deepundergroundpoetry.com
Messy
I can't do
love
but I know
how to fuck
and that's
about it.
He wonders
why
I'm unable
to sustain
our bond.
Truth
be told
he doesn't
know
how to
lie straight
in bed.
And she
has absolutely
no idea
what he
does
to me
for me
that makes
us
an us.
Published 24th Aug 2016
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likes 10
reading list entries 0
comments 7
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The author encourages honest critique.
24th Aug 2016 1:24pm
Fucking sustains work and paying bills
Love gets in the way of the pleasure often
Like
Love gets in the way of the pleasure often
Like
Anonymous
- Edited 24th Aug 2016 1:40pm
24th Aug 2016 1:39pm
<< post removed >>
24th Aug 2016 6:31pm
24th Aug 2016 7:36pm
I enjoyed that first stanza. The last stanza ended curiously. The line, "...what he does to me..." I wondered if it could also be "...what he does for me..." that would make you an "us".
25th Aug 2016 6:31am
sordid affairs, so much more satisfying when not intruded upon by love.
'fuck': it's a great deal more than simply four letters...
'fuck': it's a great deal more than simply four letters...
25th Aug 2016 7:11pm
To enjoy the flesh, I can deal with no love, but I'd put money on it
U really aren't that cold anyways :)
U really aren't that cold anyways :)
25th Aug 2016 10:29pm
It does sound a bit complicated, particularly with the introduction of the "she" in the last stanza. You're the one who understands him, hoping the two of you can move on and leave that mess behind. Stellar work Shadow!
