White Sea

for David

In your bed, a soft sea of crinkled white I drowned
and stopped breathing in and will remember the look
of forever, my nails digging hard into the sheets
and separating them from the mattress. You bent me
over and pushed my face into them as I choked on
your sweat and cologne, plowing me harder from behind
than I have ever been pummeled and owned in my life.
Falling in love as you held me open and warned me so harshly
Don’t you ever fucking move. I reached behind me to hold
onto your thighs for dear life as you poured yourself into me
like a cup. Leaving your room silently but bracing my hands
at your chest and kissing the sweet corner of your mouth,
tiptoeing through your living room so as not to wake your
roommate while you grabbed a hard fistful of my ass as I left out
the door. Coming home and using the restroom, the sharp
burning pain, a soreness where I find you've made me
bleed. And this morning waking up in my bed and reaching
down between my legs, finding myself still flooded with you
because I didn't want to shower, wanted to keep you in me
as long as possible. Bringing my fingers to my nose and
learning that I reek with you and how I love it, and I never ever
want to know the taste of hot water again, that terrible
cleansing and washing away.