Internal Dialogues of Dysfunction (co-written with Chowmaster)

 I tell you how I feel  
  And spit poison    
I touch you in affection  
  And bruise your skin  
I wait for you to come to me  
  And balk at your approach
I seek your attention  
  And insult you  
I can’t wait to see you again  
  And ignore you  

You want to pin me down    
Under your ten ton thumb    
The places you have put me  
And the places that you keep me  
Dig fresh wounds and unearth the old
Until you have created  
A mess of a masterpiece.    

I say I am patient  
  But eagerly waiting  
You want to know what I am thinking  
  And I clobber you with emotion  

If you want me…    
Find my sordid truths,  
The ones you misconstrue    
That are much softer    
Than your cruel fuck-festive fantasies.  
I am not just your  
Wicked bitch.
Nor your lean, devious  
Porn star.  

I want to show you off  
  Like a prize I’ve won in a contest  
To validate my worth  
  I want you to love me  
Because  
  I don’t know how to love myself.