas Day
My life becomes a hallmark flick
Bust a nutcrackers line my shelves
I don my Santa hat
I cook some cookies shaped like Elves
And hand them out at the laundromat
I share cocaine with all the kids
Who come from broken homes
And sleep well knowing what I did
Baby Jesus will condone
Merry Christmas to all my bitches
They hunger for my dick
But once a year on Christmas Day
My life becomes a hallmark flick
Bust a nutcrackers line my shelves
I don my Santa hat
I cook some cookies shaped like Elves
And hand them out at the laundromat
I share cocaine with all the kids
Who come from broken homes
And sleep well knowing what I did
Baby Jesus will condone
Merry Christmas to all my bitches
#hope
#Christmas
#uplifting
60 reads
0 Comments
Hey Ghosts, No Soliciting On Xmas
Last Christmas Eve, this bitch I used to fuck with (who died from a Fentanyl overdose)... she come walking into my house. She was wearing chains and shit and looking pretty fuckin’ hot for a ghost. She tells me I’m gonna be visited by three ghosts and I’m thinking to myself, this some straight Dickensian shit right here. I ask her where she got them chains and she starts telling me but my mind goes wandering to her hard ass nipples and I’m wondering how ghosts even get cold if they dead, so I don’t really hear whatever the fuck she was trying to say to me. But anyhow, the first ghost was the...
#courage
#inspirational
#Christmas #ghosts
#Christmas #ghosts
73 reads
2 Comments
Check Out The Mamories On That One
I’d like the lather up those milk factories and give her a well buttered bruskie... lemme tell yah
What’s the cup size of those glorious meat hills, anyways?
How’s bouts you silicon shimmy on over her and lemme slap them baps with this here sausage staff?
Every time I see a nice pair of porncakes it takes me back in time
When I was a wee pup in my mother’s buffet line
Formula is for incels, that’s how it went
And even infant Jermaine pitched an impressive tent
For mommy
Ah... mommy
Let’s face the facts
This is why folks...
What’s the cup size of those glorious meat hills, anyways?
How’s bouts you silicon shimmy on over her and lemme slap them baps with this here sausage staff?
Every time I see a nice pair of porncakes it takes me back in time
When I was a wee pup in my mother’s buffet line
Formula is for incels, that’s how it went
And even infant Jermaine pitched an impressive tent
For mommy
Ah... mommy
Let’s face the facts
This is why folks...
#love
#women
#gratitude
#feminism
#admiration
108 reads
0 Comments
Jermaine For President
Jermaine For President
2020
2020
#hope
#courage
#America
#admiration
#heroic
93 reads
0 Comments
Hey Austin, I f**ked Your Girl Candice

#lust
#sex
#erotic
#lies
#sensual
186 reads
4 Comments
Yelp Review
Last time I went out for a meal
It cost more than the tab
Diarrhea on the docket
And skid marks in the cab
I was up all night hunched over
Heaving out all that was left
What a way to spend an evening
My compliments to the chef
Cold sweats inside my bedroom
And fevered toilet dreams
I never should have followed fish
With chocolate chip ice cream
An entire pint of bourbon
Was a mistake I must confess
Lord, just get me to tomorrow
My compliments to the chef
Twitching at the...
It cost more than the tab
Diarrhea on the docket
And skid marks in the cab
I was up all night hunched over
Heaving out all that was left
What a way to spend an evening
My compliments to the chef
Cold sweats inside my bedroom
And fevered toilet dreams
I never should have followed fish
With chocolate chip ice cream
An entire pint of bourbon
Was a mistake I must confess
Lord, just get me to tomorrow
My compliments to the chef
Twitching at the...
#strength
#courage
#food
#illness
#determination
127 reads
4 Comments
Rape Sells Volume 2
Take heed, young poet- and hear me now
What the people want is not high brow
I’ve declared myself the gutter king
Smut sovereign over everything
And it’s blumkins before wedding bells
In this twisted game of show and tell
Tasteful limericks are not allowed
Hoist the flag and take the vow
Go ask Ghislaine Maxwell
She’ll tell you plainly that rape sells
What the people want is not high brow
I’ve declared myself the gutter king
Smut sovereign over everything
And it’s blumkins before wedding bells
In this twisted game of show and tell
Tasteful limericks are not allowed
Hoist the flag and take the vow
Go ask Ghislaine Maxwell
She’ll tell you plainly that rape sells
#courage
#admiration
#respect
#heroic
#determination
135 reads
1 Comment
Ode To The Greatest Movie Ever Made
Waterworld had a huge impact
It helped me get my life on track
Every morning I drink piss
You can thank Kevin Costner for this
A salty way
To start the day
Chugging urine from a thermos
You can thank Kevin Costner for this
And I tried to do just that
I tweeted “thanks” but he didn’t tweet back
What’s so hard to understand
Some sailors never reach Dry Land
Another thing I like to do
Is give little girls back tattoos
And wage wars in hot air balloons
And fuck random women in lagoons
I also...
It helped me get my life on track
Every morning I drink piss
You can thank Kevin Costner for this
A salty way
To start the day
Chugging urine from a thermos
You can thank Kevin Costner for this
And I tried to do just that
I tweeted “thanks” but he didn’t tweet back
What’s so hard to understand
Some sailors never reach Dry Land
Another thing I like to do
Is give little girls back tattoos
And wage wars in hot air balloons
And fuck random women in lagoons
I also...
#water
114 reads
0 Comments
Rape Sells
I tried to sell
A volume of poetry
To a certain publishing house
A few months back
I met with a representative
Who claimed her name was Darcey
She had an immense forehead
And bad Botox on her lips
She claimed she liked some of my stuff
The more visceral poems
But didn’t fully believe the rest
She didn’t trust my youthful erection at my mother’s funeral
Or the sex I had with vague consent
She told me, “look... Rape sells- but Jermaine, you are not a rapist, and we both know it”
...
A volume of poetry
To a certain publishing house
A few months back
I met with a representative
Who claimed her name was Darcey
She had an immense forehead
And bad Botox on her lips
She claimed she liked some of my stuff
The more visceral poems
But didn’t fully believe the rest
She didn’t trust my youthful erection at my mother’s funeral
Or the sex I had with vague consent
She told me, “look... Rape sells- but Jermaine, you are not a rapist, and we both know it”
...
#abuse
#MeToo
#LifeAsAWriter
#UnrequitedLove
#ForbiddenLove
157 reads
1 Comment
People Watching
Every time
I go to lick
The sugar off the pixie stick
I grin and stare
At John and Claire
Who run back to mumsy, on the quick
I go to lick
The sugar off the pixie stick
I grin and stare
At John and Claire
Who run back to mumsy, on the quick
#love
#children
#family
112 reads
3 Comments
I’d rather have a moped than a wife
There’s a certain kind of vehicle I’ve seen
Not a segway or a motorcycle, but something in between
I’d ride that thing in circles all my life
Cause I’d rather have a moped than a wife
Mopeds never flirt with guys they meet
Don’t put you down unless they hit some black ice on the street
Don’t prattle on and cause you endless strife
I’d rather have a moped than a wife
If I died on a moped folks would laugh
And when I got to heaven I’d demand my money back
But a spouse will...
Not a segway or a motorcycle, but something in between
I’d ride that thing in circles all my life
Cause I’d rather have a moped than a wife
Mopeds never flirt with guys they meet
Don’t put you down unless they hit some black ice on the street
Don’t prattle on and cause you endless strife
I’d rather have a moped than a wife
If I died on a moped folks would laugh
And when I got to heaven I’d demand my money back
But a spouse will...
#love
102 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by Jermainesplain