deepundergroundpoetry.com
the opposite of ghosts
aloof as moon awaiting dawn
eyes linger on electric waves
mirages on the ceiling tiles
our measured breath-fall keeping time
eyes linger on electric waves
the press of you the weight of years
our measured breath-fall keeping time
your soul and spirit’s loss of me
the press of you the weight of years
the mem’ry of your every dance
your soul and spirit's loss of me
the trappings of a happy life
the mem’ry of your every dance
the joy we sold for pretty things
the trappings of a happy life
and now remain as empty shells
the joy we sold for pretty things
we spent our love in prophets’ waste
and now remain as empty shells
become the opposite of ghosts
we spent our love in prophets’ waste
mirages on the ceiling tiles
become the opposite of ghosts
aloof as moon awaiting dawn
Published 17th Feb 2018
| Edited 18th Feb 2018
Author's Note
the line "opposite of ghosts" came first, it took a long time and much pen and ink and multiple revisions to the line, but when it finally settled to "aloof as moon awaiting dawn" I could begin to write - it wrote itself as a Pantoum
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
18th Feb 2018 2:19am
This is an awesome line to open with,
"aloof as moon awaiting dawn"
It sounds amazing, the whole poem flows nicely..
"aloof as moon awaiting dawn"
It sounds amazing, the whole poem flows nicely..
And just as time was want to make you wait till this amazing piece would write itself, so too must I wait till time has me absorb, and then too, to write...
For the honor of having read this Pantoum compels me to reply only when I am worthy to do justice by it.
✨
For the honor of having read this Pantoum compels me to reply only when I am worthy to do justice by it.
✨
