Big Jim Friendly

 Once upon a time
In a land far away
In a cute thatched cottage
On the edge of an enchanted wood
Lived a man
A gentle man
A kind man
Always ready to help
Never a harsh word spoken
The kind of man that
Would give you the shirt of his back
Would give you his last penny
A man who loved his wife and children
And gave them the best of everything he could
He helped everyone he could
With a warm smile
And a heartfelt hug
He was almost saintly
News of his good deeds
And saintly ways
Spread throughout the land
It even reached the ears of the king
Who was also a man
Just a different kind of man
He arranged a banquet in this man’s honour
The king would accept no refusal
The man arrived on time
They all sat down to dine
The king and his men spent the entire evening
Trying to ply the man with drink and drugs
All to no avail
They tried to start fights and arguments with him
Again all to no avail
The king in frustration
Produced the man’s two children
He slit both their throats
As his mean held the man down
The king then produced the man’s wife
Raping her on the baqueting table
And then slitting her throat
As the man was held down
Forced to watch
The king threw the man into his dungeon
His sobbing was heard throughout the land
The next day an angry mob
Appeared at the castle gate
Demanding the death of the man
The king being the king obliged them
The man was taken to the town square
And was tortured and executed
In front of the braying mob
Most of whom he had shown kindness
Nobody came to his rescue
No fairy godmother
No good or white witch
No faire folk
There is no moral to this tale
No happy ending
Everybody did not live happily ever after
So fuckin what

The End