post-fuck limp

Note to self: don’t get stoned and have sex
his hands will feel like they belong to someone else
and your closed eyelids will take you to places
you don’t want to remember

Your open eyes will remind you that you’re safe
that he’s there with you, and that you trust him
you’re scared to blink for that fraction of a second
where you lose his face to the darkness
you don’t want to be anywhere else
but here with him

He kisses you like you are life itself
and you feel everything from desire to fear
overthinking everything too much until you realise
thinking won’t save you from the darkness inside
there is only one way to reclaim the things that you lost
and you can hear the tremor in your voice
when you whisper “fuck me”
but you need to feel him inside
giving you pleasure where there was once only pain
getting lost in the way he feels inside of you
remaking your body into something
that has never felt more alive than in this moment

You fuck until you can’t fuck anymore
he stops when you ask, even though he’s not yet spent
but you fall asleep in each other’s arms anyway
respected and loved for the first time ever

© Indie Adams 2016