The Earth is Trembling!

Excellent spill, Nourish! Such a powerful message you send to the world! If you want change in the world, get out there and work for it... It's not going to happen if we just sit on our asses and hope for it. And you're right. Recycling one bottle won't make a difference, but it's a step in the right direction. It's going to take a drastic change, on a much larger scale, if we are going to turn this thing around... And that's if we aren't already too late 💔

It is good to see others who care so much about our environment, and about the current events that threaten our sweet, Mother Earth. Thank you for your care. Such a beautiful heart you have 😊❤️

Thank you so much for sharing this. This climate crisis is only going to get worse if we don't step up to the plate!

I appreciate every day I have left not to lose hope but things look so grim.

All we can do is try our best to rebuild and preserve.

Thank you Ru. I completely agree. It’s up to us as the ppl if our government is neglecting to make a large enough effort.

I don't think Gandhi could've meant it any better than this when he said "Be the change you want to see".   We can only pray this new generation rises to the task if they want any kind of future.  

I would honor your request for honest critique with the following:

Today we must plant the seed
[that fell] ( fallen ) from Adam’s forbidden fruit,
[give] ( return ) the garden [back]( ; ) [and] put our brimstone down

In this stanza I want to highlight the economy of words. The brackets suggest what you can do without, while the parenthesis are suggestions.  Here I suggested losing five words by either altering the tense, i.e. - fallen, or replacing a word which implies two words, i.e. - return instead of give back.  All this does is tighten the verse as such:

Today we must plant the seed
fallen from Adam’s forbidden fruit,
return the garden; put our brimstone down

Beg [the] ( our ) trembling Earth 🌎
to fear not [the] ( burning )  fire 🔥 [on land]
nor missiles [that burn] brighter than [the] sun
in the night sky

Here I would like to highlight repetition, as you've used 'the' four times in this stanza alone.  There are many ways to reduce repetition in poetry, from eliminating to expanding our vocabulary; or, a simple alteration of text. We can demonstrate that here by substituting the first with 'our' in L1; then perhaps altering burn to burning in L2 so that it plays into trembling in L1.  Altering to burning would render 'the' unneeded, as well as 'on land' as redundant, as fires typically burn on land unless an oil spill of sorts.  Also, you don't need 'burning bright' in L3,  as it's implied that missiles do burn bright as comets or fireballs.  Thus, I felt it would be better served in L2.   Also, for dramatic impact I would suggest altering sun to suns - as the Universe contains millions of them. This small plural would also eliminate 'the' in that line.  The last line is perfect as is. Thus, the changes would reflect the stanza as such:

Beg our trembling Earth 🌎
to fear not burning fire 🔥
nor missiles brighter than suns
in the night sky


Are there any shooting stars left?

This line is very impactful, particularly the way you have it isolated for emphasis. Well done.

We’ve washed our hands in [the] melting ice—
[We’ve] d(r)ank [the] water (un)til [all we had was] (transformed ) /
( into ) lead lemonade and mud mojitos( ; )
we are drunk off denial
(t)hinking [putting] one bottle [in a] recycling [bin] is enough.

Here I'm applying both points I've stressed in the first two stanza revisions regarding eliminating repetition and economy use of words in with the following:  firstly, 'the' in L1 is not needed for a smooth read; secondly, I've eliminated the second 'We've' in L2 by using an em dash to end L1. You could also use a semi-colon, or even a comma; however, I prefer the em dash for emphasis.  I also corrected the spelling of drank, and removed 'the'  because it's extraneous. I am suggesting you use the form spelling of 'until' because of the serious nature of the verse.  Also, you could replace four words with one: transformed. Lastly, I suggest dividing the line for impact purposes.  I've started the new line with 'into' so it will work with mojito, and ended it with a semicolon to connect it to the next line - which is perfect; thirdly, 'Thinking putting' reads very awkward, so I suggest removing the latter for a smoother read.  I also revised the syntax  a bit to eliminate excess wordage.  

If taken into consideration, the stanza would read as follows:

We’ve washed our hands in melting ice—
drank water until transformed
into lead lemonade and mud mojitos;
we are drunk off denial
thinking recycling one bottle is enough.

I’m praying for a cloud where people [are] thirst[y].
I’m praying for a patch of green,
[a] ( the ) day a white flag waves
and fresh air enters my lungs,
a day I [can] see [the] reflection(s) of (me) [smile] in blue.

This stanza needed a bit of reworking for maximum impact, or set up before the final couplet.  I've applied the same principles as the former stanzas for what I believe will tighten it up into a springboard for a phenomenal ending.

I’m praying for a cloud where people thirst.
I’m praying for a patch of green,
a day white flags wave
and fresh air enters my lungs—
a day I see reflections of me in blue.

I’ve got my hands in [the] dirt—
[When] will you sow your seed?

Eliminating unnecessary tightens up that amazing challenge!

I've got my hands in dirt —
will you sow your seeds?

When put together, the revisions look like this:

The Earth is Trembling!

Today we must plant the seed
fallen from Adam’s forbidden fruit,
return the garden; put our brimstone down

Beg our trembling Earth 🌎
to fear not burning fire 🔥
nor missiles brighter than suns
in the night sky

Are there any shooting stars left?

We’ve washed our hands in melting ice—
drank water until transformed
into lead lemonade and mud mojitos;
we are drunk off denial
thinking recycling one bottle is enough.

I’m praying for a cloud where people thirst.
I’m praying for a patch of green,
a day white flags wave
and fresh air enters my lungs—
a day I see reflections of me in blue.

I've got my hands in dirt —
will you sow your seeds?
~

Please remember that honest critique is honoring your request for such with time.  All critique, with the exception of proper grammar and spelling ( unless intentional for purposes of dialect ) is largely opinion based on personal preference.  You have a good command on language as a whole.  Also your thoughts and feelings regarding vital issues are commendable.  

Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to offer critique.  

Wow 🤩 can I seriously hire you as my editor ?! Thank you.  Your suggestions are perfect!!!

I appreciate you taking your time to break down everything like you did. I wrote this poem quickly before work this morning. I will try to keep in mind your suggestions on my next pieces. ❤️🙌

I'm happy I could help and that you accepted it in the spirit it was given.  ❤️

( Wowzers @ Ahavati's comprehensive critique.)

And more Wowz at your choice of words, Cruz -

such as "put our brimstone down" which draws attention to the Biblical in Stanza 1.

"Are there any shooting stars left?" I found this line to be disheartening, as what is Life without anything to wish for - yet sadly we can't have anything to wish for without Tribulations like this.

Great poem! And, keep in mind that what Ahavati suggested is still your Great poem!

Isn’t she the greatest?! Thank you for the awesome comments. 😃 Made me smile.

Many people look to the governments to take action - and rightly so.

But we must also look to the mirror, and ask ...

Very rightly so.