Storm

I hold myself in disdain
I don't give a fuck
I've got nothing to hide
No one understands
A part of me has died

Utopia rejected on Earth that's hell
My mind is lonely, no different from a cell
My body is sick, which I can't leave behind
What will it take to medicate the mind

Exit the womb to a tomb
Can't adjust
Alone in my room
Depend on my departed friend
Not remembering
How long has it been
If there's one thing I've learned
Comfort cannot be found
Nowhere to grow
Nobody's fault but mine
Painfully existing alone
Infinite incarceration

You have to lose so much to find your heart
Even your innocence
Thinking back as a kid
What being alone did
It’s not so pretty now
That's where addiction was found
I'd burn those houses down
Into a hole in the ground
And I'd burn them down again
And I'd make it evident
With satisfaction just to laugh at the fucking flames

Now as I'm older and wiser
I've worked out my mistakes
I made sure that my past is left behind
No one knows how much the mind can take

I cannot fix
what I did not break--
but I tried to neutralize it,
your anger
emotions
when I could.

I felt the pressure
today
(building)
Everyone else did, too.

Funny
how time slows
just before the worst--
is it so we can have a few more seconds
to escape
or so the pain is dulled?

We knew today was different
and somehow
it was coming
(this time)
for real--

No more regersals.
Could I have steered things differently
years ago
in the classroom
where I taught you?

Probably not.

That's the sad part--
seeing it coming
and not one could help you
except yourself
if you had just tried.

Do we have to worry
about tomorrow
or some other tomorrow
that you'll come back for us
and try to finish
what was interrupted today?

I should have tried harder
but I thought it was enough
when I saw your smile
when I told you
that we take no disease
and hurt with us
when we die
because those aren't allowed
in heaven.

Maybe that seed will still grow
and this, too
shall pass.

It’s a firestorm  
that rages… and whirls… within my body,  
that no hand of sanity can smother.  

My innards burn,  
my blood boils,  
the flesh upon me bubbles.  
 
Sane, as I may have been before,  
the virtues that encased this body with innocence  
has long but burned away.

what can she say when a storm within
the depths of her heart had started to grow
the cold touches of betrayal begin to descent
in her complacency and trust so sure

the twenty years of togetherness
gone in a minute like a train crash
nothing seemed to make sense
gone now the security just love unsure
 
hubby dear so handsome so faithful
had tasted the forbidden fruit of outside love
embraced the lovemaking on a strange bed
tasted the ambrosia and varieties of excitement

now he chose to stray and play hard
indulging in once was mere fantasy
he couldn't return and shattered his world
with his wife, once beloved now a memory

her world was torn asunder
her thoughts were storms wrecking her heart
sacrifices made love rendered now all dusts
she watched him leave silently screaming

Amid the chaos she didn't drown
nor did she surrender into madness
she gathered the pieces of her around
weathered the storm summoning strength

when the storm abated and her tears dried up
her heart was healed her smile returned
she stood up and set herself free
fighting to the peak of her own destiny

she fell in love with another man
who left for the stars so far away
she cried for him and hurt again
but she always knew there would be storms

she went through storms life had for her
she emerged strong ready for destinations
that life would push for her to adventure
I am strong, a survivor of storms

I'm caught up in this storm
On my way home
It's pouring down my tears
Flooding my eyes for years

Years of constant fears
Shriek of terror in my ears
And the anxiety that  crawls in
All over my decayed skin

I'ma carve it out
There's no doubt
I just need to cut deep
Enough - I'm a creep

A few more steps up the ridge
No more pain in this glitch
I'm living day by day
My fix is on the way

Thunders roar
Down the shore
From crimson clouds
Numbing shouts

Of my crimson thoughts
Chocking knots
As I walk, walk alone
On my way home

In the throws of youth there is a constant storm
A hurricane of unrelenting confusion, and frustration
Deafening thunder roars, and fierce gales screech

How can one see the path, when it keeps getting blown away?
A wall of manipulation separates their eyes from the beauty beyond the monsoon
Anxiety takes hold, along with its companion claustrophobia

To find shelter, you must seek to find the eye of the storm
The center of the chaos, which is calm
For that is where you will find your own center

You've been seeking what is beyond, while overlooking what is within
The piece of yourself In the middle of it all
Seek the elegance of the present

To weather the storm you must walk through it
Braving it's ferocious force
You must find the eye of the storm

On my little island,there is always peace.
Nobody who tries to hurt me.
And nobody leaves.

With palm trees,sunshine.
My little island filled with flowers.
Filled with diamonds,gold.

Jewelry,I know.
Where you and me will feel whole.
And watch the starry skies tonight.

On my little island,there's none to please.
I won't be a burden,I won't feel unease.
If I could leave this world.

My little island,no place like home.
Even if it's all in my head,I know.
A paradise of peace,all on my own.

I won't be sad on my little island.
I won't be insecure no more.
And there's nobody I have to be.

By standarts,rules.
I'll just be me.
So take my hand and come with me.

Together on my little island,we'll be able to breathe.
And no need to hide what's underneath.
Let's go to my hidden paradise.

Give you comfort and see the joy in your eyes.
As we let out peaceful sighs.
Where time slowly flies.

Let's fly together and escape our problems.
On my little island,full of serenity and peace.
There is none to please.

Let us travel far away and feel at ease.
Looking at the sunset,evergreen trees.
On the shore,near the deep,blue seas.

If I could live for just one day.
It would feel like eternity,I would come here,put my frown away.
I could travel the whole night.

If it means I could escape to my little island for a moment.
Use my bed to sail away.
I could brighten up my eyes any day.

I sure won't be crying on my little island.
Let's travel in my head.
Spend time together,as we cuddle in bed.

I'll wipe the tears you shed.
And show you what happiness truly meant.