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"IF" ( Mental Diary)


 
 
I never claimed to be the perfect flower for him  
but, if I were anything less than an exquisite bloom  
his lips should have informed me  
 
If the intimacy I was meant to finance  
diminish in value with each uncertain inhale,  
and the overwhelming worth of romance’s assets  
never recoup from life’s insufferable trails,  
then I can truly say love came with a price  
that I couldn’t afford  
 
*I’m venting, bear with me ...*  
 
How could I hold his hand and walk by his side,  
when my wrists were tied?  
My availability was the equivalent of borrowed time  
and in his mind, he was comfortable standing in line,  
yet I was never qualified to satisfy his needs  
because he didn’t fill out the proper documents  
explaining what it takes to satiate his heart; in legible print  
 
If we were never on one accord...  
how could our love catch fire and reach a heat index hot enough,  
that when years have passed and grey-hair is the new black,  
he’d still be able to enjoy me on.......simmer.  
~I was lookin' forward to that~  
 
*still venting, I’ve got to get this off my chest…..*  
 
If living in the moment exhibited no realistic option  
for a future together,  
then lust should have fondled temptation  
and flirted with passion, while love stood at a distance…..  
exposing just the carnal face of us  
 
I didn’t tell him love still lingered…  
just to get his attention and plant false hope in soiled memories,  
only to watch a second chance die before it’s born  
 
I told him love still lingered,  
because it......  
 
*vent interrupted*  
 
 
 
Rain~  
 
 
 
 
(Inspiration from past love)  
 
 
rain1courtel
Written by rain1courtel (RainC)
Published | Edited 1st Apr 2016
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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