deepundergroundpoetry.com
BRUISES...
Poor little girl, cloaked in polka dots of blue, head slung back, auburn curls feathering out, Swirling, twirling, whirling, round and round. ¤ Poor little girl, cloaked in polka dots of blue, carefree and dancing with wild abandonment. Melodies of ghostly violins vibrated in tragedy and despair. ¤ Poor little girl, cloaked in polka dots of blue, arms spread wide, an unearthly smile playing bout her lips. Round and round, abandoned and free. ¤ Poor little girl, cloaked in polka dots of blue, swirling, twirling, whirling, round and round, dancing to melodies vibrating in tragedy and despair, young, wild and free. ¤
Published 31st Dec 2015
| Edited 2nd Jan 2016
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 16
reading list entries 3
comments 19
reads 1134
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
31st Dec 2015 10:53pm
31st Dec 2015 11:02pm
Thank you! As a little girl I loved twirling and whirling, made me feel free!LoL Thanx for replying, SURVIVOR➰
1st Jan 2016 5:37am
there is a haunting here that attempts
to shroud the child in sorrow that is unspoken;
spectral violins weeping a dirge.
but still she dances...
to shroud the child in sorrow that is unspoken;
spectral violins weeping a dirge.
but still she dances...
1st Jan 2016 7:14am
Amazing how a child can defy sorrow. Thanx for replying, much appreciated! SURVIVOR➰
1st Jan 2016 4:54pm
simply beautiful despite a background feeling of tragedy and darkness.
this is another wee cracker of a poem - love it :-)
this is another wee cracker of a poem - love it :-)
1st Jan 2016 5:08pm
Children are so carefree, even if only for a min. Escapism at it's finest😉! Thanx for the compliment, which I graciously accept, & replying. I always look forward to hearing from you!➰
1st Jan 2016 5:12pm
I love polka dots! My shirt I'm wearing now has polka dots. Lol I love the image I'm seeing. Beautiful write (:
1st Jan 2016 5:30pm
As a child, I always called my bruises polka dots! Much, much more acceptable LoL! I like polka dots to. Thanx for the gracious compliment & for dressing apropiatly, humbly appreciated🎨! ➰
1st Jan 2016 7:14pm
Well sounded beautiful even if covered in "blue polka dots." And now whenever I see polka dots I'm gonna picture a little girl twirling around
1st Jan 2016 7:32pm
Much better than bruise spots! Lil girls looovvee polka dots, at least mine did. How awesome, because of polka dots, you'll always picture a beautiful child twirling! That warms this old soul. Thank you so much for that, what fun👣!
1st Jan 2016 7:25pm
The innocence reflected in this piece is stark... a direct contrast to the tragedy surrounding it. This contrasts leads to very different ways to read the "wild and free" you conclude with. A haunting ache for the future is felt here. Nicely done.
Michael
Michael
1st Jan 2016 11:01pm
WOW! I love your poetry. I used to be embarrassed about my bruises, so they became polka dots, then I was free to twhirl & whirl! Thank you so much for replying & recognizing the haunted escapism! Graciously, I accept your compliment, thank you, SURVIVOR➰
2nd Jan 2016 9:19pm
2nd Jan 2016 11:41pm
You should give it a whirl, dead serious, an amazing feeling! Thanx for the read list, always an honor! Thank you for replying,➰
2nd Jan 2016 9:45pm
one of your best writes for me friend, hums disturbingly like a childs school song
2nd Jan 2016 11:43pm
It is kinda haunting isn't it! Thanx for the read list, you know that's an honor. I graciously accept the compliment, good to hear your words, respect & love, ➰
4th Jan 2016 6:05pm
A child, a girl, a little girl I was when I'd be off on my own, humming, sing-song, my ponytail straight out as I'd spin around and around, all in my world, a world surrounding me alone, dizzy with everything going the opposite direction...
4th Jan 2016 8:49pm
4th Jul 2016 5:58am
The emotional tone of the poem is sad and lovely and mad haunting. I enjoyed it
