"Fiction vs non fiction"

This right here is a total mix up.
this right here will be a sure complete masterpiece of a fuck up.
i can talk about anything.
the voices i hear within my head when my ear drums ring.
hahaha,i can already tell this is gonna be some crazy shit.
crazy as when i use to fantasize of givin' my wrists the slit.
my mind has been infected since day 1 of my birth.
i won't stop speaking on this until i get my ride in a hearse.
i can still remember all the horrible acts i committed as a child.
i guess you can say i was sadistic,didn't care,yes i was wild.
evil as sin,potent as gin.
i needs my scalpel before i can begin.
i broke god's commandment of "thou shalt not kill."
when i did kill,it was all for a cheap ass thrill.
what a rush,what a sight.
when it comes to confronting natas,it's a never ending fight.
i recall losing my virginity at the will of my left hand.
sex with her,possibly catch a std,possibly get her pregnant,
i be damned.
i ruined minds,i inflicted pain.
i thought i could wash away all the agony i caused,
by standing in the hard rain.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
i was so fucking wrong at thinking like that.
i'd be better off dead,now that my friends is a for sure fact.
to this day i have daydreams of living a stress free life.
i have daydreams of a life with no pain & sorrow.
and never will it be so hard to say goodbye to tomorrow.