Lost myself

Playing, dancing, trying to touch the sky,
Living like there's no tomorrow.
Bruised knees, pigtails
And an awkward smile,
Where's that child now,
Where has she gone?

The outcast, weirdo, the ugly one?
I don't belong here, they must be right.
Who am I kidding, i know it's true,
Oh, when did I become so blue?

Worthless, such a disgrace,
Looking in the mirror, who are you?
Maybe I just need some space..
I'll slit my wrist again,
There's nothing else to do.

Where has gone that child
With a heart so big, who always smiled?
Momma's not proud anymore,
She's crying
As she watches her child slowly dying...

All I do is harm, that you really can't deny.
I tore my family apart,
Can no longer look them in the eye.

The childhood dream turned into a nightmare
As the child turned into a monster,
And life turned into a battle.

I am nothing, can't be saved,
All I've got's a razor blade
And some white powder,
Will I be heard if I scream louder?

I'm helpless no matter how hard you try,
You watch me slowly fade away,
As I watch you cry,
Don't know what to say.

I don't care, I can't feel,
Even though I wish I did,
I guess I'm unable to heal.
To escape this world that's not real
Is all I long for
Though the emptiness won't go away,
Give me the white stuff
And maybe I'll stay...